[unwillingly_loved]

umm, i have 2 q's. (by the way - hi! i'm new)

1st - my man can't get inside me?
i'm a virgin and when my boyfriend and i have sex he cant get into me. i think it's because he's too gentle with me but could there be something wrong with me?

2nd - i'm a little shy
when me and my boyfriend are talking i'm all confidence and apparently sexy but once i get to the bedroom i get kind of scared that i'll do something ****** or wrong - is this valid? but recently i've decided that i need to let go of my fears but i still get weird...

answers are appreciated
thanks

[Little]

Both of those sound very normal to me.
And both of them sound like you're just not ready for sex yet, or that you need to work at it more before it actually happens.
You have to trust your boyfriend completely before you have sex with him; when you trust him, it won't be so important that you could do something that isn't perfect. Of course you'll still think about that, but it won't be so scary or important.
There COULD be "something wrong" with you because he can't get in, but I doubt it. I think you're just not ready yet; still working on being able to have sex. It took me a LONG time to be able to have sex ... a few boyfriends tried over a few years, and none could get in at all.
But now I'm with a man I love like crazy, and we have sex with no pain whatsoever. He was VERY gentle with me when we first had sex ... I was the one controlling everything. It helps if you just push in an inch or two at a time.
Good luck

[Hystorm]

You may still have a fully or partially intact Hymen.
Even if that were the case, foreplay, foreplay, foreplay....

Once a women is turned on enough, she could take a bed-post if so inclined.

Good luck.

[SinisterUrge]

1st - my man can't get inside me?
i'm a virgin and when my boyfriend and i have sex he cant get into me. i think it's because he's too gentle with me but could there be something wrong with me?

He might not be fully erect, he might be attempting approach from an incorrect angle, He might be incredibly endowed, its hard to say without more info.

I'd have him rub his unit down with lube (I like ForPlay® Gel-Plus™, but use whatever you like) and see if that doesn't help things greatly.

[Autumn]

I'm inclined to agree with Little and say maybe you're not ready. Maybe you should wait a while longer.
Or you might just be really tense due to nerves. As everyone else said foreplay. Try to relax and not worry too much.

[unwillingly_loved]

ok - maybe i skipped a few details

ladies, i think you may be right about the foreplay suggestions because once my guy is hard then he tries to go in - and i'm not wet yet.

Also, the trust thing? I trust him everywhere but the bedroom, because when we first started fooling around in there it was when he was going away for a long weekend. When he got back i found out from him that he had cheated on me - twice.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Did you say your still a Virgin? Honey if he went away for the weekend and cheated on you twice, that doesn't meant that because you are a virgin he has the right to get it from somewhere else as he wants, when he wants, especially seeing as you appear to be open to giving at least, so he should be honoured, proud and in love. It sounds to me that he likes sex, is having sexual relations, and is happy to take you there to. To me intercourse should be with much love. Sure, it helps if you know how to make it easier, comfortable and highly enjoyable, such as foreplay first, but it should be with love. I just would be worried if you did go down that path now, knowing he cheated and therefore, may do so again, and left him, then found a gorgeous guy who loved you so much, and you wish you waited for that guy instead. Feelings are strange things. I would hold of personally for a while and see how much this guy loves you, unless it is not an issue for you and you want to simply experience sex with this guy as you are ready, but if you have feelings, then hold on a while... You don't owe him anything just because he's doing it and you don't want a guy that cheats on you trust me...

[Dollface2008]

first of all when you have sex for the first time it hurts. and theres no way to really get around it. but if he cant get in at all he needs to finger you first always or get you warmed up before he tries to put himself in you hard especially if your a virgin. its not your fault its like that for everyone you really have to just man your way through your first time sometimes because its uncomftorble because your cherry is getting popped. but the little bit of pain and mild soreness after word is worth it to have sex in the future! with each time after the first it gets better! also try using water based lube for forplay leading up and for the actual game. good luck!

[unwillingly_loved]

nevermind, we broke up - he decided he'd probably just do it again so he dumped me. thanks for the info/help though!

[CHANDLERS WISH]

nevermind, we broke up - he decided he'd probably just do it again so he dumped me. thanks for the info/help though!

You know what, you'll thank him down the track when a guy comes along you really like and waits for you to be ready again and doesn't cheat on you...

It's actually a "grand" thing that he did that obviously you spoke to him about cheating and he knew he would keep doing it.

I'd be sitting pretty proud if i were you, you just managed to get a guy to not try to take away your virginity and keep sleeping around...

CW