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  • rcoreyus
    Veteran Member
    • Sep 2007
    • 4369

    Unlike a lot of the others on this forum, if this was a one-time incident, I might say there was hope. Unfortunately this sounds like just another step in escalating violence, so I think you need to leave immediately. It is very unlikely to get better.

    Comment

    • Colorado
      Veteran Member
      • Nov 2010
      • 460

      Originally posted by Colorado
      You know Julia, this is one of the reasons I get so ed Ps'd off when I see these abuse things... When dirtbags like this do the garbage that they do, they inevitably place a nametag on ME; because there is never any shortage of people willing to generalize everone into one basket... Yea, that pss's me off something fierce. However, Reading this type of post infuriates me to no end - trust me I hate the gabrage that does this stuff more than you do; but please don't generalize - rate ME on what I do and not what others do. We are NOT all alike. I have never lifted a finger toward a woman and never would, nor do I even raise my voice at her... I see that this type of post does the same with you - understandably so.

      The biggest issue here however is not that it causes generalizations... its that these SOBs are out there, and they continue to do this while being unchalleged without being taken off the streets.
      God help any one of them if I were to ever get my hands on them - they are not MEN - they are cowards.
      Hey Julia, a friend just mentioned that I shouldn't be angry with you for saying what you said - I explained that I wasn't .
      Anyhow, I hope what I said wasnt taken that way, as that is not what I mean at all. Simply meant that - that is the reason why I hate that sort of thing (abusive men) so much - because folks do get bad raps because some others can't act like humans... Nothing personal against you at all.
      As I also mentioned - I think you just got worked up over the same stuff that I do and vented. I don't hold that against you, so I hope you don't take it that way ok? No offense intended.

      Comment

      • kristalyn_04
        Veteran Member
        • Oct 2009
        • 2164

        Everyone is absolutely right. Get out, now. This is escalating, and it won't stop. So many women in abusive situations are blinded by their love for their SO, and hope that it will get better, but it never does. NEVER.

        When I was little, my mother had this problem with getting into abusive relationships (because she had so many issues herself, including self-esteem). I watched this happen, horrific things, and I was scared out of my mind. When I got older, I took up karate. Now I'm a 3rd degree black belt... if a man ever tried to hurt me or someone I love, he would be on the ground begging for mercy before he had a chance to hit again.

        Once you're out of this situation and you're safe, it might not be a bad idea to take some self-defense classes. Not only does it prepare you, but it does wonders for the self esteem. Good luck, you will be in our thoughts. Please give us an update soon.

        Comment

        • JuliaBarill
          Member
          • Dec 2010
          • 34

          yeh and im sure your sweet as pie....but its in your nature...its in a mans nature to stare ....at (edit) while your signifigent other is next to you...its in your nature to fantasize about other woman...im not trying to here that your perfect...couse noone is were all human.....if its in your nature and im not giving you a label if anything im pulling facts. no matter which way you look at it. men will always have a dirty mind.....
          Last edited by CHANDLERS WISH; 12-15-2010, 01:22 AM. Reason: don't go behind the profanity filter

          Comment

          • Guest

            Originally posted by JuliaBarill
            yeh and im sure your sweet as pie....but its in your nature...its in a mans nature to stare ....at (edit) while your signifigent other is next to you...its in your nature to fantasize about other woman...im not trying to here that your perfect...couse noone is were all human.....if its in your nature and im not giving you a label if anything im pulling facts. no matter which way you look at it. men will always have a dirty mind.....
            Julia, i used to think the same way, the only thing men cared about was what under my skirt, i've since learned not all men are like that, the vast majority of the men on this site understand and sympathize with us when we have problems like this young lady that is posting now..

            Whats important now, is that the women and "men" of this forum give her our support..
            Last edited by CHANDLERS WISH; 12-15-2010, 01:27 AM. Reason: EDITED Julia's quotation

            Comment

            • JuliaBarill
              Member
              • Dec 2010
              • 34

              rubbish all men think the same deep down! lol but i like u sidney ur cool <3

              Comment

              • SaharaJim
                Veteran Member
                • Jun 2010
                • 426

                Missy2010; I think you got some very good advice here. The level of violence is escalating from what you said in your original post. Get out and get some place "safe" as quickly as possible. As I have said before i agree absolutely with Colorado's views on this. Your boyfriend is not "acting like a man". A man does not hurt and hit those who are physically incapable of fighting back. His are the actions of a controlling coward. And he quite obviously means to "control" you through physical force and intimidation. And contrary to what some people may post. Not ALL MEN; or even most men, are like this. But for your own sanity and safety...get out now and don't be tricked or sweet talked into going back.

                Comment

                • missy2010
                  Junior Member
                  • Dec 2010
                  • 3

                  First of all thank u all for ur advices.. n yes im new to this site.. i was desperate for help... well yesterday i pack some of my things n im stayin at my parents house... when my husband saw me packin he laugh n said i wouldnt leave since i always try to leave n stay.. but no this time he was wrong n when he saw me walkin out that door he started crying like a baby! n apologizing for evrything tellin me he was gonna look for professional help... i was tryin to be the strongest possible n yes i left... he has callin me so manny times n text me every minute... i dont wanna talk to him n dont wanna see him!! he send me a text sayin that he went to church n that he talk to a preist askin him for help to save our marriage... dont know what to believe... but if hes tryin to get me back its not gonna be that easy... n my family hates him now! so hes gonna have to talk to a lot of people not just me... but for now im staying at my parents house n not goin back...
                  Last edited by missy2010; 12-14-2010, 12:40 PM.

                  Comment

                  • JustHormonious
                    Veteran Member
                    • Oct 2010
                    • 322

                    Good for you, now stay strong and stay put with your family. Take the time to address your marital issues one at a time. This is about much more than him hitting you.
                    Before you talk about what you want ~ Be happy with what you have

                    Comment

                    • Ashlee T.
                      Veteran Member
                      • Dec 2008
                      • 6412

                      Good job Missy. Stay tough. Don't go back. Glad to hear you're safe with your family and that you've been honest with them about what happened.
                      "Be what you're looking for."

                      Comment

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