[Maximus]

Having had so many sexual encounters with women, and how ever many dates, what all that taught you about women ?
What lessons have you taken of all these experiences ?

Wanting is one thing, being ready is another...and not being ready is not a bad thing neither.
Blossoming late in a great relationship is irrelevant since it's not a race.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I think I'm fiending for a gf so bad that I'm trying to rush into something. Maybe I'm being to nice and to honest about my past?

Simply put? Your cocky..You say your good in bed, well 100 girls, probably You say your good looking, have a car, job, etc, and you say, you tell them about the women, but probably you tell them more as well, so they way that up, and say, yeah, na, he's a player, he loves himself....

Wait

Having had so many sexual encounters with women, and how ever many dates, what all that taught you about women ?
What lessons have you taken of all these experiences ?

Wanting is one thing, being ready is another...and not being ready is not a bad thing neither.
Blossoming late in a great relationship is irrelevant since it's not a race.

Re-read this...

It's good that you now are ready for a relationship...It's good that you see the maturity in yourself and in woman, it has to be hard to have spent 3 years playing and now wanting to be serious, how do you do that? What do you say?

It makes perfect sense why you came here...

I think you have to view a woman now from the "inside" and you have to view yourself from the "inside" and quit looking on the outside, of them and of you if you want to succeed

When questioned, they probably want to hear 4 year relationship, she cheated so they can go aweee, and fall for you...

But lying is not good.

However, you have a car a job, simply state you could have had relationships, you chose not to, you have been concentrating on career, although you've been approached a fair bit, you weren't ready, you did fall for one lady that you entered into a relationship with, but it wasn't the right timing for you... Now however your looking for a relationship in the right direction, with laughter, fun and one that is real..

CW

[Guest]

Having had so many sexual encounters with women, and how ever many dates, what all that taught you about women ?
What lessons have you taken of all these experiences ?

Wanting is one thing, being ready is another...and not being ready is not a bad thing neither.
Blossoming late in a great relationship is irrelevant since it's not a race.

I've learned to never believe a girl right away. They are a lot better at lying and hiding things than guys. The ones that seem so innocent and believable can be the worst. A girl will drop a guy so fast. That's why I never ever put my heart or emotions into anything when I was a .

I know deep down I'm ready for a girlfriend but I'm not sure how to tell when the girls different than the rest

[Guest]

Chandlers wish - are you saying to just let it happen? Don't go out searching for anything? Lol, yeah I'm cocky and ill tell you why. I didn't talk to ANY girls in high school and didn't realize what I had until I graduated. I found out real fast that girls like a guy with self confidence so that's where it originated. I'm not arrogant, don't think that. I just think I'm doing ok for myself and look decent. I don't want any of y'all to think I'm some cocky with girls, far from that.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Lol's well at least you realise what I'm saying that's a start

Way yeah even at my age, confidence is "everything" it's how my fiance scored me.....

I'm saying, a woman likes confidence, she does not like a player

I'm saying, what you have use it to your favour but don't show you know you've got it...

And, I'm saying, if you know you've got things going for you, then be confident, not cocky, your approaching a different age group and they have already been played, they want to know they are safe, have a confident good looking, skinny guy who they find out is also good in bed Because, he's confident..not cocky and your past is your past remember that...You own it, no need to discuss it until your smitten with someone and they you and you've been together a long time then they will see, that you changed, fell for them and it becomes, aweee factor.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I've learned to never believe a girl right away. They are a lot better at lying and hiding things than guys. The ones that seem so innocent and believable can be the worst. A girl will drop a guy so fast. That's why I never ever put my heart or emotions into anything when I was a .

I know deep down I'm ready for a girlfriend but I'm not sure how to tell when the girls different than the rest

I'm not answering for my soul friend here He will do that but we are on the same path...

Wrong.... trust is important, lies, people telling them, they are not worth knowing, don't go further....next.

Take your time to get to know someone...words are words.

Well she will if you showed something and then showed something else, like strength then weakness

Heart and emotions are worthy of those worthy to be given to

You need to learn the word "deep" nothing wrong with being you, and it takes time to find what your looking for be you..Nothing ever than you.

You'll know if you look "inside" and not on the outside...

Virgle, please add

[Maximus]

Chandlers wish - are you saying to just let it happen? Don't go out searching for anything? Lol, yeah I'm cocky and ill tell you why. I didn't talk to ANY girls in high school and didn't realize what I had until I graduated. I found out real fast that girls like a guy with self confidence so that's where it originated. I'm not arrogant, don't think that. I just think I'm doing ok for myself and look decent. I don't want any of y'all to think I'm some cocky with girls, far from that.

Hello Sehtx,

Thank you for honest response !
Very appreciated.

The mechanics of relationships are so that they are miles of books on the subject.
The fact of the matter is it's about chemistry.
Chemistry of choices, views, timing, souls connection.
The last is particularly important because it requires you to be truthful, sometimes bluntly honest, but always just.
Confidence is important, but should not overrated neither.
You have dated enough that what you put forward is what you will get.

With time, I came to understand men and women only get the partners they deserve.
And this includes all the things they have put or didn't put in the encounter.

Actually I am going to share something personal.
I remained "virgin" until I was 26, not by choice, but because I just couldn't find any girl who "wanted" me.
All changed until I met that first woman, with whom I grew so much, and to whom I am forever grateful.

If there was a recipe, I would say always speaking from your heart is the key, no matter what.

[LanaBear]

Chandlers wish - are you saying to just let it happen? Don't go out searching for anything? Lol, yeah I'm cocky and ill tell you why. I didn't talk to ANY girls in high school and didn't realize what I had until I graduated. I found out real fast that girls like a guy with self confidence so that's where it originated. I'm not arrogant, don't think that. I just think I'm doing ok for myself and look decent. I don't want any of y'all to think I'm some cocky with girls, far from that.

Ahhh, but don't mistake a like for self confidence as the same like for cockiness. Being cocky and having self confidence are two entirely different things. Yes, we like men who have confidence, who carry themselves well, men who just have it. What we don't like are men who have to overly talk about conquests, men who "brag" about money, cars, women, etc., because THOSE are the men who we generally see as lacking that self confidence that we like. Why else are they trying so hard to talk about why you should like them?

Get what I'm saying?

So, lose the cockiness, but keep the self confidence. It will get you a lot farther with women.

[WildChild]

Honestly, I never wanted a gf until recently. I don't know if I'm growing up or what it is but I'm tired of messing around with random girls

This is good. You are maturing and recognizing that is its not just about sex, its about connection and shared experience.

Just to give you an idea what women think when they hear that a man has had a lot of partners, a while back I was talking to a male aquaintence who is just a few years older than I (over 50). He made a remark that he has had over a 1000 women. He was trying to make a point that he has a lot of experience and knew what he was talking about. It fell flat with me. I looked him right in the eye and said, "Why? Are you that bad at it?" He is a talker and that left him jaw dropped and speachless.

You do have some learning to do. Its one thing to get a woman who is on the prowl into bed with you, its quite another to keep a woman happily in your life. Take it easy, take time to get to know her, take some time getting into bed with her - but not too long - you do need to be sexually compatible. Its all about balance.

[Guest]

Thank you everyone. I feel a little smarter after reading everything and getting everyones opinions. I think I'm going to just take a step back and let destiny find me a girlfriend. I'm not in a rush but I'm going to be a happy guy when I find someone that really cares about me and vice versa. I guess I can enjoy the bachelor life until then