[trying4it]

I am 25 years old and have been sexually active for 6 years and masturbated for many years before that.
I have never had an orgasm on my own or with a partner.
My current partner is generally really into trying to get me off, but he's in a libido lull right now so we aren't having sex.
I have masturbated using my hands, toys, water, etc. and still nothing.
Generally I get very turned on and then just hit a wall and need to stop. I usually cannot physically force myself not to stop and when I just push through things start feeling numb.
I always hear the same old line of, "It takes time."
I get that, however I am tired of swaying back any forth between frustration and acceptance.
I am asking for any advice that anyone can offer to me about this.

[Element]

Try imagining the sexiest thing you can. Let your imagination and sex drive lead you. No matter who you're imaging, or how many people, different positions, different locations, dirty talk you'd like to hear or speak, just let yourself get lost in it. I personally find that not thinking about the finish at all helps a lot. That way there is no pressure to finish, you're just enjoying the moment, the pleasure, and whatever it is that works for you.

[Ashlee T.]

When masturbation or sex starts with the pressure of "maybe I'll have an orgasm this time", then you've pretty much ruined your chances. Or at least it would for me. Back when I pressured myself about having one, I never had one. When I stopped worrying about an orgasm and started relaxing and just really enjoying the activity, I finally had my first orgasm with my partner at the time. I wasn't expecting it and was shocked. haha. That was just the flip of the switch I needed.

Also, maybe you're not using a toy that really suits you. I have seen girls in porn use all sorts of contraptions and most of them wouldn't do a thing for me. If you haven't already try getting yourself a gspot stimulator, preferably one that vibrates and also has clitoral stimulation. It wasn't until I got one of those that I could achieve orgasm by myself.

But first and foremost...ya gotta stop stressing about it. Stress will NOT = orgasm.

[LanaBear]

BD has hit the nail on the head... You cannot stress and get frustrated over it. Eventually your thoughts start to be all consumed by "Darn, when will I have an orgasm" or "Come on, come on, why can't I have an orgasm?" etc... The frustration is a wall that once you hit makes obtaining an orgasm pretty much impossible.

RELAX and keep exploring. It will happen eventually, you just haven't found that button for you yet. Try out different toys, trust me, not all toys are great for everyone. I have a lot and only through experimentation did I find ones that worked or didn't, for that matter, many have met the trash. LOL, for example, I ALWAYS heard great things about the rabbit vibes. In my opinion, those things suck so bad, I used mine once was so disappointed and it hit the trash can right after.

But first and foremost... Forget about having an orgasm, don't focus on it, just have fun with yourself or your partner, relax and enjoy.

[Hugo-B]

As a man I cannot be of much assistance to you here, I've never given a woman her 'first' orgasm either, so nothing to brag about or share there.

I do know a girl who admitted to not ever masturbating or having an orgasm until she was 25, so your situation is not unusual.

I would maybe try one of those rampant rabbit vibrators, I got my ex one and I've never seen a woman climax so fast! (like less than 30 seconds the first time we used it).

Good luck x