[ArmandJeanDuPlessis]

Hi. I am 40 years old and I am still virgin. Never had a girlfriend. Actually, I've never kissed a woman. I am not ugly but socially awkward. But I don't want just sex. I want to find my life partner and a woman who doesn't judge me, but without any romantic and sexual experience it is really challenging to find a partner and I am really worried because I am not precisely a spring chicken and I don't want to get too old before finding love.

[Wednesday L.F.]

Have you tried any dating apps? There are alternative sites where folks tend to be more open minded about non-traditional dating—which might include you. FEELD is one but there are plenty more. To meet new people you gotta put yourself out there.

[ArmandJeanDuPlessis]

Have you tried any dating apps? There are alternative sites where folks tend to be more open minded about non-traditional dating—which might include you. FEELD is one but there are plenty more. To meet new people you gotta put yourself out there.

Yes. I am trying on dating apps but it's tough. I tried on FEELD but there is almost no people like me. I am more on the traditional side of things.

[jns]

Hi. I am 40 years old and I am still virgin. Never had a girlfriend. Actually, I've never kissed a woman. I am not ugly but socially awkward. But I don't want just sex. I want to find my life partner and a woman who doesn't judge me, but without any romantic and sexual experience it is really challenging to find a partner and I am really worried because I am not precisely a spring chicken and I don't want to get too old before finding love.

I was socially awkward, too, and a virgin in my mid twenties without having a girlfriend. Then I decided it was time to change things a bit. My first time having sex with a woman made me reexamine my life. I was laid off from my job a bit later but that was a good thing because it forced me to search for a new job and the new job had to include a lot more pay. In fact I found two new jobs. The first paid ok but the second paid even better and was enough to save up for buying a house. At the same time, I started going to Mexico where I found that the women there were closer to what I was looking for. After several girlfriends there that finally ended, I decided that I would go to Thailand, a dream since I was a teenager. I wasn't really looking for a girlfriend or a wife there, but that was what happened. The thing is that I never thought that Mexican women or Thai women were, as a group, more beautiful than other women, but the ones I met were beautiful in my eyes.

My suggestions are to change the circumstances you find yourself in. Travel widely to find more compatible women. Make sure that you have qualities that women will find attractive. Make sure you dress attractively enough. Maybe a haberdasher could help. Maybe go into a beauty salon and have the women there make you over so you look your best (kind of like myself going to a head hunter firm to adjust my resume and get my second job.) Make sure your hygiene is good including your oral hygiene and it is best to have at least reasonably straight teeth (I got my teeth straightened as an adult.)

I think that your expectations of the woman could be tightening the field so much that you will find a lot of failure before you find success. You note your age and even a woman ten years younger than you would be around 30. At that age most have had romance and/or sex before. Life experiences often shape compatibility and experience at romance and/or sex can help. Personally I never pursued a woman of college age because I believed that most people, men and women, of that age do not really know what they want. I believe that late 20s or 30s are better ages for a serious relationship that could lead to marriage. For me, what the woman did before me was not something I thought about. If we were going to have a full relationship, the only thing that was necessary was that the past relationships were firmly in the past.

Being judged by your partner is not bad as long as it is not harsh and it helps you grow in a more compatible direction. A true partner wants a better you.

[ArmandJeanDuPlessis]

I was socially awkward, too, and a virgin in my mid twenties without having a girlfriend. Then I decided it was time to change things a bit. My first time having sex with a woman made me reexamine my life. I was laid off from my job a bit later but that was a good thing because it forced me to search for a new job and the new job had to include a lot more pay. In fact I found two new jobs. The first paid ok but the second paid even better and was enough to save up for buying a house. At the same time, I started going to Mexico where I found that the women there were closer to what I was looking for. After several girlfriends there that finally ended, I decided that I would go to Thailand, a dream since I was a teenager. I wasn't really looking for a girlfriend or a wife there, but that was what happened. The thing is that I never thought that Mexican women or Thai women were, as a group, more beautiful than other women, but the ones I met were beautiful in my eyes.

My suggestions are to change the circumstances you find yourself in. Travel widely to find more compatible women. Make sure that you have qualities that women will find attractive. Make sure you dress attractively enough. Maybe a haberdasher could help. Maybe go into a beauty salon and have the women there make you over so you look your best (kind of like myself going to a head hunter firm to adjust my resume and get my second job.) Make sure your hygiene is good including your oral hygiene and it is best to have at least reasonably straight teeth (I got my teeth straightened as an adult.)

I think that your expectations of the woman could be tightening the field so much that you will find a lot of failure before you find success. You note your age and even a woman ten years younger than you would be around 30. At that age most have had romance and/or sex before. Life experiences often shape compatibility and experience at romance and/or sex can help. Personally I never pursued a woman of college age because I believed that most people, men and women, of that age do not really know what they want. I believe that late 20s or 30s are better ages for a serious relationship that could lead to marriage. For me, what the woman did before me was not something I thought about. If we were going to have a full relationship, the only thing that was necessary was that the past relationships were firmly in the past.

Being judged by your partner is not bad as long as it is not harsh and it helps you grow in a more compatible direction. A true partner wants a better you.

I can't travel because I am poor. Not extremely poor (I have my own house which in my country is a huge advantage ) but I have financial constraints. I don't care either what she did before me so long as she, as you said, keeps her past relationships firmly in the past and commits to be my life partner. I don't look for a virgin like me because it would reduce even more my dating pool but if I meet a virgin great!

[ArmandJeanDuPlessis]

Have you tried any dating apps? There are alternative sites where folks tend to be more open minded about non-traditional dating—which might include you. FEELD is one but there are plenty more. To meet new people you gotta put yourself out there.

I am trying FEELD but there are almost no people like me. A weird app.

[Gypsy malone]

Hi. I am 40 years old and I am still virgin. Never had a girlfriend. Actually, I've never kissed a woman. I am not ugly but socially awkward. But I don't want just sex. I want to find my life partner and a woman who doesn't judge me, but without any romantic and sexual experience it is really challenging to find a partner and I am really worried because I am not precisely a spring chicken and I don't want to get too old before finding love.

Have you seen the movie “40 year old virgin” ? Great movie.

[ArmandJeanDuPlessis]

Have you seen the movie “40 year old virgin” ? Great movie.

Yes. I have watched it a couple of times but nowadays it is not funny to me because it reminds me my own situation.