[rcoreyus]

FWIW, I do not like the idea of expensive engagement rings or expensive weddings. I got my wife a very inexpensive ring as a "token" when we were engaged, and we were married in a very inexpensive ceremony with just a few friends in a park - had just take-out food. Marriage has lasted >25 years, so I guess that works.

I am aware though that in some cultures a valuable ring / gift of some sort is expected .

[Stillness]

I guess I am asking am I wrong for feeling this way, am I wrong for leaving

Not only do I think you're not wrong, but I think that leaving would be the rightest thing you've done. He's made you a proposal to propose at some unspecified time in the future. Is that even a real thing? I don't understand. It sounds like he's just trying to shut you up. Like Corey, you saying he doesn't have the money to propose is the only thing that gives me pause. What money would he need? I'm thinking that if you were in the type of culture where a gift had to be given then you wouldn't be shacking up.

To cosign with some of the other comments, I was very unromantic and gave my girlfriend a ring to hold I had since I was 12 that meant a lot to me. I didn't plan on proposing, but at the moment I knew I wanted her for life. We did the necessary legal stuff and my uncle married us in his basement. $0 dollars besides the license. Her father had a reception/picnic in his backyard. Another $0. I got her a ring after we were married. 13 years for us next month and going stronger than ever.

I would suggest doing some research into the effects of cohabitation on relationships and marriage also. You may be shooting yourself in the foot by doing that if marriage is important to you.

[megan102]

I am 23 and he is 29, about to turn 30. I have told him I do not ask for an extravagant ring by any means I know what his budget is and will work around that..we are not super well off so I don't expect a $5000 ring, hell I dont even expect a $2000 ring. I am not asking for a big wedding, I would prefer myself to have atleast a year of engagement before the wedding. I know everyone has their opinions on weddings and marriage and some people are perfectly fine with never being married and just staying in a long comitted relationship. I am not one of those people just personal preference I want a marriage. I feel I am a pretty laid back person and this is the one thing I have pressed on. But as some of you feel I also feel he is just making excuses and I am starting to see maybe we do not want the same future. Unfortunately this sucks as it's taken 5 years to realize but I guess 5 is better than 10 or 15 etc. However Stillness, maybe cohabitation will shoot me in the foot but I personally would not want to commit myself to another person for the rest of my life without living with them first. Again, just personal preference.

[Stillness]

At least you're still young.

[rcoreyus]

I don't know your or his financial situation but $2000 can be a LOT for some people. I know that in college my sometimes girlfriend came from a fairly wealthy family, but didn't realize it, thought they were just average. She never really had the experience of not being able to afford simple things. She felt somewhat put out for not getting flowers, or being taken to dinner - not understanding that I didn't have the money.

I do not know what is going on in your situation, it may be completely different. Just be aware that there are many people who simply do not have $1000 to spend.

Please understand that I can be completely totally off base here.

[BabyGirl]

I would prefer myself to have at least a year of engagement before the wedding.

It has been 5 Plus ?

If Marriage in any " Legal " sense is Important to you.
Ask him to Marry You.
Our States and Constitution, here in USA, are still discussing the " Partnership "
Like Common Law and Multiple and Same Sex .

Spending 5 years with someone that will not " Commit " Legally ( or by Law of Recognition ) is a decision that you both must make Together.

You can Beat your head against the wall until you wonder why you have the headache . Eventually , it will hit your Brain . This hurts, how do I stop it ?

[Pollon]

At your age, I wouldn't advise getting married. The highest rates of divorce are among couples where the bride is under 25 at the wedding.

You haven't really offered your boyfriend's reasons for delay. Finance is a reasonable one. Your age is a reasonable one.

Living together isn't really helping him commit either. He is getting all the benefits of being married without the commitment. So what is the upside for him?

My suggestion is to move out and pursue your dreams and goals. If he wants to join you on that journey, he will get his act together and propose. If he doesn't, you know he's not serious about you.