[arabellafigg]

Ok, i had a 6 year realationship with someone, this ended soon after i had our child, a year later i met someone else, we started seeing eachother 6 months ago but have only just started having a proper sexual relationship.

I know it's probably bad to compare men, but my ex used to come much more quickly. With M, it seemed to take a good 20-30 mins. He wasen't complaning, but i was pretty much dead on my feet! And when it did happen, it didn't seem very intense.

Any ideas on how i can make him have a much faster, deeper orgasm?

[newhere808]

When you say that his orgasm wasn't very intense, how do you mean? Is it that he doesn't physically react, he just cums? Like women, all men do not react the same sexually, but if his orgasm is "weak" it could be a prostate issue, or it could simply be an anxiety thing.

[arabellafigg]

A few shudders, and that was it. If you wern't looking out for it, it could have easily passed by without noticing. We have been friends since we were in high school, so i dont think it can be an anxiety thing? Who knows. We have spoken about it, and he seems completely satisfied, nothing is wrong, etc. I guess i wanted it to be more intense, perhaps all men are different

[newhere808]

A few shudders, and that was it. If you wern't looking out for it, it could have easily passed by without noticing. We have been friends since we were in high school, so i dont think it can be an anxiety thing? Who knows. We have spoken about it, and he seems completely satisfied, nothing is wrong, etc. I guess i wanted it to be more intense, perhaps all men are different

Hmmm, well depending on how old he is there's no reason to assume there is something medically wrong, given your description. The fact that you guys were friends for awhile could actually be a big source of anxiety, but if he seems otherwise satisfied then there may be no issue.

All men certainly are different in their reactions, some orgasm very quickly and are so sensitive they are useless afterwords. The only time i've ever gone as long as your talking about is "round2/3" after a previous orgasm.

[arabellafigg]

I guess i'm not really complaining, i just find it unusual to take so long, and the outcome wasn't what i expected. He is 27, no medical problems, doesnt smoke, doesnt drink a lot. And when i say 20-30 mins, i mean of actual penetration. There was about 15 mins before this...

[Hopeless Dork]

Its possible he is TRYING to last that long thinking its what you want of him... do you know for certain he is actually trying to orgasm and its just taking that long? Or could it be that he CAN come quicker but is holding out because he thinks you want him to?

Do you orgasm when you have sex with him and if so do you make him aware its happened? Perhaps he is waiting on you or something?

[arabellafigg]

I dont think that he was trying to make it 'last longer',it just happened to take such a long time. I normally tell him if i am going to orgasm, and yes i do orgasm with him during sex so i dont think he was waiting for me either.

[WildChild]

Try some pressure on his taint. That may move him along.

[Texasred]

Try some pressure on his taint. That may move him along.

It might at that, especially if the pressure is rhythmic.

[LilahX]

I'm not sure what you mean by 'dead on my feet'. Are you just wanting him to come faster because you're bored/tired yourself?

The process (for both of you) should be just as enjoyable as the end result. I don't really understand why you want to hurry this when it feels so good for him. Personally there's nothing I like more than spending a very long time teasing my man and making him feel good, bringing him to the brink then easing off till he's fit to explode. Great sex is about the journey as much as the destination. Actually I think it's more about the journey.

There is so much you can do so that you both are having pleasure the whole time, not fell like you're just working hard waiting for the big 'O'.

As for his unintense orgasm, that's not unusual for guys. I don't know if their orgasms are less intense physically than females (wouldn't it be great to feel one so we know?), but men tend to be quite 'introvert' about their orgasms. I'm pretty sure even tho they might look or sound like the top of their head is blowing off I reckon they feel it anyway. I wouldn't judge his pleasure by his reaction.

I wouldn't see him taking a long time as a burden, I'd see it as an opportunity to show him how much you love making him feel good.