[Texasred]

thanks for the help, guys. it's incredibly comforting just to know that other women are going through this with their men, and that I'm not the only one internalizing it (even when I shouldn't). Taking all the advice to heart, for sure. Also find it funny that everyone assumes he's married... we have many reasons for not going public with the relationship. But I certainly think the clandestine nature of our relationship, be it exciting one moment and stressful the next, is certainly putting pressure on him and his "mini-me". Basically, the guy's got all sorts of stress AND a hormonal issue. double whammy! I'll definitely keep everyone posted on how things go this weekend. Thanks !!

Best of luck!

[Hoochie Coochie Man]

My husband is 12 years older than me and started having the same problem. At first I thought is was just because he was under a lot of pressure do to losing job. It went on for several weeks. I did try oral sex ...very slowly and gently and he did have erection and orgasm..but that worked only once.. but still could not keep erection inside me...Finally he went to doctor and discovered he had high blood pressure and type 2 diabetes....Still has problem but I hope new treatment will help. I know this has been difficult emotionally for me and has caused me to doubt myself, but knowing a medical problem could be the real cause has given me some hope for the time being.

ED is an issue at every age, regularly as young as 19. The three PDE 5 inhibitors currently on the market only treat vascular issues and only one small aspect of it. There are drugs in development to treat the other two causes, so soon the “it’s all in your head” nonsense you so often hear will be just that; nonsense. In every case it is and always has been a medical issue. Lisa 35, I can’t imagine the emotional toll this must be taking you. But try to remember, if he were suffering from the tremors of Parkinson’s disease, would you feel less of a women because you could find no physical or emotional support that could lessen those tremors?

PrincessAnne: May I ask you a question? If these erection difficulties persist will it eventually become a deal breaker or are there other aspects of your sexual relationship that provides you pleasure and fulfillment?

Hopeless Dork: Some shock or surprise can flip the switch on arousal causing the quick loss of an erection. But as men move into there late twenties and beyond, touch and physical sensation become important in gaining and maintaining an erection. If a man were engaged in giving oral sex, he might be highly aroused, but not have an erection because of the lack of direct physical stimulation