[quietlykinky]

I'm dying to get a little kinky (whips, cuffs) stuff like that but my husband has no interest in it could he just be nervous about trying it? I tried showing him a little whip & he instantly said that's for horses and dropped the subject

[Motorguy]

I'm dying to get a little kinky (whips, cuffs) stuff like that but my husband has no interest in it could he just be nervous about trying it? I tried showing him a little whip & he instantly said that's for horses and dropped the subject

Well Kinky this looks like something your husband wants nothing to do with this type of life style. This may take you some serous work over time for hubby to a except it if he will ever want to try this type kink in the bedroom. So good luck on your adventure in trying to in the future.

[rcoreyus]

Sadly not everyone likes that sort of play. Beyond the specifics, "kinky" seems to appeal to some people and not to others, seems pretty evenly split between men and women. Its not clear its related to peoples overall interest in sex.

It is sad that society generally doesn't accept the idea that if there is something sexual that you want but that your partner doesn't like, you could get it elsewhere.

[Motorguy]

Sadly not everyone likes that sort of play. Beyond the specifics, "kinky" seems to appeal to some people and not to others, seems pretty evenly split between men and women. Its not clear its related to peoples overall interest in sex.

It is sad that society generally doesn't accept the idea that if there is something sexual that you want but that your partner doesn't like, you could get it elsewhere.

Well many have this way of thinking if you don't think like them or live like them then you must be weird or mentally disturb person. That's not how things should work not everyone going to like the same thing or believe the same thing, if everyone did it would be a very boring life for everyone. But to hammer on someone because you don't like there life style who's to say your life style is the right way or wrong way.

[quietlykinky]

So should i just not mention it fir a while and give him time to adjust to what i said or just drop it for good

[effy2014]

Try reading to him first. There are lots of well written fetish books out there -- including 50 Shades of Grey. Find a great story that turns you on (at the level of kink that you are interested in) and read it to him one night. If it leads to great sex, then he may be interested in pursuing it.

IMO, whips are not a good first step. Lots of men, me included, have a difficult time striking a woman under any circumstances. Took me a while even to spank her butt . . . . Perhaps you can start with restraints -- tie him up and have your way with him. There are lots of great restraints (Amazon even carries them). He may return the favor. Then you can go further and further.

[Motorguy]

So should i just not mention it fir a while and give him time to adjust to what i said or just drop it for good

I really think your hubby is not at all on the fence of this type of kink. You best just drop it for a while maybe another time. OR sit down with your hubby and explained to him you like to try this you may not want to do it pass one time but to give it a try only once maybe he will. When i was young I use to hate some foods my mother said you going to at least try it you hate it then she could except that answer but I had to at least try before hating it. But commutation is really needed here with you and your hubby maybe this time you can find out what type of kink he would like to try with you. Like I say fair is fair right.

[quietlykinky]

Thanx guys! I'm definitely going to get somebooks out tonight and see how he feels after hearing some stories lol if not i can live with it

[Motorguy]

Thanx guys! I'm definitely going to get somebooks out tonight and see how he feels after hearing some stories lol if not i can live with it

Good luck Kinky, I hope it all works out for you. That is a good touch some stories sounds very seduction for sure enjoy yourself.

[jen1447]

Kinky, you posted in the 'Secretly a freak' thread too, which I mention just because I think there's an important distinction there that shows your behavior should be gauged moreso on you than your partner. There's a difference between being a 'freak' and being occasionally kinky. I think kinkyness in a variety of forms is quite common, and if what you're describing about yourself is that you occasionally like some somewhat unusual and adventurous sex acts, welcome to the club because tons of people are in it. But if you describe yourself as a genuine 'freak,' that's a different thing. It typically means that you need (as in can't live without) a lot of adventurous and borderline kinky/deviant sexual activity on a regular basis. If so, welcome to that club too, because there are a lot of us in that one as well.

The difference as applies to you tho is that if you are kinky, you can negotiate potential kinkyness with your partner to satisfy you. If you're a freak tho, and he's not, that's basically a major incompatibility, one that might even doom your relationship.

So to figure this out, don't ask yourself initially how you can modify your partner's behavior. Ask yourself first instead exactly where you fall on the kinky/freaky scale, and that should answer how to proceed with your partner.