[CHANDLERS WISH]

I think we have to love ourselves and take things with a grain of salt.

Yesterday we were having a "date" lunch at a hotel overlooking the sea. A woman walked past with "nice" boobs and she coupled it with a very short skirt... I looked. CD looked, and I smiled and I said, and then there's but she's got a great body. He said " I'll wait for her to come back"... Later in the day he mentioned "oh I forgot to look when she came back" and I saw her, and pointed her out.. We had a chat about how his ex-wife would have related. And, how we can talk about anything, as "mates".. He said that she would have stared at him in anger and gotten jealous.. He never would have been able to speak like that. How great it is to be free? To be able to be yourself. To know that the person you are with loves you and you don't ever have to worry about it.

[jns]

Raina, I think BG has the best comments. What you did was basically wave a red flag at a bull in how you set up your comment. Bear had a way to counter your claim, so it came out. Guys are mostly very competitive and you got in a competition with him. In time, Bear should learn not to go there when baited in such a way. He will learn that women do this from time to time and it is best to find a way out that does not include stepping on a mine. I do not think it is really him putting his foot in his mouth, rather a competitive streak. It is a snake's nature to bite and if you get within striking distance and the snake bites you it is not because the snake is bad for doing what nature told it to do.

For the comments about penis size and breast size, I have never worried about my penis size and I'm not up to porn standards. There are plenty of guys that don't. There are plenty of women who don't worry about breast size, either. Most of them aren't found in the first world where advertising to women that you have to have large breasts to have a happy life is ubiquitous. I know because I have traveled and stayed in third world countries where it is not something to worry about and where many models have smaller breasts. I suppose that if there was a blanket of advertising to men that you needed nine inches to be a real man and had picture to go along with it (maybe oversized codpieces), guys everywhere that the advertising reached would feel inadequate.