[Meg :)]

Hi,
I don't really know where to start, the thing is I didn't know where else to go so I decided to come to any of you who are willing to ask for your help.

Right well I've been with my boyfriend for 14 months now but we've been best friends for 5years and I lost my virginity to him 3 months ago and my issue is that no matter how hard I try I just can't be 'sexy' in our relationship.
I wouldn't say it was to do with being uncomfortable around him or anything like that, it's just my personality, I'm a goofy person who does silly things.

But the thing is my self esteem is starting to take a major hit and I think it's about time I do something about it. So I decided to ask my boyfriend what I could do to be more attractive to him and what he would find sexy and all it ended up doing was making him worried about me feeling bad aboutt myself and he said the only reason I don't act sexy is because I don't try..which I can assure you is not the case as I've tried really hard but the fact it's gone unnoticed proves how bad I am.

So this is where you come in.....On Tuesday we'll have his place to ourselves and I really really want to do something so un-me and surprise him, I just want to make it really amazing for him and to actually be sexy for once and any ideas or tips on how I can be sexy would be so utterly appreciated....especially seeings as you've had to put up with my endless babble
and to anyone who helps, thank you so so much, it really does mean a lot x

[jns]

Do you wear high heels? High heels, especially the high ones, force a woman's hips forward to maintain balance and can make almost any woman look sexy. You have to wear them a number of times to look graceful.

Have you tried sexy underwear and things like corsets?

[Texasred]

The nice thing about high heels, I think, is that even a woman who is a novice at wearing them looks good; it's the thought that counts! And concentrating on not falling off will take your mind off the mundane things, like "Do I look sexy?" so *I* think they can make you less self-conscious rather than more so.
But if you've been with this guy for 5 years, there must be something about you he really likes!
Why don't you ask HIM what HE thinks would be sexy?
The answer might surprise you.
It might be as simple as seeing you walking around his place naked...

[Alexandra]

Men are very visual creatures. High heels are a great suggestion to start with. Why don't you go buy some sexy lingerie? Heels, stockings, cute lacy underwear and bra? You can put it on under your clothes and even do a little strip tease for him, if he's into that. Most guys just find confidence sexy, so even if something goes wrong (Fate forbid you tear something or trip), just continue with a smoldering look.

Just a couple tips. :-)

[Airmans Sweetie]

Ok so im like u, goofy & silly in most everything I do. & like u I once to felt like I couldn't b sexy, I would try & try & try! But some how I would always feel like I made it corny or something. But I finally figured it out, my goofiness made me sexy! I was trying too hard & it made me nervous & clumsy.....my poor husband has gotten racked in the crotch so many times wen I was trying to hard. As soon as I just relax & said I am who I am, it was better. Im awkward but I work with it. Now instead of trying to put on the heels & naughty outfits, I just do a silly sexy strip tease with my own music lol or if me & the hubby r next to the bed, ill tickle him so he falls on the bed, then get on top, & try to unbutton his pants......this makes for a good laugh cause im not so good at unbuttoning them lol. Sometimes ill even just throw myself over the bed & wiggle my butt at him & say in a cute funny manner "let's do it!"
there is so much pressure to b sexy, but remember there is a reason he likes u so if ur goofy & silly in normal style then goofy & silly should b sexy in sex too! Embrace it! It makes the sex so much better wen u just relax!

[Airmans Sweetie]

Might I add to that wen I started to relax & b my silly self, my husband relaxed to. He chuckles at my antics & he gets frisky himself. He gets silly right back. I love the response he gives wen im silly versus when I try to hard. He can sense it. Its amazing how responsive he is to me just being me

[demotivator]

High heels and striptease. Eh.
Eyes and smile. If you really want your man your eyes will show it. Like a predator during the chase. "I will get you and there is not a single thing that you can do about it." Attitude is everything.
A little smile because that is d*mn sexy on its own but compared with the right look you will hit the jackpot.
With these two you can seduce a man in your absolute worst outfit.
Striptease is just a nice bonus.

[Meg :)]

Hey.. First off thank you so much for replying and I have to say everyone has such great ideas..

When it comes to heels I used to wear them all the time but since I've been with him not so much so I think I could give that a go but definitely have a quick practise walking in them again first
Texasred your definitely right where you say it'd take my mind off things and thats a very good thing in my case because i tend to over stress about things lol. Oh and I asked him last night after posting on here what he would find sexy and he said he'd like it if I wnet up to his room and just waited on his bed in my underwear for him or something else like that.

The sexy lingerie is a really good idea and Airmans Sweetie I don't think I've laughed so much reading what you've said because all it did was flash images of me doing similar things in my head..I made a nice romantic picnic for us on top of this cliff watching the sunset and I got him in the crotch what seemed like an endless amount of times And I too struggle getting his pants undone but every time I manage to say something and make him laugh about it, I absolutely love the idea of a silly sexy strip tease and I love the idea of the wiggling your bum thing because that is just such a me thing to do and the tickling thing, I really do think I may give them a go

Demotivator...I really like what you said especially about the attitude, I think I'll have to try to pull off the "I will get you and there is not a single thing that you can do about it." look but it may turn into me looking silly which I'll just have to adapt to

[Guest]

Confidence! Confidence! Confidence! Is probably the sexiest characteristic any woman can have, because from confidence everything else flows..... If you aren't confident in yourself and your abilities to excite or turn your man on then you probably won't.

As nearly everyone has said, we men are visual animals, so do something visual, like great him at the door wearing only a rose in your teeth. The strip tease is another good idea and pretty easy to do...buy some "sexy lingerie" (what lingerie isn't sexy?), shake your hips, wiggle your butt, press your breasts together and wiggle them a bit and Voila! Isn't turn on for him.... Then, as you start to remove the pieces of lingerie, turn your back to him, start at the top and remove them s-l-o-w-l-y. Unhook your bra in back, show him you are doing it then keep your chest covered as you turn to face him....drop one cup at a time, oh so slowly...then entice him over for an up close and personal look. Do not allow him to make contact.... in a fun way, push him away... then turn back around, bend over at the waist so your body is bent at 90 degrees and with two hands s-l-o-w-l-y slide your panties down off of your hips, exposing your butt ever so slowly as you go. Let them drop to the floor....turn around. Give him a good view of all of you. Smile confidently!

I wouldn't bother buying a bunch of stuff and if you haven't worn high heels in a while, leave them in the closet. I think ti would be better to be barefoot and confident then in high heels and clumsy!

Enjoy yourself!

[Meg :)]

Seeker_Advice I really do think your idea is great and I'm sorely tempted to just go for it and do that. I think my biggest problem is confidence because I really don't have any but I really want to get over it and just do this to just shock him and give him a good time because I know he really does love it when I come out with a confident comment about myself.
Are there any tips on how to get over my whole fear about everything or do you think it's one of those just let yourself go and go for it things?
I think I really will push myself to try what you've suggested but I have the feeling I'll giggle throughout

And I'll do as you said and leave the heels in the closet because I definitely see myself being clumsy which I think probably wouldn't do anything for my nerves lol..
I'm sure that if I can just relax I really will enjoy especially if his reactions good