[amaranthine]

Hello all. Been a while since I've posted, but I find myself with a strange problem.

I'm not new to sex. I've had three partners, the last of which is my fiance. His penis is bigger than my other partners'. I'd say eight to eight and half-ish. He's about the size of a half-dollar around.
This might be important because my problem is that he will sometimes get soft during sex, and he says it's because he feels me getting too tight. He's said it's like I "choke" him out.
I know this can't be nervousness or anything like that because I'm not nervous or new to this. But what is going on then??

And what can I do to fix it?

[LanaBear]

Does he say if it gets like this the closer your get to orgasm or is it pretty much from the get go? I know the closer I get to orgasm and throughout my orgasm, the tighter I get.

[amaranthine]

The closer I get to orgasm it happens, but it'll also happen if we go for more than ten minutes. :/
It depends. The better it feels for me, the tighter I seem to get, and then he gets choked. I don't know what to do about it.

[LanaBear]

Maybe getting you to orgasm BEFORE actual intercourse would help? Then continue with foreplay a bit longer until you "loosen" back up again... Then go for actual penis in vagina penetration. It's worth a shot. I'm also a bit tighter immediately after orgasm, that is why I say go back to foreplay for a few after bringing you to orgasm, maybe start with a handjob or blowjob until penetration.

[jns]

Hello all. Been a while since I've posted, but I find myself with a strange problem.

I'm not new to sex. I've had three partners, the last of which is my fiance. His penis is bigger than my other partners'. I'd say eight to eight and half-ish. He's about the size of a half-dollar around.
This might be important because my problem is that he will sometimes get soft during sex, and he says it's because he feels me getting too tight. He's said it's like I "choke" him out.
I know this can't be nervousness or anything like that because I'm not nervous or new to this. But what is going on then??

And what can I do to fix it?

I don't know what you can do to "fix" this, but most guys consider tighter any time during sex to be better. I have only been with super tight women twice and both times it was amazing. Both cases it took some time to get in due to the tightness. I have also been with a woman who could tighten down on me. Again, it was great.

I would say this is more of his problem than yours. Maybe orgasms by you first will get you looser.

[oxy-moron]

As a I male I cant relate to the possibility of being choked out- i.e.going soft- once underway. It should be rock hard. ( Unless he is maybe afraid of hurting you)
How old is he- what is his blood pressure like? general Health?
LanaBears Idea could work as there is always some loosening off after the O.

[WildChild]

Doing kegels will help you have more control but being able to tighten at will is usually the goal sexually. But still control is the key on your part, I don't know about his side of things.

[amaranthine]

Maybe getting you to orgasm BEFORE actual intercourse would help? Then continue with foreplay a bit longer until you "loosen" back up again... Then go for actual penis in vagina penetration. It's worth a shot. I'm also a bit tighter immediately after orgasm, that is why I say go back to foreplay for a few after bringing you to orgasm, maybe start with a handjob or blowjob until penetration.

I've never been able to orgasm without a penetration/clit stimulation combo, so I'm not sure how this will work out... I could keep trying.

[amaranthine]

As a I male I cant relate to the possibility of being choked out- i.e.going soft- once underway. It should be rock hard. ( Unless he is maybe afraid of hurting you)
How old is he- what is his blood pressure like? general Health?
LanaBears Idea could work as there is always some loosening off after the O.

He's turning 25 in April. His blood pressure is in the normal range last we checked (he just had a physical done two weeks ago). As far as general health, he's fine. One thing I note (don't know if it's relevant) is that he is stressed out right now. He's been stressed out before, but the problem that arises with that is the inability to orgasm. But on top of that, we've always had this "choking" issue, ever since the first time we slept together.

[amaranthine]

Doing kegels will help you have more control but being able to tighten at will is usually the goal sexually. But still control is the key on your part, I don't know about his side of things.

I have some practice tightening at will, but I can't seem to stop myself from getting tighter when it naturally happens without me. He suggested looking up relaxation techniques or something like that. I don't know... is there a way to work this in reverse?