[mzhk]

Sorry for the graphic words that I am about to type. I am not too great on wording things so I am just going to write off the top of my head. Ladies, I could def use a bit of girl talk here. I maybe 30 but not very experienced in this department. My first time was " Assault " in the exact words of the police officer writing down my statement. I've been very non social since. Well, 4 days ago I caved into temptation. We were talking about random stupid stuff and one thing lead to another? Ended up fooling around and I found myself blurting out words I never thought I'd hear myself saying to a man " I can't take it anymore. If you
want to f** me do it already ".

The reason I am in here today is because I have a hard time asking doctor's these kind of questions. My question is if you stop for a very long time? Does the nerves down there die off or something? I expected sex to be this hot and steamy moment , that every thing below the waist trembles. Instead? I found it to be kind of ackward and I didn't feel that wow. I felt like I was getting exaimed by the gyno with a glove.

He wasn't doing so great himself. It was like he couldn't keep it up. Slide out like 4 times had to go back in. started shaking in the middle of things claiming it was the kidney medication he was on.

Is this me that's broken down there? or is it just plainly no sexual attraction towards the guy that caused the no feelings down there? could you ladies pls give me some pointers

[Baboy]

You asked for the opinion of women here, but what the heck, I'll barge in and offer my opinion that you do have to worry about whether "the nerves down there die off".

I am sure you are fine and what was wrong was the timing, the guy, the chemistry.

[mzhk]

Thanks some advice is better then none. That's the word ..." chemistry". ..that was probably what was lacking.

[jns]

Sex just to have sex can be fine as long as both partners are up for it. You weren't up for it and it sounds like he wasn't either. Chalk it up to a learning experience and try to find someone who excites you or seduces you if you are not trying to find a love interest. Best of luck.

[mzhk]

Thank you jns! People in the situation are rarely as knowledgeable as outsiders. Thank you for your imput.

[DreamP346]

I know the guys have chimed in. Here is a woman's view too.

The first time is often awkward. He doesn't know your body. What buttons to press. It comes with experience with each other. What you describe is perfectly norm. The ripping each other's clothes off and having amazing orgasms is more in the movies, not reality.

Well, practice does make perfect. If you haven't been very sexually active, then you really need to practice more, both with a partner and by yourself. Were you an active participants? Did you tell him what works for you? Or did you lay back expecting him to do all the work? Was it just intercourse or was there foreplay, oral sex, playing with your clit, etc? Do you know what you like and how to give yourself an orgasm?

I ask these questions, because often, especially young inexperienced women, expect to have these exploring orgasms right away. Reality, most people don't have orgasms during first sexual encounters. Most women don't orgasm the first year of sexual experience and many women don't even know what gets them off because they don't masturbate. It's a learning process.

Unless you have had physical damage to your nerves or blood vessels, you should be physically fine down their.

BTW, men losing their erection is pretty common too. Could be a sign he was really nervous. Him sliding out may be a sign he is inexperienced too.

[mzhk]

DreamP346 - we didn't really talk about sex. Started off about cultural difference and then personalty difference. I dono what came ovet him he leaned over started kissing my neck, kissed downwards , next thing I knew he was giving me oral. Dono what came over me somewhere down the line I blurted out " if u wanna f me do it already". He asked if I was sure I screamed yes. He put on a condom and next thing I knew we were at it. Definitely was not as I had plan or hoped. I dont regret it. Kinda disappointed haha but yes, I do thank you also. I been confused for days now.

[mzhk]

Forgot to anwser your other question haha he did all the work really. I was kinda in shock it was even happening

[jns]

My question is if you stop for a very long time? Does the nerves down there die off or something? I expected sex to be this hot and steamy moment , that every thing below the waist trembles. Instead? I found it to be kind of ackward and I didn't feel that wow. I felt like I was getting exaimed by the gyno with a glove.

He wasn't doing so great himself. It was like he couldn't keep it up. Slide out like 4 times had to go back in. started shaking in the middle of things claiming it was the kidney medication he was on.

Is this me that's broken down there? or is it just plainly no sexual attraction towards the guy that caused the no feelings down there? could you ladies pls give me some pointers

Let me answer these more directly. If you stop all sexual activity for a long time you will probably not respond as strongly as someone who has at least some sexual activity every once in a while. Sexual activity could be with another person or it could masturbation. That being said, if you are receptive to someone who instinctively knows what to do to get you (specifically you) off (and is perceptive of your reactions), you could respond much stronger than you ever responded before. If you were not into what he was doing or if he was not very good at it, I can see why you felt like you were being examined by the gyno. Just know this, if the circumstances come together right, you will likely experience an orgasm where everything trembles.

As for him keeping it up, there could be many reasons. Possibly your command to do it already took too much control from him and had him doubt himself. Some guys like to be in control, others like it if their SO is in charge. Male sexuality can be tricky, too.

I don't think anything is broken on you. Lack of excitement or sexual attraction probably explains the whole situation.

[jilljames8184]

Try a lot of foreplay to get both of you ready. "Jumping in too quickly" could be subconsciously bringing back hidden memories of your assault. Extended foreplay will increase your desire and also increase your nerve stimulation response down there.