[MusicalRose]

After two months, I think the surgery has been a success!!! After the stitches fell out, I was instructed to begin using Premarin again every night. Then, instead of going back to sex right away, I was instructed to use a set of graduated vaginal dilators to get my body used to penetration again.

BeautifulMess - find out where you can get a fissurectomy and try to get them to let you follow it up with Premarin cream. It worked for me. I am 21 and having the same problems. It also sounds like you might have trouble with primary vaginismus. I would suggest visiting Vaginismus.com for more information about dilators and teaching your body that sex doesn't have to hurt. There is a forum full of supportive women that are very helpful in getting each other through this tough time.

Edit: BeautifulMess your story also sounds so much like mine with a big scary extra hold down there. Don't give up hope. You can find a solution.

[ldavis]

Hi I am just wondering if you knew the disadvantages of premarin....this drug is from pregnant horses' urine. These farmers keep the mares in a 5X3 stalls for six months of their pregnancy; and in order to keep their urine more concentrated they dehydrate them and only allow them to drink every three days. There are many other alternatives to this drug and these drugs are equally if not more effective than premarin. I wish there was a way to tell women about the affects of these drugs before they are prescribed. These horses live to be only 8 or 9 instead of the usual 20 and the surviving foals are sent to slaughter. PLEASE HELP STOP THIS!

[Northern lass]

I have been searching for a solution to painful sex for five years and after self examination we realised that I had a tear that reopened each time. This needed surgery to remove the damaged tissue. It will not heal alone once it becomes damaged and removal is the only option. It's a case of finding the right doctor as over the last year I even had a doctor tell me it is possible to imagine pain! Yes he was a man! I have three months to heal now but fingers crossed this will work! Please don't put up with pain during sex it is not normal.

I wish more than anything that it was that simple. When you have tears in that area adding any kind of lubricant burns like crazy. Even if the tear is not fresh it tares after insertion and then in lubricant still present causes it to burn making it even more painful. We've tried using straight water which sometimes help because it doesn't burn like KY but then when it tears again during intercourse its still painful but sometimes I can keep going, sometimes I cant.

Read the article if you have this problem too....scroll down to the bottom when it talks about secondary causes.

[shortone1988]

Hi
From reading all your posts it’s relieving to see I’m not alone with these struggles. Just a shame we have to suffer in the first place right?

I’m 30 and I’ve been getting tears for a few years now. Prior to this I have been very sexually active since 21 and never had any issues. It began with my ex who is a tall stocky chap. 6ft6 and broad while I’m 5ft2. We tried everything to overcome it. Different positions, extra lube. Once he was inside the sex was completely fine as I relaxed and the area slightly numbed to the sensation, but it was the initial “here it comes” entry that was difficult. Sometimes him even just touching the entrance to my vagina was a huge “OW!!! No no no!!” I always tensed up with anxiety when the time came around which didn’t help the matter. It’s very hard to relax when you know you’re going to get a stinging sensation. Reverse cowgirl and some other positions too really helped but it started taking its toll on me that I couldn’t switch off to it and just jump straight into it. Certainly multiple sessions became a NO NO. Each time we had to prep for it and do a “brace yourself” sort of notion. Going to the toilet a few times after sex became painful too with stinging and bleeding. It took its toll on our relationship and we separated two years in. I started to associate sex with him as painful and it put me off.

I visited a gyno and was advised to massage vaginal cream into the wound to keep it open, sort of stretch it out. It kept sealing up and then tearing again over and over. I tried that for a few months and no joy. If anything the repeat massaging caused it to continuously bleed and be irritated, as well as be in constant discomfort. Given that area, the wound is never dry enough to scab over and resealed due to legs always being close together. I’ve been tested for STI’s, changed diet, trialed coming off the pill to see if it helped my libido. TRIED EVERYTHING! No luck. It got to the point the area repeatedly teared while washing, sleeping in certain positions and stuff.

I’ve recently had another gyno appointment and was suggested that I try a dilator for the next 5 weeks gradually each week going up a size in dilator to loosen me and get me more comfortable with average penis size entering. Sort of like ear stretching. I’ve started doing that and also looked into pelvic floor exercises to weaken the muscles. Over time I’ve tensed up with the anxiety of each sex session so often that I’ve tightened my pelvic floor muscles a huge amount which doesn’t help the situation. I believe weakening my pelvic floor will help me but that will take time.
I’ve also looked into perineum massages that are recommended for pregnant women to prevent tears during labour. Again, early stages but I feel it could be beneficial long term. Am I doing the right thing??
I’m single and not looking to sleep with anyone for a while so thankfully it allows me a long time to train my body. At the end of the day I fear the tear will continue to seal and reopen regardless of how many stretches and pelvic floor work I do, which frustrates me – as I’m sure it would all of you. What I would like to know though is if there is any way of putting a form of sealant on the wound while it’s open to prevent it from constantly healing and reopening. Any ideas? Appreciate responses from anyone.

[atskitty2]

Are they saying that you have a smaller than typical vaginal canal? Is that why they're recommending these stretching techniques?

[jns]

Wounds and tears should heal over time unless there is something else biologically wrong even in an area that is always moist.

[shortone1988]

Response to atskitty2: I'm not sure to be honest. I was examined but the gyno who did the checks only really felt my perineum and not any internal examination. I've been very sexually active since 21. Never had any issues before. Never struggled with girth being painful, certainly not with entry. I think they are recommended the dilator as a way of stopping me from tensing up on preparation for entry. I think if i can learn to switch off from the "here it comes, brace yourself" mind set when entered then my pelvic floor will naturally relax and reduce the chances of it happening repetitively. Here's hoping anyway. I've been using it for a week now and it certainly has helped a little already.