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  • Guest

    flirty teacher hits on bf. what to do?

    I have written here before about my bf's flirty music teacher. Since then I have stopped taking classes with him to take myself away from that situation. However, it seems that I can't get her out of my mind. I have dreams about him leaving me for her. I know he won't leave me for her.. but the dreams have felt soo real I can't seem to get away from it.

    My problem is .. Now, what do I do. I have separated myself from the issue and it keeps coming up in my mind subconsiously. I must add that she flirted with him INFRONT of me. Maybe that is why this is bothering me. Is because she has no respect for me, or the fact that he has a gf. This specific issue has been the cause of our fights. And I'm getting tired of it. I want him to further himself and learn music but I just have a bad feeling about her.



    I don't know... what does anyone think?
  • the wench
    Veteran Member
    • Dec 2009
    • 239

    can you not find a new music teacher that you both feel comfortable with? if you havent already i would discuss your fears with your bf and try reach a compromise 2 make both happy...and get rid of that teacher haha.
    if its a school/college teacher then she needs reported!

    Comment

    • Guest

      She's not a college or school teacher. It's a privately owned music studio that mainly teaches kids. What I don't like is that she has no respect for me when she did that. This has been an on-going issue. I personally think he's not really learning much from her. We have talked about it over and over. Sometimes I think that it's just my insecurities... and I try to not to make a big deal out of it. He thinks that it's ANY girl music teacher that I'll be insecure with. I don't think so. I think it's the fact that she flaunts herself at him is the key factor. I don't know what to do anymore.

      Sometimes I think that he's not compromising.. I know I always need to trust my instincts. And my instincts tell me she's not to be trusted.

      Comment

      • Mes T
        Veteran Member
        • Oct 2009
        • 2678

        For crying out loud, the woman is being paid to teach MUSIC not flirt with her students, WOW. I bet you can still report her, because this situation is not okay, no matter the age of the students.

        If I were you, I wouldn't stand for this any longer. Talk to the teacher, talk to her boss, and talk to your boyfriend. If your boyfriend doesn't take your concerns seriously, then I'd consider showing him the door rather than living like this.

        Comment

        • Guest

          I was seriously thinking about writing a letter to her boss. I talked to a friend of mine and told him that my bf doesn't even know how to read music, and first thing he said was to get a new teacher. HOW can you take music classes and NOT learn the fundamentals of reading music? He asked me a question the other day, and I learned what he's BARELY learning now, when I FIRST started.

          I want to take a music class and prove to him that he's wasting his money there. Because I can probably learn what he knows in half the time it's taking him.

          Comment

          • sourpuss
            Veteran Member
            • Dec 2006
            • 3581

            Well, before you do that, consider that he just may not be musically inclined. It could be that she's a bad teacher, or it could be that he just doesn't have the aptitude for music.
            I think you should talk to your boyfriend one more time and tell him that it makes you uncomfortable and that you think it's inappropriate. Also tell him that you're thinking about talking to her yourself because it's really bothering you. See what he does and if he blows it off then you can decide to confront her, show him the door, or just let it go.

            Comment

            • Guest

              He's a dj and had his own radio show in college. But I will sit on it and plan out what I'm going to say.


              Thanks for all the advice.

              Comment

              • x.st.angel.x
                Veteran Member
                • Apr 2009
                • 1479

                Im a music teacher for a private company and usually private companies have more than one teacher in the school, you could talk to him and tell him that the situation makes you uncomfortable and explain to him to maybe request another teacher??

                I still think it should be reported though, its very inprofessional.

                Comment

                • Guest

                  How exactly did she "flirt" with your guy?

                  What did she do?

                  Do you trust your guy? If so, this shouldn't be an issue.

                  I'd think twice about telling her boss. When it comes down to it, it really isn't your place to do so. He's the customer, not you.

                  Simple things like that can lead to someone needlessly losing their job...and I don't think you'd want that on your conscience.

                  Comment

                  • Guest

                    Originally posted by yellowpiXi3
                    Sometimes I think that it's just my insecurities... and I try to not to make a big deal out of it.
                    This speaks volumes.

                    You need to ask yourself why you are being insecure. Is it something your boyfriend has done....or is it you?

                    Comment

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