[Motorguy]

Hubby already has imaged what his life would be without me. We had to get life insurance and contemplate filing that void. He admits that he would be at a greater loss if I was out of the picture compared to if he was out of the picture for me.

And the thing about shock value, doesn't work. A few years ago on my birthday, he promised dinner and a movie. Of course, he hadn't planned anything. I had to look up the movie schedule, pick a restaurant, call his sister to arrange child care, etc. He couldn't even get ready on time. And I mean he was 2 hours later than the agreed upon time. I was so upset that I was literary curled up in a ball on the floor crying. I told him I didn't want to go. It wasn't just another argument. It was clear I was VERY unset. We finally ended up going. I can't remember the exact conversation, but I think the kids may have been involved in getting me off the floor and into the car. Did the year after that change? No. Same thing again. I just lower my standards and not expect anything.

Hey SP I feel for you many men are completely brain dead in this department on wife's birthdays and anniversary. I never done this to my wife ever because if i did just say i would be missing a very important of my body that I cherish whole heartily the family jewels and she is serous. I always have the dinner plains along with other ideas that i will spring on her for her birthday talk with her girl friend. We had a big blow out for her 50th birthday party that she was so surprise she was crying she was so happy. Let's just say she show her thanks between the sheets that night.

[Claret]

My ex wasn't a great husband, father or anything. He never bought a birthday card for me or the kids, never brought home flowers or even a take-out meal- mainly because he was too busy sitting at the bar. Anyway...what I learned to do, when the kids were small, I'd give them a couple of bucks, take them to the store and they'd be able to buy me a gift. THEN, I'd take myself to a store and buy myself something I wanted and tell my ex it was his gift to me.

Need I say, at that point, I had very expensive tastes - but I got what I wanted.

[Trixareforkids]

My ex wasn't a great husband, father or anything. He never bought a birthday card for me or the kids, never brought home flowers or even a take-out meal- mainly because he was too busy sitting at the bar. Anyway...what I learned to do, when the kids were small, I'd give them a couple of bucks, take them to the store and they'd be able to buy me a gift. THEN, I'd take myself to a store and buy myself something I wanted and tell my ex it was his gift to me.

Need I say, at that point, I had very expensive tastes - but I got what I wanted.

I feel I should point out that he's now your EX, so obviously you didn't get what you wanted...