[ItsASecret]

How does a woman fake an orgasm? Isn't it a spontaneous, autonomic kind of thing? Do they just moan and say "I'm coming" like they do in porn? Do you try and mimic the vaginal spasm thats supposed to accompany an orgasm?

There is nothing autonomic or spontaneous about it. The decision may be spontaneous but it is a performance act so she is consciously saying "I am going to fake it"...she is making that choice. The woman decides she is going to fake her orgasm so she will mimic what an orgasm may be really like for her. A woman who fakes her orgasm is likely to do it differently than the next woman, there is always a variety. She could simply say "I'm coming" to make it short and sweet, some may get more into it like porn actresses screaming and flailing about turning it into a real scene, though still fake. Some will go as far as heavy breathing, screaming, and squeezing their muscles below to really make it an act.

A guy may have no idea of the difference, especially if she fakes the vaginal contractions. When a guy is so focused on the performance of it or the type of guy that needs to hear screaming or loud moaning to confirm she is having an orgasm all she has to do is do those things and he will believe she is having an orgasm. A man truly in touch with his woman will be able to spot a fake orgasm. For those who focus on only what they think it should be they can easily be fooled.

[a_dub]

A man truly in touch with his woman will be able to spot a fake orgasm. For those who focus on only what they think it should be they can easily be fooled.

Thats reassuring to know. Are there any other tell tale signs? Increased sweating perhaps or more vaginal lubrication? Will fairer skinned women turn red (the so called sex flush)?

[ItsASecret]

Things she could not fake like the flushing or sweating or very increased heart rate. Lubrication is not much of an indicator because she could very well be aroused and all lubed up but that does not equal an orgasm. It all depends on the woman though, if she generally does not sweat or get flushed then it is all just basic trusting knowing your partner well. I do not sweat at all during sex but my cheeks go super bright red when I orgasm no other part of my body does just my cheeks. No orgasm no bright red cheeks in my case.

[shoshannah]

I have actually never faked. Early in our relationship my boyfriend specifically asked me never to fake. He said he would rather me not reach orgasm that to wonder whether I was faking. So I never have. Fortunately, I reach orgasm most of the time and pretty easily these days, so it really isn't an issue. I'm not sure if I would have faked if we hadn't had that conversation--I actually haven't given it much thought. I guess I wouldn't--I would rather have him understand and accept me and my sexuality for what it is rather than put on a show or stroke his ego.

[DreamP346]

Its not so easy to recognize a female orgasm for all. Sometimes women themselves don't even notice it. Everybody is different. Not all women have the explosive Hollywood style orgasms. Not everybody sweats or flushes. Not everybody's contractions are strong enough to be noticed, especially if the man is moving too. Also, all men are different and have different levels of sensitivity. If a woman tells her partner she orgasmed, it would be hard for the partner to think otherwise regardless of how well they were familiar with each other. Remember, even within the same woman, orgasms can be different

[Ashlee T.]

Its not so easy to recognize a female orgasm for all. Sometimes women themselves don't even notice it. Everybody is different. Not all women have the explosive Hollywood style orgasms. Not everybody sweats or flushes. Not everybody's contractions are strong enough to be noticed, especially if the man is moving too. Also, all men are different and have different levels of sensitivity. If a woman tells her partner she orgasmed, it would be hard for the partner to think otherwise regardless of how well they were familiar with each other. Remember, even within the same woman, orgasms can be different

Exactly!!! I have been with guys who would be like "so did you???" "did you now??" "how many times?". The last one......I could have a loud, VERY obvious one and at the end he'd ask "So did you have one? I can never tell". :\ DUHHHHH. lol I think sometimes men are looking for it so hard, they miss it. haha

[Stillness]

I know, at least 95% of the time. Whenever I wonder, the answer is generally no. Once in a while she has when I think she hasn't. She just as often thinks I did when I didn't or thinks I didn't when I did. The difference is I'm always getting one in. For her it doesn't seem to be as urgent. She even stops me if she is going to climax sometimes. I don't get it, but I accept it. I think that If men just accepted their lady's feelings on it instead of trying to impose their own, there would be no need to deceive them.

[Little]

I think that If men just accepted their lady's feelings on it instead of trying to impose their own, there would be no need to deceive them.

100% agreement.