[hornyallthetime]

just joined for some advice. i married a women 38 years ago who was a virgin at the time and never had an orgasm or never masturbated. After several years of good sex she finally had her first orgasm 5 years into our marriage. As life progressed and we had 2 kids grown and gone she has completed menapouse our sex life has rapidly deteriotated. She says she is just not a horny person and could go months without approaching me for sex or an orgasm. she says she doesnt masturbate at least not more than once every few months and for me to stop asking her about it she says it is a private thing. she wont let me go down on her or even touch her some times due to her self consciousness. at the end of my rope help please

[Ashlee T.]

It certainly sounds hormonal. She needs to speak with her doctor about working to balance her hormones now that she's gone through menopause. I know it is difficult to understand (especially for a man ) but when a woman's hormones are imbalanced, it can COMPLETELY remove any and all desire for sex or any physical affection that may lead to sex.

[atskitty2]

I agree that her hormones are probably playing a big part here.
Additionally however, what is the rest of the relationship like? What other ways are you both expressing intimacy and closeness? You said she's self-conscious about touching even-is she struggling with confidence/self-esteem issues?
Is she otherwise healthy, other than hormonal shifts associated with menopause?