[HURT&CONFUSED]

AGAIN YOU ARE ALL GREAT!!!! Although I do believe he is my soul-mate I feel as though these desires that he has to explore his bi side are going to be overwhelming one day. He feels he could stop it at anytime but then there is always the pandora box theory. All I can do is figure it out with some serious soul searching. I have my identity, I know who I am, it is the confusion that I know he has that scares me. Some people are into the swinging lifestyle, so people have threesomes. Its like I said although he is so loyal and is willing to surpress these desires he has for our relationship is that really fair in the end? I want him to be truly happy and if he needs or wants to have men in his life to do it that I am ok with that, I just don't think it is what I want in my life forever. Unfortunately this is one of the first times that I cant or wont be able to be friends with an ex is so becomes. I never understood that before because I never truly loved, I know that now. I always wanted to be everyone's friend if the relationship didnt work and couldnt understand why the guys couldnt handle it. Now I know why. Cause I was never truly in love and they were, now I'm truly in love and if I do let him go to be free to find himself I know that will have to be the end because I dont think I could ever go back after letting him go explore if I wasnt a part of it. Since I dont know if that lifestyle is for me forever then maybe it is time to realize that I might have to say good bye. How the am I gonna do that? Now that is dramatic. LOL

[Ogre]

If letting him go is what you have to do in the end then know in your heart that there is a person out there for you. This may not be the man intended for you. It may be hard to see now but things will become clear. You are a strong person and will get through it. Pain will come. But it will also go.

[HURT&CONFUSED]

Its amazing and I am glad that I found this site. I no longer have to worry about how I feel because it is over. He may be my soul-mate but as many know we dont always get to be with our soul-mates and hopefully there is more than one out there. About a year ago I asked him to move out for awhile. We were separated but still together exclusive or so I thought. He was still at my house almost every night. It was as though he never left except his stuff was moved or some of it. Well he moved more than just his stuff. Got trashed one night and decided he was going to figure out if he wanted to be with a guy with me involved or without. He says it was to check himself if the turn on was about the him or us doing something together. Never the less. He gave the guy a BJ and the guy insisted on trying to give him one back but it didnt work for my boyfriend. He's not into that part, he mostly wanted to try to give a BJ so he did. Without me and as far as I am concerned soul searching or not it wasnt part of what we agreed on and he went outside the arrangement so its done. Who knows what the to do now. Its just a heart, I guess if Drs can replace them mine will heal one day too. Thanks everyone for all the help. There are no more questions about whether to stay or not. Maybe this will help others that have questions about loving someone who is bi that says they want to include you and make it part of something that is only done together. They dont, they will probably cheat and satisfy themselves without their significant other. Thanks again everyone. I truly appreciate it. I love this site though so will probably stay on it. Have a great day.

[anonymouswhitefemale]

It's a shame to see another sign that society is not ready for bisexual males, and that they can never be in a happy relationship.

Though yeah, he cheated, that's what it boils down to.

[SorridLives]

......Who knows what the to do now. Its just a heart, I guess if Drs can replace them mine will heal one day too. Thanks everyone for all the help. There are no more questions about whether to stay or not. Maybe this will help others that have questions about loving someone who is bi that says they want to include you and make it part of something that is only done together. They dont, they will probably cheat and satisfy themselves without their significant other. Thanks again everyone. I truly appreciate it. I love this site though so will probably stay on it. Have a great day.

So sorry that happened to you. {{{Hug}}} It's corny and old,- but better to have loved and lost, they say.

[SorridLives]

It's a shame to see another sign that society is not ready for bisexual males, and that they can never be in a happy relationship.

Though yeah, he cheated, that's what it boils down to.

I really don't think that bi males can "never be happy". I think they have to be more upfront and pick a partner that is more open to a relationship with a bisexual person. I am not sure that all people "pick" who they fall in love with, but by being honest from day one, a bi person has the best shot at happiness, IMO.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I really don't think that bi males can "never be happy". I think they have to be more upfront and pick a partner that is more open to a relationship with a bisexual person. I am not sure that all people "pick" who they fall in love with, but by being honest from day one, a bi person has the best shot at happiness, IMO.

I totally agree, once you "fall in love" you have to battle your feelings, as well as the situation at hand and whether you "can or cannot accept that particular situation - Bi".

I don't think people should be playing "God, or on a wim that if he/she loves me I have a chance that they will accept"...

HURT& CONFUSED

He has "tried" to supress for you, he loved/loves you... But, he was unable to do so, when he saw a "green light" the one that said, "technically we are not together" knowingly that in reality you both were, really if half of his things were still there and he spent nearly every night with you, so there Anon is correct, cheating is still cheating and it obviously regardless of your love, remains in your mind, 1 year later...

I always think that when "feelings" take over of doubt, they manifest eventually to a point where you just don't feel the same way, you view them as a person instead of your "soul-mate" and decisions are much easier to work with.

You better believe that there is more than one Soul-Mate out there

What is a Soul-Mate? Total compatibility? You just click in ever single way? Feel like you have known them all your life?

If there is such a thing as "after-life and re-incarnation" then there are many souls here that you knew in your past lives and there are reasons we meet up with "souls" he may not necessarily be your "soul mate" rather a SOUL that you were meant to meet in this life.

CW

[Ogre]

I am sorry that is the way things ended for you...

[HURT&CONFUSED]

Thanks everybody. Its not that I couldn't deal with him being bi. Its that I felt bad for him that he couldnt even really admit it to himself. Its obvious like you said that as soon as he thought he had a green light that he ran for it. Who knows how many times. Now I dont even know what was real except that I love him. I just feel that cheating is cheating and it goes back to the fact that if his "fantasy" was to be able to be with another guy with me as a threesome yet he went and did it on his own, its exactly what I was afraid of. Where would the boundaries have been. We never broke up he just partially moved out and bam, there he went. I'm a wreck and this is probably getting old. My brain is just fried with all of this and I have this huge hole in my heart that just aches. Thanks again to all of you. I guess it's time to start a new post cause everybody has got to be sick of hearing about this. Why cant people just be honest? I was so accepting to all of it, we talked about it all the time, I offered to participate. It was fine and now, what a mess. I wish him the best and hope he finds what he is looking for because to be honest I dont know that he will ever find another girl like me that was willing to accept all of his sexual confusion. Maybe he will. Either way I wish him the best and hope he finds happiness. As for me, I just hope to not always compare everyone in the future to him cause he really was it for me and I thought he felt the same. I still think he does but the cheating is too much. Hope you are all well.

[SorridLives]

Thanks everybody. Its not that I couldn't deal with him being bi. Its that I felt bad for him that he couldnt even really admit it to himself. Its obvious like you said that as soon as he thought he had a green light that he ran for it. Who knows how many times. Now I dont even know what was real except that I love him. I just feel that cheating is cheating and it goes back to the fact that if his "fantasy" was to be able to be with another guy with me as a threesome yet he went and did it on his own, its exactly what I was afraid of.....

{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}} I can sympathize with your pain. Cheating is very hurtful. I think you are doing the right thing though. Maybe someday (though it doesn't seem like it now), you can be friends. You will always care about him....and I am sure he cares about you.