[brunettebabe]

The girl has a boyfriend and two kids. He has called her, but only a few times. When we planned on going bowling it was going to be the three of us: hubby, me, and the girl. Hubby and I don't go out because we just don't. Our idea of fun is to go work out.

[Hopeless Dork]

Was her bf invited as well? Why target her as the friend and not the couple together? It just feels off to me. Not saying he wants her or anything of that nature, just saying if he wants to make friends for you or him or the both of you he is going about it very akwardly.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Now all of the sudden when this girl is in the picture he wants to go out, have fun, and drink.

Our idea of fun is to go work out.

I don't know of anyone who thinks working out is fun, rather an achievement a "feel good" feeling after the fact.

I wonder therefore, if it's more of a "habit" and something of a "must do" a need...Than fun for him anymore.

Perhaps he's really bored with same old same old lifestyle, maybe Tara he really does want to get out, do different things, play bowls, drink and laugh...

I also agree with others, why isn't it a couple's "date"...

[caterpillar79]

I agree to both posters - your hubby may be innocent but he is doing it in a way close to icky boundaries.

Maybe you need to provide us more details about your routine/ways as a couple. What else do you do together besides workout? Do you have other friends who are couples also and if you do, do you go out with them as a couple as well? Do you have individual friends of the same gender?

What are the things that concern you the most regarding this girl? Is it just the fact that your husband seems excited and wanting to go out with her around (or maybe I'm reading it wrong)? Are there other concerns in general regarding your husband, i.e. him not initiating anything for a date with you alone,etc...?

[brunettebabe]

hubbby doesn't really have any friends. he usually only talks to me and family. i have a few friends, ones i knew from high school, but i never hang out with them because they all live too far away. all hubby and i do is work out. i'm concerned about this girl because why tell me you don't want to talk to her, but then the next minute you're babbling away. He keeps on going back and forth about whether or not he should talk to her. Also why all of the sudden does he want to go out and drink with this girl when we never do. i wish hubby could spend a little more time with me. he eats with me at the dinner table for like five minutes when he wants to get up to leave to finish the rest of his meal in the basement. he likes to hang out in the basement a lot.

[Darling]

Why don't you suggest going to play pool or bowling have a few drinks together, sometimes things get old, go out do something different, listen to music and dance a little. Be flirty and show him you are more then willing to change things up.
I would take this "girl" as a sign. Maybe he is looking for a fun escape from normal, and there's no reason for you not to be that girl.

[caterpillar79]

How long have you been married? Seems like you are in a rut - not sure, but it looks to me like he is starting to get bored?

I am not the kind of person who initiates fun things to do as well (between my hubby and I). What I tend to do it I would do fun stuff on my own and let him figure it out and then eventually, he'd feel envious or curious enough to join me in whatever fun thing I am doing. Next thing I know, he's the one planning fun things to do together.

What have you been doing on your end that you enjoy doing alone?

[brunettebabe]

we have been married for seven years. when i am not busy running errands or working i like to relax at home. i am a home body. like to watch tv, talk on the phone, play with the computer, work on cleaning the house, etc.

[caterpillar79]

we have been married for seven years. when i am not busy running errands or working i like to relax at home. i am a home body. like to watch tv, talk on the phone, play with the computer, work on cleaning the house, etc.

And what does he do while you're doing your chores basically? Can't you reprogram yourself such that you can have the time to go out and have a good time aside from working out together?

When, in your lifetime as a married couple has he ever initiated for a date with you alone or just a time out to drink and enjoy the evening (dinner, walk in the park, etc...) ?

[brunettebabe]

caterpillar, can we talk personally? email back and forth or send private messages on here or something?