[tesoro]

I'm newly single (separated) and I still don't feel like I'm ready to start dating. I have very limited experience with dating because I married my high school sweetheart and now, in our 40's we have split up.

My daughter has a friend whose dad is divorced. He has been very kind to me since the split and has offered to lend an ear. I have kept the details to a minimum but have found him easy to talk to and very thoughtful.

The strange thing is that before we met, over the phone he mentioned that he had a girlfriend. We went out for lunch once and since meeting me, he hasn't mentioned his girlfriend to me again.

He will call me once in a while to see how I'm doing and to ask if I've started dating yet and he will make off the cuff remarks about getting together to discuss our daughters' report cards and things like that. Recently, he asked me if I'd like to go skiing with him and a bunch of his daughter's friends (my daughter was also invited).

I'm just not certain if he is being kind or if he is interested in me and - if he is interested in me, what are his intentions? I guess time will tell but I almost want to ask him about his girlfriend.

I feel like a teen here, but does anyone want to help me speculate about where this fella is going with all of this?

[sofi-chan]

Well keep talking with him and ask what happend with his gf... then if he is intrested in you, you should let your daughter know because he is her friend's dad (this if ur daughter is 9+)...

[CHANDLERS WISH]

That's hard mam...

Firstly he's a gentleman as he clearly let you know, have no fear, I have a girlfriend....Therefore, he had no reason to again bring her up at your lunch.

He could want to get you out, knowing your still hybernating, as you say, he only contacts you once in a while, or he may no longer have the girlfriend is interested and makes safe plans where others are involved, so that he can get to know you more, you him..

Either way accept, you need to get out ......

CW

[WildChild]

Don't worry about it. Keep it light and freindly. It's not like he's asked you to be his orgy partner.

[tesoro]

LOL!! Good points ladies....I will wait and see what develops and then let you know.

[hppacific]

well idk if this is an option but why not ask him if he has a gf??? LOL just nonchalantly bring it up. not out right "are you single" hahaha but you never know like you said he could be single now and if u like him and arent opposed to the idea of dating again why not take a shot? even if u don't want to date i agree with everyone else that you need to get out of the house and enjoy your time with someone. there's no sense in (as CW put it) hybernating in your house because from personal experience i've learned that kind of leads to depression. ya know go out and have fun!!! =] and if things between you two do progress i think it would probably be a good idea to talk to your daughter about it best of luck =]

[oxyear]

i also want to say this hard to tell but i want you realise that every men need sex all the time.... or maybe he just feel lonely just need someone to talk to do things with. But one thing Do not give to him 100% if not you will be sad...

Choose man wisely!!!

[WildChild]

i also want to say this hard to tell but i want you realise that every men need sex all the time.... or maybe he just feel lonely just need someone to talk to do things with. But one thing Do not give to him 100% if not you will be sad...

Choose man wisely!!!

Men do not need sex all the time. Some men have high sex drives, some have very low sex drives and most are somewhere in the middle - Just like women. The trick is finding a partner who wants what you want and wants to see you pleasured and happy.

[tesoro]

OK girls, here's the scoop...

Went on the ski trip and had a lot of fun, good conversation, laughs etc. The fella was very charming and entertaining, especially after a few drinks at the bar after the girls had gone to bed. On the way back to our hotel rooms, he stops at my door and leans against the wall almost as if he was waiting to be invited in...

I didn't invite him in but I was quite tipsy after several beers...lol...so I kissed him on the cheek and smiled goodnight.

He comes knocking on my door about a half hour later wrapped in a robe and starts to make the moves on me. I then proceed to tell him that I like him...BUT...I am aware he is not free and single and I can't possible fool around with a man who is commited to someone else.

He tells me that he is very attracted to me and that he doesn't even know if he loves his girlfriend (couldn't believe it)...I said I'm sorry but I just don't feel comfortable under the circumstances...he gives me a hug and a kiss and then leaves the room...phew!

I'm proud of the way I handled it but was very surprised at how he behaved....I guess all men have one thing on their minds....SEX!!!!!!

[jns]

I'm proud of the way I handled it but was very surprised at how he behaved....I guess all men have one thing on their minds....SEX!!!!!!

Many men may have sex on their mind, but most would not have been such a cad.