[shweedart]

I can't just up and leave him because he's selfish in bed, we're fantastic in every other aspect of our relationship. Yes it upsets me but I can't give up on 3 years until I've tried everything.

I didnt talk to him about it, he's just gone to sleep. Probably because I havn't shown him any interest sexually today, see how he likes it...seems pretty unphased though. I don't think he'd care for very long if we stopped altogether, once he realises he can wank to his hearts content!

You cant have a low sex drive if you can wank everyday so that clears that up.

[WildChild]

Yep. Welcome to the world of dealing with emotionally disconnected men.

[shweedart]

What do we do? Do we punch them?

[WildChild]

Nah, that doesn't seem to help.

[shweedart]

I really am stumped! I don't wanna lose him or leave him, I'm head over heels in love...just the thought of leaving him makes me well up

I'm not one of those stupid, naive girls who allows her man to mis-treat her... It purely is just when it come to pleasing me.

What should I say?

[Texinator]

His sex drive's fine when it comes to blowjobs and getting straight to sex

So it's only when he's expected to do some work and put in an effort where he has problems...

It seems to be a common problem, however, and I wish I could give an answer, but I don't understand men that don't love to go down on a woman.

[kristalyn_04]

Bottom line, he's being selfish and lazy. He just wants to get off and be done with it. I was in a relationship like that several years ago, and after 2 years of putting up with that I started being very unhappy, frustrated, and feeling very used... so I got out of it.

If talking to him about it doesn't help, then I really don't know what else to say besides go to couple's counseling or something. Good luck, I really hope you find a solution to this.

[rcoreyus]

Sadly you need to decide. If other things make up for it, you may just need to live with someone who is a selfish lover. Don't bet on him changing because you will likely be disappointed.

[WildChild]

I really am stumped! I don't wanna lose him or leave him, I'm head over heels in love...just the thought of leaving him makes me well up

I'm not one of those stupid, naive girls who allows her man to mis-treat her... It purely is just when it come to pleasing me.

What should I say?

I was head over heels too. What I ended up saying, after a lot of talking, was, good bye.
At this point I can't say its made my life wonderful but at least I'm not locked into that situation anymore.

[shweedart]

I'm just gonna have to do my serious face! This morning he said 'What do I have to do to get a blowjob around here' jokingly, though there was meaning...I just looked at him and went 'hmm!'

ha! I think some tough love is in order...and after all that, if he doesn't change then I'll lay it out on the table for him that I wont put up with it forever!