[caster]

If something happened to my wife I would consider a relationship like this. Since I wouldn't want to go straight into another LTR I wouldn't have a problem offering an incentive to the right woman to be available. Beats being alone.
If may be prostitution, it may be pandering, it may be just be friends with benefits, either way as long as they are consenting I don't see a problem.

Or, like the young woman told the older man at the bar, "I'll do anything you ask for $100"
He slips her his address and says come over in an hour. An hour later she shows up and he takes her to the bedrooms and says; "There's the paint, rollers and brushes, drop cloths are on the floor..."

[Little]

Have you looked into the tax ramifications of this income?

[amy37]

Find out his secrets. I doubt he's letting you know everything you should, especially if he lives or constantly travels to a different country, he's probably married.

men like to play it off like they are really busy in life, but what's really happening is that they have a double life, so it's a good excuse to not include you in it.

[DreamP346]

When entering into this, think of it as a business relationship. Some things to consider:

1) Will you sign a contract with a clause about advance warning and how long he will continue to pay you when he decides to end the relationship. This is like working as a freelancer. The money is good but there is no security. You are at his mercy. If he decides to suddently stop the relationship, you may have developed a lifestyle for the money he has been providing which suddenly ends. Think long term - what would happen if he ends the relationship and you are in the middle of school. Can you afford your lifestyle.

2) Will he pay for your apartment? If so, whose name will the lease be under? If its his, then he can kick you out at any time. If its your's, you need to make sure you can still pay for it if he doesn't give you money that month.

3) Is he giving you cash? If so, that can have tax implications. Don't quote me on this, but in the US anything over $10000 in gifts is considered taxable.

4) Make sure you thoroughly research this guy. Do a background check to make sure he is not a criminal. Do a credit check to make sure he really does have money. Make sure you get money/gifts regularly. What will you do if next month he says he is short on cash or "forgets" to put money in the account.

5) Make sure you live within your current means. The extra money you get will be nice, but don't change your lifestyle to depend on it. Remember, the relationship could end anytime and you will have to pay with your current salary.

6) Clearly define what is expected. More that just saying "more than just sex". Be clear on what types of sex, the use of protection (remember what Harmany said about a girl at each port), friends, family, etc. Define if you can date/have sex with other people.

Think of every possiblity clearly and reason it out. Make sure you are protected both physically and financially. Make sure you always have control over the situation. Emotions may or may not get involved. Like any relationship in life, anything is possible. You may fall in love with your co-worker you say hi to once a day or you may live with a man for 10 years and never love him. Just be prepared for whatever may happen and think how you would react in those situation. What happens if he falls in love and wants to move the relationship to the next level but you don't or vice versa. What if you meet somebody else and want to terminate this current relationship. Would both of you be OK with that? There are so many complicated possibilities. Just sort them out in advance. This can definitely be something you can use to your advantage. If he is older and richer, then most likely he is much more experienced with dealing with business and thinking these types of things through, compared to you. So you really need to do your research and educate yourself so you have just as much power in this relationship.

good luck

[Calicorado83]

Thanks for the responses!

I don't plan on adjusting my lifestyle to fit with the money he will be giving me. I plan on using it to pay off some debts first, that way if he does happen to end the relationship, I will have less expenses that my current salary is used for, and ultimately I can afford the things I want on my own.

I appreciate the advice sp346 gave above, but I dont want to overcomplicate the situation with credit checks and contracts. He and I are both looking for an easy uncomplicated arrangement that benefits each other. If he decides one day he doesn't want to pay me, then he loses the companionship and sex he would e gotten based on just that.

There's really no way for me to find out if he has a second relationship/wife. If it was girls in other ports, I really don't care. If it was a wife I would. But Ive already asked him and he said he was divorced. He also offered to fly me out to Cali for the weekend. I doubt he would do that if he had a family to hide me from. If I do suspect something I would confront, but until I am suspicious or have reason, I'm not going to annoy him.

[Trisha23]

If you are happy with that kind of relationship and with that kind of setup, then I don't see any problem with that.

[Pollon]

Here are the potential problems I see.

1) He is offering money not only to stay out of a "relationship" but to end it with no guilt. I believe Charlie Sheen said regarding prostitutes, "I don't pay them for sex, I pay them to leave." As CW pointed out, some kind of bond will likely develop between you two. I think it is more difficult than many people think not to develop some emotional attachment when engaging in an ongoing sexual relationship--doubly so for women. If and when he ends the relationship--possibly with no warning-- and leaves you hurting, it will be very hard not to feel like you were nothing but a prostitute to him.

2) Unless you are prepared to keep this big of a secret from some future mate, one day you will have to explain this relationship. And no matter how you dress this up with conditions, rationalizations and justifications it boils down to a "relationship" in exchange for money. Sure there are guys out there who really wouldn't care, but there are plenty of men who wouldn't have anything to do with a women who could do that. And even if a guy would date you after this, he might have some nagging doubts about the foundation of his relationship with you.

So my concern for you isn't so much about getting into this relationship, it is what happens to you after it is over. Would you be proud of the way in which you chose to deal with your financial situation? And once you've dipped your toe in the pool, what's next? There is plenty of money to be made out there for women who are willing to jump all the way in. Could you resist?

Good luck

[CHANDLERS WISH]

If it was girls in other ports, I really don't care.

Hate to ask ...................But, are you using protection? Because if there are girls in other ports and more than likely there is, if not a wife and lets face it he has money, so off course he can be anywhere on weekends without the wife, then you are taking OTHER risks, that could prove fatal if not un-comfortable...

Also, I need to ask, are you grieving over the loss of your boyfriend? Is this anger, pftttt men, stuff it, I am sick of being hurt so I might as well do this without emotions...

Just remembering all you gave in relationships petal

[rcoreyus]

As long as you are honest with yourself about what sort of relationship this is, the it can be fine. Just be sure not to fool yourself into thinking it is somehting that it is not.

[LisaW1991]

I have a friend who has relationship like this. She is 20 and he is 45 (I think). He is kinda rich and he has taken her on all kinds of vacations she could never afford. She likes him, but does not love him. She says she does enjoy having sex with him, so why not travel with him and do stuff. She did tell me that if he didn't take her places, she wouldn't be having sex with him, but thinks having sex with him is a great way for them both to get what they want. He wants sex with a younger girl, and she like to travel all over the world. And she says, it kinda cool to have sex in in different places like Japan, India, China, England, etc, etc.

I don't think I could trade sex for doing things or getting things, but I never had a rich guy make me tempting offer. I have had sex wtih older guys who were kinda rich, but it wasn't trading sex to get something in return. I just like them, but I do think they wanted to have sex with a girl much younger...hehehe.