[turquoiseblue]

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Please give me advice about how to approach the problem. I'm in a new relationship with a lovely man in his 70's. He ejaculates before we can even get to hugging and kissing. He is very embarrassed and has retreated from even starting. Otherwise everything is great. We are friends and happy, however, this issue is hanging between us and I'm not used to discussing these things. I know that there are books and treatments for the ejaculation issue but do I say something or just leave it alone. Shouldn't he be the one to be writing to a forum?

[Hugo-B]

If he ejaculated before hugging and kissing then you're saying he ejaculates when he leans in for a kiss? Or when, in his mind he becomes aroused? He may be cumming so quick because he's afraid he'll lose his erection which at his age could be a problem for him.

I would get him to take 20mg cialis. No increased heart rate (could be dangerous because of his age) and he'll be able to get hard again straight after ejaculating.

[ItsASecret]

I would get him to take 20mg cialis. No increased heart rate (could be dangerous because of his age) and he'll be able to get hard again straight after ejaculating.

And by that you mean visit a physician for a prescription correct? lol Always tell people to visit a doctor before taking drugs because some think that means take another person's prescription pill or to buy online.

[Hugo-B]

And by that you mean visit a physician for a prescription correct? lol Always tell people to visit a doctor before taking drugs because some think that means take another person's prescription pill or to buy online.

I forgot to mention that, I just though it went without saying

[ItsASecret]

A few methods of helping control premature ejaculation is holding the base of the penis just before that feeling of ejaculation comes. He will know of that feeling and know when to press but if he does that it is supposed to help slow down the feelings, basically by diverting attention, and hopefully he can continue going on without ejaculating. Another thing to do is anytime he gets those tingly feelings he needs to stop until they settle down and then continue with whatever was happening again. So a stop and go method. That does take time to get used to but with continual effort he can learn to control those tingly feelings of ejaculation so that it does not happen so quickly.

[Hugo-B]

IAS that advice is good, and what I would normally recommended, however... (and I'll make an effort here to try and absolve myself from criticisms for the flippant post above, which I hope hasn't offended the OP) I will also endeavor to justify my recommendation of cialis (with a doctor's approval of course).

The guy the OP is referring to is in his 70's. He will have VERY, VERY low testosterone at his age, which is normal. I would estimate his libido is quite low, even if he wants sex once a day every day (a very liberal estimation) the chances are that will be all he can muster for the day. Most men at that age don't have enough testosterone to get a erection, let alone have multiple sex sessions.

Any stop and start technique or squeeze technique is IMPOSSIBLE since the guy (and I'm not being nasty or overly critical) sounds like he suffers from what I can only describe as 'chronic PE' since he cums (in the OP"s words, not mine) "before hugging and kissing". The chance or opportunity to slow him down does NOT EXIST. He is in his 70's, it is unlikely he is going to be able to unlearn the habit now. Also, assuming he has the capacity to climax once a day (which as I said is liberal) multiple daily attempts at slowing him down will be impossible, leaving only one opportunity for an 'attempt' each day.

If his doctor gives the go ahead for calias I don;t see why he shouldn't go ahead and have some fun. OP, I would also have him ask his doctor for a full panel of male hormone blood tests, since they can affect this too. Ask for these to rule out any hormonal problems which could be affecting his libido and sexual performance, as I said men can ejaculate quickly if they think they will lose their erection. These can take MONTHS to sort out, so I still hold that upon the doctor's approval, have a go with the cialis and have a fun 72 hours

-LH and FSH [LH/FSH]
-TT
-FT or bio-T
-E2
-Prolactin [optional in most cases]
-DHT [sort of a waist of time and blood if your testosterone levels are low]
-PSA
-DRE: the dreaded digital rectal exam, doc gives you the finger.


Good luck x

[Hugo-B]

As for approaching the subject with him I would simply reassure him that you sympathize with his situation and that if he pays the doctor a quick visit then a treat awaits him. Men can be very standoffish when women broach any subject relating to a problem affecting their masculinity/sexuality, so expect that, just be sure to reassure him there's a light waiting for him at the end of the tunnel.

[DreamP346]

Talk with your partner and discuss the fact that there is more to sex then a hard penis. This will give you the opportunity to explore other options like toys, role playing, etc.

[Janice Johnson]

My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year now. He has had problems with finishing before I do. It killed his confidence, and was killing our relationship. Being the queen of daytime T.V. I obviously watch Dr. Oz. He recommended a product called Promescent. It saved our relationship and my boyfriend’s confidence.