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  • jns
    Assistant Admin
    • Mar 2010
    • 8398

    Originally posted by dl51891
    "You don't sound like a loving couple IMO you sound like friends with benefits.

    BTW, how does one move in together in a college campus dorm room? "

    thats how I feel our relationship is going. he's an upper classmen and i live in year round housing and i really dont have an RA.
    I want to commend you for answering back a number of times. Reading the past posts has given me insight in your relationship. I would say that your bf is self centered and does not focus on you. Somewhere 6 months ago or so you finally realized this, but the condition had been going on since the beginning of your relationship. To see if you can salvage the situation, you should have a good heart-to-heart talk with your bf. He may just be carelessly unthoughtful. But, the problems is that guys usually don't change. Yes, they may change for a while to make a situation better, but later they will revert to their old ways. If you determine that the relationship is not salvageable, it is time to move on.
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
    ...
    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

    Comment

    • oxy-moron
      Veteran Member
      • Oct 2010
      • 551

      Sorry if my comments have offended.

      Comment

      • CHANDLERS WISH
        • Mar 2008
        • 22440

        The only time he ever complimented me was his prom 2 years ago. We've only been on 3 dates, in all reality we really don't do anything an engaged couple usually does. We hardly hold hands, kiss (only when he wants me to do something for him or before we have sex), he hardly ever gives me a hug, he never calls when he's gone, doesn't get me anything just because (never did) [when I get him little random bags of candy, cards,stuffed animals, ect] So I guess we really don't have the spark anymore, which really depresses me because he is all I think about. Is there anything to get that feeling back?


        When a relationship gets to the state yours is in someone needs to make the first steps towards getting things on track. Tell him you want regular cuddle nights- At least one date a week and if he does not deliver there will be no sexual interest from you. Do your research as well.
        I think this statement is very spot on.

        We are human, we have feelings, we both sexes, need nurturing, love, hugs, cuddles, little gifts, kind words, or words that make us feel good about ourselves and our relationship.

        SEX for the sake of having sex without an emotional bond will not give you orgasms, how can it? You feel that you are a body not a soul, not a person....

        This man is all you think about yet he brings nothing to the table .... He is not in touch with what constitutes a relationship and you need to discuss this calmly and openly and explain that without affection, love, sex equals sex and you are not a toy, or a body, you are a woman and human...

        It may be that he is all you know and you also so badly want that affection because he has a title, FIANCE, you are setting your thoughts on that, in the want of what he is meant to provide and that is why he's all you think about, it's the meaning of whom he is meant to be to you....

        I think there is a broad spectrum of posters here that combined offer good opinions only you know what you can take from it what relates to you...

        CW
        PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

        Comment

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