[soldatka]

To be honest, if the guy is getting all the fun and you are not, then it isn't fair and it's not a very good start to a marriage. It may be the case that he is really too tired, but if he is a bit sore, why would he want oral sex? Your needs should be taken into consideration too. I would personally go on strike...or sit him down for a discussion on give-and-take in relationships.

[Just-a-regular-guy]

If nothing else....

Always remember 3 things...

1. Never stop talking to your mate
2. Never go to bed angry with one another
3. Never bite (hard) during oral sex

[C]

To me a blow job should be something special and not something that is expected all the time...By doing this you are replacing sex for what it is truly supposed to be....This being the joining of two bodies...When you started this and continued pleasing him like this he was training you. Now it is up to you to untrain him or else possibly spend a great deal of your sexual life like this....What you see is what you are going to get...

[CHANDLERS WISH]

soldakaTo be honest, if the guy is getting all the fun and you are not, then it isn't fair and it's not a very good start to a marriage. It may be the case that he is really too tired, but if he is a bit sore, why would he want oral sex? Your needs should be taken into consideration too. I would personally go on strike...or sit him down for a discussion on give-and-take in relationships.

That is a very good point re the sore bit?!?

And i totally agree, it is an equality share in a relationship not all one way or the way one person sees it, but how both people see it as one person...

Satisfying both needs what ever those needs are and desires, as that to me would be selfish if one made a judgement on when and how, as he has done.

You may very well have to sit him down and ask what he likes, truthfully how often and describe what you like, same... And work towards it.

There is no room for selfishness in togetherness sexually, it simply does not work.

CW

[Richard S]

That's a valid point. If a man has more than two or three orgasms in a short time span, he will feel "sore" because the sphincter muscle that controls ejaculation will feel overused. But that will happen equally whether the orgasm is coming from intercourse, oral, or masturbation. It's a lot like being female, in that it can feel sore and still feel good at the same time.

So, I don't understand that part of it either.

[hello_pitty]

Well I asked him last night, the "first part"...I Asked, Do you REALLY like my BJs? and he's like "yes, I love them, they feel so good and they drive me crazy"...okay so then he starts to ...um...get turned on...and I Was thinking, YES i'm gonna get laid tonight after a LONG day at work...but no, he said he wanted oral (he calls it a "lickin" lol), sigh....So I started but then I felt that I wanted it too!! So I slowly came up and started pulling his pants down, but he held them up and kind of grumbled and said "i'm too sore" ...So I just said "okay, i'm too tired to finish"...then I just lay down beside him and went to sleep....in tears.

****...I hope this IS just a phase and it passes SOON!! I'm 22, with NO kids...god!!!! I hate going to sleep horny!!!...maybe I REALLY do need a vibrator.

I just feel bad though, because I want it alot (not every single day) but more than once a week would be nice, like come on, I'm young and friggin horny!!! Sometimes, he will finger me if I ask him....but he never offers....

I think maybe i'll just cut him off and let him feel what I feel...oh and he said I could get a vibrator and he'd be fine with it....

[Fallen1]

What exactly does he mean he's to sore? His body is sore from work or his penis is sore?

I think it's time you had a good heart to heart conversation with him and let him know that this is not acceptable/fair for you.

[C]

You have gotten into a very bad pattern sexually....Whether you can break this and bring him back to where you were sexually will be much more than a challenge...He has gotten used to being the one that is pleasured and selfish about returning the favor...What you take into this marriage is what you will get...

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Is it possible that he has a problem there that he would feel un-comfortable to tell you where the stimulation of the BJ doesn't seem to hurt but the thrusting would?

I mean it may be a "boy thing" but it's the only think i can think of as you also stated that even though you "started" so he must have been "relaxed" the moment you went for the trousers he was "too sore"....

I mean when was the last time you saw him totally naked front on? If i can be bold.

Just a thought....

CW

[sarah_rsl]

I think it's just lazyness. Also I think theres something lacking in a man that doesn't want to satisfy their gf sexually and just wants to lay back and get blowjobs.

Most men love recieving oral sex, I've previously treated oral sex as just part of foreplay. In the past I've been with men that during sex when they'd seen that I had orgasamed would ask for oral sex so they could finish. This would usually suit me since it having sex after I'd orgasamed didn't really appeal to me.

Anyway in those cases it was two people working out how to satisfy each others sexual needs, which the guy in the original post doesn't seem to have any interest in.