[missthatfun]

I'll make this as short and sweet as possible! In the beginning it seemed we were meant for each other sexually little did I know I was deceived! He gave me sex all the time when he wanted it when i wanted it!!!!! Tables for him have turned he no longer gets hard when I'm dressed sexy or when I'm naked! I'm 5ft tall 110lbs blonde hair blue eyes! I think I'm sexy! And he apparently has lost interest I am willing to try new things all the time! Problem is he wants sex same position all the time! Me bent over doggie style! Dont get me wrong thats my favorite postion as well! But i love watching him cum no matter where he blows it at! I'm a beautiful woman and I can't understand why he doesn't want me! And now if I show any signs of wanting sex from him I get turned down ! Or it doesn't work I have exhausted all options I took the series pics I could by myself for him and I get no gratification from it feels like I sent them to the wrong man. I know there is nothing wrong with me my last man couldn't keep his hands off me with or without clothes on! When I undressed he was hard and ready and willing ! He actually kept my sexually appetite satisfied! Now I'm like blah! I love this man to death with all my heart! I have tried talking to him about it and he gives me excuses or lame reasons! There shouldn't be excuses or reasons why you don't want to! I tried doing the same thing to him he does to me recently! Hasn't gone as planned either! I put notes in his lunch box saying I want more sex! I'm beginning to think there is someone else ! I found gum in his under ware before washing them and the same day he came home from work and straight to the shower I went back to see if he would shake his **** at me and no but he had something white stuck in his *** hairs didn't think anything of it until I found gum in his under ware all he did was laugh about it when I confronted him about the gum! Please please give me advice !!!!!!
Signed the woman with blue ovaries

[effy2014]

You will get more responses if you move this into the sex forum. Private Message one if the Admins and she will move it.

There is obviously something else going on in the relationship or with him. Lack of sex is usually a symptom of an underlying issue. Rather than pressure him (which makes sexual dysfunctions worse) the two of you need to communicate about how you are feeling and find out what is going on. There could be a medical issue or a psychological issue. But you will never know unless there is honest communication.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Or as I am an Aussie, I've seen this and will move it for you OP.

Thanks Effy

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Can you explain what you mean a bit more please re:-

I found gum in his under ware before washing them and the same day he came home from work and straight to the shower I went back to see if he would shake his **************** at me and no but he had something white stuck in his ************ hairs didn't think anything of it until I found gum in his under ware all he did was laugh about it when I confronted him about the gum!

[bubba29]

gum? what is wrong with gum?

[Motorguy]

I'll make this as short and sweet as possible! In the beginning it seemed we were meant for each other sexually little did I know I was deceived! He gave me sex all the time when he wanted it when i wanted it!!!!! Tables for him have turned he no longer gets hard when I'm dressed sexy or when I'm naked! I'm 5ft tall 110lbs blonde hair blue eyes! I think I'm sexy! And he apparently has lost interest I am willing to try new things all the time! Problem is he wants sex same position all the time! Me bent over doggie style! Dont get me wrong thats my favorite postion as well! But i love watching him cum no matter where he blows it at! I'm a beautiful woman and I can't understand why he doesn't want me! And now if I show any signs of wanting sex from him I get turned down ! Or it doesn't work I have exhausted all options I took the series pics I could by myself for him and I get no gratification from it feels like I sent them to the wrong man. I know there is nothing wrong with me my last man couldn't keep his hands off me with or without clothes on! When I undressed he was hard and ready and willing ! He actually kept my sexually appetite satisfied! Now I'm like blah! I love this man to death with all my heart! I have tried talking to him about it and he gives me excuses or lame reasons! There shouldn't be excuses or reasons why you don't want to! I tried doing the same thing to him he does to me recently! Hasn't gone as planned either! I put notes in his lunch box saying I want more sex! I'm beginning to think there is someone else ! I found gum in his under ware before washing them and the same day he came home from work and straight to the shower I went back to see if he would shake his ******** at me and no but he had something white stuck in his ****** hairs didn't think anything of it until I found gum in his under ware all he did was laugh about it when I confronted him about the gum! Please please give me advice !!!!!!
Signed the woman with blue ovaries

Sorry about the blue ovaries i guess the same as blue testicles for guys. The first thing you need to like put your foot down and sit him down and explain to him what you found and saw and question him. For me would be a affair with the girl he was with left her game on his thigh while giving him oral pleasure and they forgot it was there.My self he lost interested in you sexually.She describe yourself as very beautiful so it's not that form him or he's a fool.But you only going to get any answer is talking to him if he just brushes it off then you can think he's having affair and that you don't need so it's his other bimbo girl or you lay it out on the line and give him these accusation you discussed here.I not sure you using condoms during sex with him but if you wasn't please go get check he may have been with other women so you want to be sure you not going to get a STD'S from him from these other women.So good luck Missthatfun on what you find out god bless you as well.

[jen1447]

This all sounds extremely superficial. The extent of your confusion is just that you can't understand why he wouldn't want you at all times because you're hot? It sounds like you've been together for a while. Some questions I'd ask myself are is he resentful of me for some (even non-sexual) reason, is he stressed out, depressed, does he possibly have physical erectile issues, is he seeing someone else (what I think you're getting at with the "gum" in his underwear), does he dislike my perfume, my hair, the sound of my voice, do I do or say things that grate on him in the immediate sense, is he maybe intimidated by my sexual energy, has he had serious negative experiences with women in the past, major rejection, etc., etc., etc.

[missthatfun]

jen1447 said:
Yesterday 10:31 AM

This all sounds extremely superficial. The extent of your confusion is just that you can't understand why he wouldn't want you at all times because you're hot? It sounds like you've been together for a while. Some questions I'd ask myself are is he resentful of me for some (even non-sexual) reason, is he stressed out, depressed, does he possibly have physical erectile issues, is he seeing someone else (what I think you're getting at with the "gum" in his underwear), does he dislike my perfume, my hair, the sound of my voice, do I do or say things that grate on him in the immediate sense, is he maybe intimidated by my sexual energy, has he had serious negative experiences with women in the past, major rejection, etc., etc., etc.

Nothing has changed in our lives so no depression, being tired, no new anything for that matter and he has no problem get erections at the beach or at the pool when he sees other woman dressed in bikinis but he can't get it up with me like that! Or if we watch porn he has no problems getting erect! It's not superficial just because I'm confident in my looks on the outside or how amazingly beautiful I am in the inside because my real beauty extends further than my outer beauty!!! All I'm asking is how does a man go from not getting enough of you sexually then all if a sudden bomb like a bomb stop having any sexual contact with you hardly at all! We have sat down and talked about this before and he doesn't want to talk about any of it! Then coming home getting in shower I see something white stuck in butt hairs! He said it was toilet paper an next day I find gum stuck in the butt of his under ware! When we first got together we sat down talked fully an openly about our past relationships bad or good so we both know about each other's pasts because we live in a very small town and we both know a lot of same people! He's not stressed out about anything ! I take care of the house and everything! We both work the same jobs we have been! Also he said he has never had anyone keep up with his sexual desires like me! He did say he thought my libido was a little higher than his but I didn't expect going from high to very low on his part! I knew it might slow down with time but not this much! I guess it's like this when you first get into a relationship don't give what you plan on taking away later! Don't over put out if you don't plan on putting out that much for the rest of the relationship ! Our relationship is based on love first I made him wait and wait to be sexual with him! We didn't even kiss for awhile! Then we had sex all the time every chance we got! We tried new things all the time! Now it's like it is a chore! And he doesn't want to change how we do it at all! Seems like the intimacy is lacking in the sex as well like he's not connected to it or he's not into it with me like he's not even there in his mind! Not sure what else to say or do! Why should I feel non sexual satisfaction if he's not into it !? Should I leave the relationship ?! Should I stay because he is my soulmate ?! Should I try and satisfy myself for the rest of my life!? He doesn't give me any straight up answers when we talk about sex !

[effy2014]

In relationships, it's communicate or die. He is not your soulmate if he refuses to communicate about something so important to you. He is also not your soulmate if the two of you have different levels of sexual satisfaction.

I think what Jen was trying to convey is that there was a lot of hyperbole in your writing. This isn't about your beauty as a person, inside or out. As you write, he was very sexual in the beginning and you are the same person. However, to insist that nothing of substance has changed makes no sense. His sex drive has taken a nose dive. There is a reason for it. The fact that he does not communicate well with you suggests that he is not telling you important things. To deny that there is trouble somewhere in his life or the relationship is to be blind since there is a very significant symptom (no sex).

There is only one thing to do. He has to talk with you. If he wants the relationship to survive, he MUST honestly communicate. But you have to make it safe for him to talk. No judgments. Don't approach him with frustration. If you think he might just be your soulmate, it is worth forcing the truth out of him rather than speculating what weird gum fetish might be going on.

[missthatfun]

Effy 2014 that was perfectly said thank you so very much !!!!!!