[miffed23]

because the day i wrote what i did,
i realized how i was.. and how much even though deep down inside i knew he isn't going to be with me.....i couldn't leave him. So i tried to leave this world.
I drank a bottle of rubbing alcohol, and a new bottle of Midol .. thats about a lot of pills.
I had a cardiac attack and was saved just in time..

Its hard to express feelings on here, but i am truely heartbroken and lost for words by your story.

I also dont feel like i can add anything that others havent said, except that ending your precious life isnt a way out... someone very special to me once told me that 'whatever you dont settle and accomplish in 'this' life, youll only have to face again in another.'

You will get through this.

[Franciz84]

A MAN WHO CHEATS ON HIS WIFE WITH YOU WILL
CHEAT ON YOU

Its true...
If he cheated before, he MIGHT cheat on you TOO...

[Joy]

Lost i hope you are doing well today. I know you love this man and you think he was truthful but he wasn't. I would bet the farm that he had patched things up but kept things going with you since his gf was out of country. You don't get forced into proposing to someone and getting engaged. He seems like an opprotunist his fiance could have more political power, money or whatever. He is getting married to gain something. He uses your heart and pity for gain "I have no choice" We all have the power of choice.

That does not deminish your greatness because true greatness comes from within it is not something that is external that can be purchased. You have lived thru this pain and its who you are after that experience that matters. You will get better and stronger each day.

You need to face that fear of abdonment to strengthen yourself so you are not suseptible for opprotunistic people that will cross your path in life.

CW, Miffed and everyone else is right your own life is worth so much more. You would leave a big hole in so many peoples lives if you took your own. Love yourself everyday have compassion and forgiveness for youself as you would for anyone else.

[Lostwithoutyou081280]

Hello everyone,
I'm back it's been over a year now.... and i have great news. I left him.

I left the " love of my life" as i reffered to him.

I am now in a healthier and much more confortable relationship with a man i meant at school. He's very loving, and caring.
I just thought i'd share how much i'm thankful for all of your support. Now if only i can change my username to strongerwithyou.

[WildChild]

It's great to hear that you have broken away and are healing. May I suggest an even better name?
Stonginmyself.

That is what you should be working toward. Your true happiness is increased by being in a loving relationship but should not depend upon it.

[Lostwithoutyou081280]

oh oops i meant to write strongerwithoutyou. but thank you for the suggestion if only i could figure out how tochange my screen name.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Aweee good for you...

You can't change your screen name sweet....... You can make your signature bolder though and in colour ........

CW

[starbright]

He will not leave his wife for you and if he does, then he will cheat on you as well. If you're questioning his trustworthiness then it's not even worth wasting your time with this man. Love yourself enough to find someone who will be fully committed to you.
I hope your situation works out.

[Little]

Hooray! I love to see people come back with happy updates. Congratulations!

[Ahryin]

I just wanted to add to the CONGRATSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!