[SorridLives]

Ne ne ne necro necro....

Come on, just make a new post, don't dig up one that old...


As for bisexuality, personally I think that everyone is bisexual to a degree, it's just how well dogma, social prejudice and religion have beaten in out of people. I'm also a bit suprised about how facist many women here at the idea of their man wanting to experiment a bit - as many women here claim they'd like to sleep with a woman, but the other side of the coin is somehow different?

It's no coincidence that the more accepted homo/bisexuality is becoming, the more people experiment a bit, most people have that interest buried in them somewhere.

In all fairness, Anon-

I didn't see many criticisms of it....just telling the original poster she had to make a decision or helping her try to figure it out. A woman has a right to know is her lover is bisexual or not, don't you think??

[SorridLives]

I guess I should have looked at the date though....this is old and the OP probably isn't here anymore! argh

[anonymouswhitefemale]

In all fairness, Anon-

I didn't see many criticisms of it....

I was referring to the general feeling I've got from reading many different threads on the subject here... The apparently overiding feeling being "dump him immediately, he's going to come home, give you AIDS, and probably rape your children".


I think in theory one partner has a right to know if the other is bisexual, but I think for full truth to be shared one has to respect that the other person isn't narrow minded and prejudiced, as many discussing this topic have been, making me think that lots of women embrace their own potential bisexuality and vomit at the thought of their partners'.

[SorridLives]

I was referring to the general feeling I've got from reading many different threads on the subject here... The apparently overiding feeling being "dump him immediately, he's going to come home, give you AIDS, and probably rape your children".


I think in theory one partner has a right to know if the other is bisexual, but I think for full truth to be shared one has to respect that the other person isn't narrow minded and prejudiced, as many discussing this topic have been, making me think that lots of women embrace their own potential bisexuality and vomit at the thought of their partners'.

I don't vomit at the thought, but I think it might very well be a more difficult and complicated relationship with a truly bisexual man. I think it is sexy in a way, but not if I thought he need it and there would be yet another temptation for him. After all, I can't be a man....no how, no way.
I wouldn't be comfortable (in the long run), and wouldn't have a serious relationship with someone who was bisexual. Maybe a fling/affair, if I was single. Just my choice.

[anonymouswhitefemale]

Yeah, it's your choice.

But you can see why a semi-bisexual man who loved you, and who knew you'd think like that, who was self assured that he wasn't going to be cheating on you, might decide that you didn't need to know that fact about him....

I mean, are all bisexuals to be relegated, because somehow the fact that you might fancy men as well as women makes it a certainty that you'll cheat, rather than the same liklihood? I think it's a difficult area, and one that people need to think about, but I think because someone is open to both genders doesn't imply that they need both genders, I think that loving someone is loving someone....

[SorridLives]

Yeah, it's your choice.

But you can see why a semi-bisexual man who loved you, and who knew you'd think like that, who was self assured that he wasn't going to be cheating on you, might decide that you didn't need to know that fact about him....

I mean, are all bisexuals to be relegated, because somehow the fact that you might fancy men as well as women makes it a certainty that you'll cheat, rather than the same liklihood? I think it's a difficult area, and one that people need to think about, but I think because someone is open to both genders doesn't imply that they need both genders, I think that loving someone is loving someone....

Yeah, I can see how a bisexual guy would want to lie about it to a straight woman whom he loved. It just isn't right or fair, IMO. Relationships should be based in the truth.
Yes, a bisexual might be able to be faithful....but I just happen to lean to thinking it may be harder to be faithful. (Wrong or right.) That would scare me.

[Uneeklyme]

Even tho the OP probably isnt here anymore, there is a point in her post that is overlooked. She says they talk of her being with another man or even a woman. Its part of their "dirty" talk. Its fantasies they play out/talk about while having sex. Now I get that she "plays" along with the fantasy not really wanting to be with someone else, man or woman BUT... How is it that he is automatically Bi because he turns it around to him being with a guy? WTF is the difference? Is she possibly bi because she tells him she wants to have sex with a woman during their play? How would it be if he was repulsed by that thought and tells her in no certian terms they will not live like that so if she is interested or has an inkling that she might like to be with another woman... you know I love you but we need to go our separate ways....

Someone pointed out the what makes you think you can be everything to a straight person based on the basically I dont want him to be bi cuz then I wont be able to give him what he wants whine. Its a fact that no one person can be everything for someone.

IMO if you might not like what your hearing, dont freakin ask or get into the situation where it may come up. Maybe he really does feel bi but he is not acting on those feelings. He has made the choice to be with her and supress who/what he really is for the sake of her happiness and security. I bet it took him years... yep, looks to be about 6 or so... to even mention this to her for fear of rejection and not being accepted. She did exactly what he feared she would. Im thinking he probably feels threatened and insecure and confused and hurt. If I were in his position I would be inclined to lie, smooth it over and always guard what I am thinking and feeling if I got a reaction like the one she gave him.

I agree that if a person is bi, six years into a relationship is probably not a good time for it to come out. Hiding it takes some choices away from your partner. I find that alot of men ponder sex with another man but thats all it is... a fleeting thought...Just because we think about something doesnt mean its the way it is. If our thoughts meant fact, well, anyone that has thoughts can imagine the havoc that could create.

Harder for a bisexual man to be faithful? Seriously? Why? Is it because they have more choices in sex partners? Since they are non discriminate about equipment they automatically turn into lecherous s?

[anonymouswhitefemale]

Here here.

Regarding bisexuality, it's a blurred line. I think probably enjoying the thought of something with a same sex partner is bisexual, the problem isn't with the definitions, it's with the stigma related to those definitions. As I stated earlier, I think everyone is a little bit bisexual, whether they allow themselves to admit it or not, it's simply human curiosity. However, judging by how the term "bisexual" is viewed by both men and women, people will shy away from it, regardless of the shreds of truth to it.

Also, is there really that much difference between fantasizing about it and doing it? Does ignoring an urge you feel make you straight, where is exploring it makes you gay/bisexual?

[SinisterUrge]

I wish I was bisexual. Then I could change my screen name to 'AnythingThatMoves'.

[Uneeklyme]

Here here.

Regarding bisexuality, it's a blurred line. I think probably enjoying the thought of something with a same sex partner is bisexual, the problem isn't with the definitions, it's with the stigma related to those definitions. As I stated earlier, I think everyone is a little bit bisexual, whether they allow themselves to admit it or not, it's simply human curiosity. However, judging by how the term "bisexual" is viewed by both men and women, people will shy away from it, regardless of the shreds of truth to it.

Also, is there really that much difference between fantasizing about it and doing it? Does ignoring an urge you feel make you straight, where is exploring it makes you gay/bisexual?

Eh... by true definition just an attraction makes a person bi. Haveing been in the world of gays and lesbians... they would say straight until youve actually batted for the other team. I personally feel that thinking about it is a tendency. The act itself is the defining moment. Symantics tho. I agree that everyone thinks about it a time or two and those who say they dont are lying.

Having said this... IMO there is a pretty big leap between thinking about it and actually doing it. Acting on bi thoughts really isn't as easy as some people would like us to think. First there is the mentle hurdle to get over. Once you put yourself out there, finding an acceptable partner of the same sex is just as hard if not harder than finding one of the opposite sex. Unless your buying it off the street or have few morals/values, finding a suitable partner of the same sex can be difficult. Its not like bisexuals send out homing beacons. At least in a straight relationship man/woman...do the math.

I find that for so many people the thought and feeling is so fleeting that its easily ignored. Put some effort into it and act on it and yep, your bi. Well, that is unless your straight up exclusive with the same sex then that just makes you gay/lesbian.

I wish I was bisexual. Then I could change my screen name to 'AnythingThatMoves'.

LMAO!