[atskitty2]

I'm not sure what you took from my words that your interpretation is that being kind and respectful is showing a lack of confidence. That isn't what I meant. I reread my post and not sure what reads that way. Can you specify so I can clear up the confusion?

I don't have time to comment further at this time, so I'll revisit this later.

[Popcorn&Candy]

You sound like a wonderful, kind, respectful and caring person: never change. The right woman will love this about you and won't see you as being weak or anything like that. Carry on being yourself and the right woman will fall head over heels for you.

[Jack101]

So, "being weak on them" can be a real turn-off early on. It doesn't make you weak, it indicates inexperience many times, or lack of self-awareness. And lack of confidence...some women may find that appealing, depending on what their objectives are in a relationship.

This, and sorry if i missunderstood, english is not my native language so its hard to understand everything :P

[Jack101]

You sound like a wonderful, kind, respectful and caring person: never change. The right woman will love this about you and won't see you as being weak or anything like that. Carry on being yourself and the right woman will fall head over heels for you.

But what if i dont want to be myself, i think thats the problem, i want to change myself from good to worse :/

[atskitty2]

I had wondered briefly if you weren't from here...

Maybe I should back up the discussion, ask you to explain what it means to "be weak" on a girl?

[Jack101]

I had wondered briefly if you weren't from here...

Maybe I should back up the discussion, ask you to explain what it means to "be weak" on a girl?

My explanation is next, being weak on a girl basically means you put her needs in front of your own, you constantly think about her and ask yourself how is she. Brief explanation but thats preety much it :P

[atskitty2]

What's your first language, and where are you from, if you don't mind sharing?

[atskitty2]

Well, I think that early on, in any relationship, you should probably NOT be too "weak" on someone. Until the relationship has developed into something more relevant, constantly thinking about her, putting her needs ahead of yours, is probably not the healthiest approach. And even then, constantly thinking of someone, is not healthy. Putting a partner's needs above our own is a great characteristic to have, but self-care is still very important. There's a very important boundary there, with our own needs, and the needs of a partner. We cannot always be so giving, that our own needs aren't met. If a partner is not also a giver, it can become a very one-sided partnership, in which the person doing all the giving becomes exhausted and feels taken advantage of.

Most independent people do not like "neediness". If you are constantly thinking of and contacting someone, it can be perceived as needing a lot of attention. I'm not suggesting you are needy, as I don't know that, but it can be perceived as this when a person doesn't know you well.

Depending on your cultural background, these may be quite different. This is my opinion. If you are living in the US, or a Westernized culture, and intend to stay here, dating, this is an important quality to develop, without changing who you are. Just relax a bit, let things move along at a more natural pace. Dating is difficult, and even more so, when you're coming at it with a different background, and language barrier.

Now, if you don't mind, please explain what you've understood me to say. I want to be sure we don't miscommunicate and misunderstand each other again!

[Jack101]

What's your first language, and where are you from, if you don't mind sharing?

No problem, i m serbian :P
Basically you probobaly know what balkan men are, most of them are considered alpha(although like primitives). Due to my physicall looks people expect from me(especially the girls i attract) to act like that, to act like a primitive jerk and tbf i really cant pull that off

[Jack101]

Well, I think that early on, in any relationship, you should probably NOT be too "weak" on someone. Until the relationship has developed into something more relevant, constantly thinking about her, putting her needs ahead of yours, is probably not the healthiest approach. And even then, constantly thinking of someone, is not healthy. Putting a partner's needs above our own is a great characteristic to have, but self-care is still very important. There's a very important boundary there, with our own needs, and the needs of a partner. We cannot always be so giving, that our own needs aren't met. If a partner is not also a giver, it can become a very one-sided partnership, in which the person doing all the giving becomes exhausted and feels taken advantage of.

Most independent people do not like "neediness". If you are constantly thinking of and contacting someone, it can be perceived as needing a lot of attention. I'm not suggesting you are needy, as I don't know that, but it can be perceived as this when a person doesn't know you well.

Depending on your cultural background, these may be quite different. This is my opinion. If you are living in the US, or a Westernized culture, and intend to stay here, dating, this is an important quality to develop, without changing who you are. Just relax a bit, let things move along at a more natural pace. Dating is difficult, and even more so, when you're coming at it with a different background, and language barrier.

Now, if you don't mind, please explain what you've understood me to say. I want to be sure we don't miscommunicate and misunderstand each other again!

i understood everything, maybe i ve said it in a bad way... lets put it this way, if i was filthy rich, i am 100% sure any woman(well any woman i find attractive) can make me buy her everything she wants through sex :/