[Explorer44]

Agreed..if you two are going to find your way through this, you and he may need to eliminate all the extemporaneous communication from your family members. They will want to 'take sides', without all the evidence, and really, this is between you and your husband, ultimately. Try not to try your case in the court of your family, lol.
It sounds good that he is getting the Court Order. Very strange that she would continue to pursue this. Is she mentally stable? Could she become a stalker?

I think that you are a very strong person, and have been through a crushing experience. The fact that your recovery together is being hampered by the continued efforts of your cousin is reprehensible, and I'm sorry about that.

I'm reminded of the movie Fatal Attraction, where the mistress just will not let it go....

[AAA]

Wow, you ladies have a lot of perspective, and it does help me.

This is what is happening.
He got the court order against her, the same afternoon she emailed me, some of the sms'es that was sent between the two of them. Most of them saying nothing, just good night and stuff, there was one that she scratched out, but due to brilliant technology i could see most of it, it was him telling her it is over, why would she not want me to see it, other than still wanting me to chase him away.
We phoned the court, we have to go see them to go to court, i don't have the energy for that right now, so it is on ice.
On new years, a minute past midnight, her brother in law phoned my husband, I just know she was behind it, and it made me so misarable, so I ended up getting horribly drunk( was looking for an excuse anyway)
I've made an appointment for us with a therapist on the 14th of Jan, he is more than willing to go.
I can't get hold of the advocate, but as soon as I do, I am going to sue her, she will be paying for the counseling.
Also then when I get him to do a letter, stating if my husband ever cheats again he will walk out of the marriage with nothing, and he will lose free access to the kids, I told him and he said it is fine, but i don't think he thinks i will go through with it, if he refuses to sign the letter, then i know he doesn't mean it when he says he will be faithfull from now on forever, so then he can go.

Some day's I am fine, but other day's everything he says to me, I believe is lies, I get very irritated with him, and snap for no good reason. I am scaring myself, as I am finding myself looking for reasons to fight with me, and that is not who i usually am.

I just don't wanna feel like this anymore, I wanna be happy again, although I am not misarable all the time, the 15% of the time that I am, I am very misarable.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Wow.....

I think she is ultra jealous of you.. I think that she deleted that one, so you would leave him, assume that it's all him... But, it's backfired on her. And this is so called "family"?

What did her husband say to your husband at midnight, I mean if he just said Happy New Year, that's ok But, yeah, it was a new year and with all the turbulence, you had a right to get drunk

He signs it, then he signs it. I think that he thinks she's a nutter. But, the fact he did it to start with, was bad huh. If you truly think about it, but he's obviously trying.

People do deserve second chances ... It when they fail at that, that they are toast.

Pending on whether there is regret or not, and there is. But, I am hoping it's not because and only because she's a nutter.

People forgive but it's harder to forget, give it time.

Keep your head up, you've got a good one on your shoulder... Your strong.... See where the road takes you from here.

Maybe, you shouldn't sue her, it's family and it will cause a rift, maybe you should do the silent treatment and tell him that includes her husband and you both... That's the best revenge ever.

Walking past someone as if you don't see them, never returning any emails/calls, in fact not even reading them seeing them.. It eats at them something bad.

Be happy, it's 2010... Make it work for you.

CW

[blowfish]

hi triple A, i read your story .....what a nightmare!!!
just wanna say i dont belive your cousin, i think she's a very tricky person, just look she can make your grandma and others oppose you when she was the one who making an affair, and your husband, he still wrong no matter what but its not all his fault....

everything its already happen dont care whose fault, now its your decision will you forgive your husband or not?.....

if you forgive him stay away from your cousin and tell your husband next time its happen again you gonna leave him no matter what ( at least that is what i'm gonna say to my huband and slap my cousin right in the face lol......well that just me)

good luck AAA

sorry my post kind a late huh.....

anyway
you got "freak" cousin......did anyone in your family ever notice?