X
Collapse
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • stressed
    Veteran Member
    • Jun 2009
    • 1914

    I don't think it's the 'same man' who can make it become boring, as much as the same man doing the 'same things', doing it out of habit, because it's expected of him to do, because he got a sudden erection, and so on. I don't see how it can become boring if the same man makes you feel wanted every time and wants to experiment more than stick to what he can do best.

    After 4.5 years of having been with the same man (ex now) I never got bored with 'him' in that sense, but I did get incredibly bored/frustrated/disappointed/resentful with his use of only 2 sexual positions and him wanting to be the centre of our sexual encounters, which made me think of/look at other men in the end (I didn't cheat but it was heading that way), along with a ton of other sexual issues he had.

    One can try to improve the sex life she has with her man, but if there is no response and if the man won't go to counseling or be honest about his issues, it's just better to let him be and move on, especially when you often find yourself thinking/fantasizing other men. This normally doesn't happen if your man satisfies you, wants you and loves you.

    Comment

    • Hopeless Dork
      Veteran Member
      • Dec 2008
      • 4255

      I think sex with new people is the boring sex... one night stands where they have NO idea what your triggers are, where you aren't comfortable to express your fantasies and desires... bleah thats a no for me.

      Sex with the same man is a beautiful thing, it doesn't have to be boring... if you are not boring... if your partner is open and you are open.. if you both care about making each other feel good -- sky's the limit... it could be a new adventure constantly... but a new adventure with someone you trust, someone you know knows how to satisfy you, someone that you know their body so intimately you can please them with your eyes closed and one hand tied behind your back... there is a magic in that... in being that close to someone.

      Different strokes for different folks I guess.. I have no desire to swap, none... I love finding new ways to excite and please my guy and he is constantly surprising me, after years together... the sex gets better every time we do it... truly. I have not the least bit of interest in some clumsy one night romp with a man that doesnt know me, doesn't care about me... and very likely will have zero idea how to get me off. I love my boyfriends body, his equipment... its my private playground.. Everytime I take his pants off it feels like I'm unwrapping a present, he's beautiful there... and everywhere I just am not into the randomness that could be some other man...

      So to answer your question -- nope -- don't find it boring at all.
      Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

      Comment

      • jns
        Assistant Admin
        • Mar 2010
        • 8398

        There is no reason that sex has to get boring. There is much to explore between lovers. People are constantly changing, so incorporating some of those changes will keep things from getting stale. As long as both keep giving selflessly, the relationship will never be boring, so the sex won't be, either.
        I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
        ...
        Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

        From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

        Comment

        • Guest

          In fact we simply can fantasize it since our mind is not a caged bird and we are at liberty to think the way we like. What demands of more than anything is honesty and few of us can do it. In society we love hypocrisy and to present what we are not mask what we are.

          I want to confess that I fantasize having sex with strangers and I just enjoy though I do not do it for a variety of reasons since I am a social creature and if I refrain from adhering to what the society demands of me I will be doomed to suffer.

          Since this forum bestows a great amount of freedom I want my dreams, fantasies, ideas and beliefs and values unfold unrestricted

          Comment

          • Yamimi
            Member
            • Feb 2011
            • 52

            Well, of course we can fantasize, Wanton, but in actuality I personally still don't think I'd do it.

            Comment

            • Hopeless Dork
              Veteran Member
              • Dec 2008
              • 4255

              For me, even in the privacy of my own mind... I have no desire to be with random strangers... its not a fantasy of mine. I think it would be wrong to assume everyone or even most people would share your specific fantasy, just because you fantasize about something... doesn't mean everyone else is being a hypocrite or just in denial and not admitting to it.. there are people that truly dont desire the same things that you do. And plenty of people that desire things that you don't. You wouldn't want anyone telling you that your favorite breakfast is waffles and you are just ashamed to say... if its not waffles, its not waffles.
              Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

              Comment

              • waya
                Veteran Member
                • Oct 2010
                • 206

                Originally posted by wanton
                I want to confess that I fantasize having sex with strangers and I just enjoy though I do not do it for a variety of reasons since I am a social creature and if I refrain from adhering to what the society demands of me I will be doomed to suffer.
                A sex with strangers fantasy can be fun sometimes but it's not society's view of it that makes it a bad idea. It's the fact that you could get badly hurt. You have thought about that, right? I'm not trying to talk down to you, just want to make sure you're thinking straight.

                Of course, you and your boyfriend could always pretend to be strangers
                Last edited by waya; 02-22-2011, 07:55 AM. Reason: added

                Comment

                • time2discover
                  Veteran Member
                  • Feb 2013
                  • 323

                  After reading your original post and then your different replies I think you should consider being a swinging couple. Seems that it would satisfy your fantasies.

                  To be honest with you, I was married 25yrs and frustrated for lack of adventure sexually and it finally broke
                  us up. But the fact for me was not the man but what he was doing. Today I find myself very horny and in need,
                  but still what I want to find is someone which I will have a connection to and then if we fit go on the adventure
                  road of discovering sex with each other. This could last a lifetime and the adventure never end.

                  To each their own!

                  Comment

                  • Bladyn'smommy16
                    Veteran Member
                    • Feb 2013
                    • 618

                    When you say everyone feels that way. That's your opinion I am happy being with the same man the rest of my life. I've been married for 3 years. Been with him for 4 But if you want to have fantasies about it I guess that's fine for you and if your man wants to too perhaps you should be swingers.

                    Comment

                    • Rhonda14
                      Senior Member
                      • Jan 2013
                      • 186

                      I have been married to the same man for 21 years and we have sex at least 3-5 times a week and it has never been the same. Neither one of us has gotten bored. All we have to do is look at each other and there are sparks. You get out of sex what you put in. I can't tell you all the new things we have learned and explored together over the years. Sex for me with the same man for 21+ years has been amazing and very fulfilling. Our kids, family and friends tell us all the time that they can see the love between us and that we need to get a room.

                      Comment

                      or

                      Womens Health orange logoGet The Newsletter

                      Join our weekly newsletter and get the latest thought-provoking bold research and fearless conversations about sex - plus exclusive product giveaways - delivered to your inbox.

                      Latest Activity

                      Collapse

                      Latest Topics

                      Collapse

                      • PCOS and unwanted hair growth

                        Does anyone have any experience with PCOS and getting rid of unwanted facial hair? What started as one singular strand on my chin in my 20s has turned...

                        07-27-2026, 07:25 AM By Birdie_567
                      Working...