[lauralight]

I'm trying to understand others. So many people seem to have multiple sex partners, or am I just misreading how many people seem to be doing this? I find it gross, and dangerous, etc...

Laura

[soldatka]

Well, it ain't my cup of tea either! I'm happy to be with just one man myself. But if people aren't getting hurt, and proper precautions are being taken, then I don't see why people shouldn't have as many partners as they wish.

[metboogie]

I think most people here have had multiple partners over a period of time - not necessarily all at the same time....although I'm sure some here do have multiple partners going all at once - but most people would call that dating.

[libertas]

Trying to understand ..

I'm trying to understand others. So many people seem to have multiple sex partners, or am I just misreading how many people seem to be doing this? I find it gross, and dangerous, etc...

Laura

I'm considering dating women just to see how it feels. I'm all ready divorced once from a guy, and I've found a couple of women extremely appealing? I don't seehow it could hurt anyone if I'm up-front with the women.

Also known as no strings attached sex. I'm considering it, I'm confused..I'm not young, exactly at 35, but know I'm very attractive, and love a guy whom has moved on, and I'm very physically lonely.
Just wondering if anyone can talk to me about this? I have had an STD before, so I'm sooooo afraid of that again, but I'm very missing sex and that sort of enjoyment in my life(after about a year now). I know I could make a deal with a guy, like we're exclusive lovers, even if there's nothing else between us. I just abhorr bed-hopping. See my quandry?

Laura

[rcoreyus]

Sex is fun. Some would consider sex with more people to just be more varieties of fun. There is risk - but lots of fun things involve risk: skiing , mountain climbing, parachuting, etc, etc.

So, it doesn't surprise me.

[Mourningman]

Sex is kinda like mountain climbing, skiing and parachuting all at once without travelling that far.Or with a whole lot of gear.

[Guest]

i would imagine that, after your divorce, you feel alone, bitter, angry, sad - maybe not in that order. probably the apparent contradictions above stem from that.

you have a solid understanding of what you believe is OK, what is safe & responsible.

but sometimes you wonder if stepping outside that might make you a little happier? not trying to put words in your mouth.

my advice is to see the temptation to pursue casual sex with different guys - as fleeting. you won't feel that way forever, and any decisions you make today that fly in the face of what you know (beneath your immediate loneliness & pain) to be right for you could haunt you later.

and the pleasure it brings you now will be short-lived. any heartache you bring on yourself chasing those temporal pleasures could be with you for a lifetime.

it's not easy. maybe not popular. you don't have to be a prude or a nun. i'm not deciding for you what is OK sexually.

i'm just encouraging you not to ignore what YOU think is OK sexually. and don't let a broken, hurting mind trick you into doing something you'll regret.

you will heal & you will wonder why you didn't take better care of yourself when you needed it most.

[lexi]

I have had multiple partners over time and the one time when I had multiple partners during the same stretch of time it was with two men I knew really well and trusted. We used condoms and I was on bc at the time.
I was attracted to the idea of two different people because they both offered very different variations of sex...I guess it was kind of a rush not just having the regular "we're dating" sex. (I wasn't dating either of the men at the time or anyone else)

I don't know if age has anything to do with it but I know that when I was just starting college (18/19 yo) I was much more into sleeping with a couple guys then dating one.

Its all about sowing your wild oats.