[Darkrose]

I am not really sure what to call this but it involves making pictures of naked women..(CGI so they are not real) being humiliated by getting their clothes off tortured and mostly hung..There are other ways like burning at the stake, and drowning...

I found this out just last year that he has had these feelings since he was about six. We are both going to a psychologist and sometimes it helps and sometimes it doesn't. Has anyone here experienced this at all?

[Darkrose]

I would also like to add..my kid came in the room so I had to stop my first post, that I had no clue for 4 and a half years. He is a very kind, and gentle person, so this does not make sense to me.. the psych said it is a fantasy world and has nothing to do with his feelings for me and that he can easily compartmentalize it so it does not effect his daily activities..

[sourpuss]

Yikes. I have no idea what to say, other than I'm sorry, that sounds pretty stressful. How does he feel about it?

[CHANDLERS WISH]

the psych said it is a fantasy world and has nothing to do with his feelings for me and that he can easily compartmentalize it so it does not effect his daily activities..

Well, I guess that is the conclusion based on assessment which often is based on what someone tells you.

From 6 years of age? I have read often, of children drawing these sorts of things and almost always, it was based on abuse of an Adult that they are angry at inside, and so draw killing them.

You say that the phsyc says that it's "fantasy" but at 6 years of age? I understand an Adult to a degree...

She doesn't say he has a "split personality?"...

As Sourpuss stated, how does he feel about it, has he told you personally why he likes to do this and why he wanted to as a young child?

CW

[sourpuss]

Also, is it something that he thinks is ok and normal? Or is he seeing the therapist so he can stop the behavior?

[Darkrose]

He is going to find out why he is like this...is it inherent or did something happen to him when he was that young..he has a brother who is 8 years older who maybe thinks he did it by showing him horror magazines. His first recollection was of a person in an Iron Maiden.. the website he goes to has 10,000 members. I am there too because I have never heard of any other this before, sure I knew of bondage, but his kink is what I call cartoon character women, I can only explain it like that..it's been stressfull to say the least but I love the SOB so I am hanging in there til I can figure all this out too...I want to talk to someone who has a man like this as well, but so far I have not found any kind of support groups with this specific thing..I wish Doctor Phil would do a segment on this!

[Darkrose]

I personally think something had to of happened to him and he is blocking it out..

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Why not try hypnotherapy?

See if they can take him back to a young age.

I doubt looking at magazines that he brother showed him when he was young, even if the brother being a typical older kid, showed stuff to scare him as a joke...

I am not getting past the murder of women, via drowning, hung, or burnt and all being naked .

You say he's not aggressive but of a soft nature.

If it was fantasy there would have to surely be an aggressive sexual side as well to him.

I don't even remember being 6, so if something happened back then, he may not recall and hypnotherapy would be my bet to bring it to the surface.

But, he has to understand or acknowledge, seeing as he also "want's" to know, that there could be a bad memory hidden back there.

Good for you for wanting to know and help...

CW

[anonymouswhitefemale]

The control/domination/torture thing isn't exactly new territory, and if it was limited to just that I really wouldn't say that there is a problem. I see myself as pretty normal, but I still think about capturing, torturing and raping a woman - in a fantasy environment, and as others have said it's just fantasy and doesn't exactly effect real life. Despite my fantasies, I have never found the actual death of that person an arousing thing.... Which I guess does take it to another level.

But it's certainly true that one can be totally 'sick' in your fantasy life and still be a good moral person.

[rcoreyus]

There are a lot of people with violent sexual fantasies. For many this is only a fantasy and has nothing to do with reality. Some people act out these fantasies in a controlled way in BDSM - a perfectly reasonably thing if both partners are interested. Some work them out by making drawings or writing stories. It there is no reason to think he has acted on these fantasies, I would not worry at all.

Fantasies are very common - and I think in themselves harmless. (and yes, I also have rather nasty fantasies, but would never do anything to a real person).

Now, if he has intentionally hurt people or animals, or there are other warning signs that is is more than fantasy, that is a completely different thing.