The one you never get over..
I need some advice and I'm trying to figure out how to make a long story short. I am 20 years old and have been out of high school for 3 years. During my sophomore year of high school I met a guy who is a year younger than me and since we've met things have been very on and off with us. All during high school we pretty much dated only each other and we had the best times together, we were nerdy together, we didn't fight and being with him was so easy. When I graduated things changed I was leaving and he was staying so things ended and he started dating someone else and so did I. We were both in these relationships for about 2 years and our relationships ended right around the same time. During those 2 years we would see each other once in a while and talk once in a while and I still felt really connected to him. I think I should also mention that during the course of his 2 year relationship he got his girlfriend pregnant and he now has a 2 year old son.
We both got out of our relationships last June and within a month or 2 of those break ups we were nearly inseperable. We talked constantly and to me if felt like we were in a relationship together so after 4 months of not knowing exactly where things stood I finally just came out and asked him what was going on between us. He said he really did care about me, but that he didn't want to rush into a relationship and that between his full-time job and taking care of his son he was worried about not being able to fully commit to a serious relationship and give me what I deserved. I was a little sad, but I understood I would never expect him to put me above his son. Things carried on like this until last December. December had been a really great month for us, I really felt like he was ready to commit and I'm friends with his best friends and they thought so as well until he through as all for a loop and ended up getting back together with his baby mama.
I was absolutely crushed, when I finally got him to talk to me about it he was just plain mean and told me that we couldn't talk anymore because he wanted to really try and make things work with girlfriend. As angry as I was I told him good luck and walked away, but I thought about him constantly, I tried to date other guys, I kept myself busy, didn't help because in the back of my mind I was waiting for the day when things with him and his ex would be over, which everyone was counting on they just weren't right for each other. One random day I got a text from him and he told me how unhappy he was and he was sorry for the things he said and did and that he was just trying to be a good dad and give his son a happy family, but that he realized he wasn't handling it right and that he missed me and though about me constantly and that he was leaving his girlfriend...and 4 days later he did leave her.
I was really happy but I didn't want to scare him away by trying to rush a relationship on him or anything so I chilled out to see what he would do, and a day after their split he invited me over to watch a movie and for 2 weeks following that i was staying at his house almost every night at his request. And then one night I went to his house just to say hi for a few minutes and he asked what I was doing the rest of the night and since it was St. Pattys day I told him I was going to a friends party for a little a bit, and he was just really quite so I left. We didn't talk much the next couple of days and out of no where he said "this is like out first fight" which I didn't realize we were fighting and he never bothered to explain what he meant, and through the course of the next month we talked less and less until the last 2 weeks I've been hearing a lot from him and we've hung out and he says he misses me, and his friends ask why we don't just wake up and realize we should be together.
And I don't know what to tell them. I'm normally good at reading people, but I never know exactly what hes thinking. My family thinks hes scared to be in a relationship, but I don't know. I just wish I could figure out if he see relationship potential with me or if he thinks we're just friends, so that I can try to move on once and for all. I worry though that if we never really give it shot, I'll be wondering for the rest of my life, what if?
Sorry I know this was long, I'm not good at making stories short. Any thoughts on the situation?
We both got out of our relationships last June and within a month or 2 of those break ups we were nearly inseperable. We talked constantly and to me if felt like we were in a relationship together so after 4 months of not knowing exactly where things stood I finally just came out and asked him what was going on between us. He said he really did care about me, but that he didn't want to rush into a relationship and that between his full-time job and taking care of his son he was worried about not being able to fully commit to a serious relationship and give me what I deserved. I was a little sad, but I understood I would never expect him to put me above his son. Things carried on like this until last December. December had been a really great month for us, I really felt like he was ready to commit and I'm friends with his best friends and they thought so as well until he through as all for a loop and ended up getting back together with his baby mama.
I was absolutely crushed, when I finally got him to talk to me about it he was just plain mean and told me that we couldn't talk anymore because he wanted to really try and make things work with girlfriend. As angry as I was I told him good luck and walked away, but I thought about him constantly, I tried to date other guys, I kept myself busy, didn't help because in the back of my mind I was waiting for the day when things with him and his ex would be over, which everyone was counting on they just weren't right for each other. One random day I got a text from him and he told me how unhappy he was and he was sorry for the things he said and did and that he was just trying to be a good dad and give his son a happy family, but that he realized he wasn't handling it right and that he missed me and though about me constantly and that he was leaving his girlfriend...and 4 days later he did leave her.
I was really happy but I didn't want to scare him away by trying to rush a relationship on him or anything so I chilled out to see what he would do, and a day after their split he invited me over to watch a movie and for 2 weeks following that i was staying at his house almost every night at his request. And then one night I went to his house just to say hi for a few minutes and he asked what I was doing the rest of the night and since it was St. Pattys day I told him I was going to a friends party for a little a bit, and he was just really quite so I left. We didn't talk much the next couple of days and out of no where he said "this is like out first fight" which I didn't realize we were fighting and he never bothered to explain what he meant, and through the course of the next month we talked less and less until the last 2 weeks I've been hearing a lot from him and we've hung out and he says he misses me, and his friends ask why we don't just wake up and realize we should be together.
And I don't know what to tell them. I'm normally good at reading people, but I never know exactly what hes thinking. My family thinks hes scared to be in a relationship, but I don't know. I just wish I could figure out if he see relationship potential with me or if he thinks we're just friends, so that I can try to move on once and for all. I worry though that if we never really give it shot, I'll be wondering for the rest of my life, what if?
Sorry I know this was long, I'm not good at making stories short. Any thoughts on the situation?
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