[sarahboyers1964]

I am a 41 year-old relatively happily married woman who had an interesting thing happen to me a few days ago and I'm curious as to how other women would have been affected by this if it had happened to them..

So what happened was that I was by myself shopping at a Target department store and as I was looking at cleaning products, a man around my age stood next to me and said to me "If I tell you a secret, do you promise not to tell anyone?". I answered "sure". He then put his hand on my shoulder and whispered this into my ear: "I'm married but I think you're extremely sexy and I want to see you on your hands and knees at my place once a week when my wife isn't home....what do you think?". After he said this, I was in a state of shock for a few seconds but of course I said "I'm not interested" to his offer and walked away. The thing that surprised me a bit was that I found myself to be not only shocked by what he said but slightly aroused and since something like this from a complete stranger never happened to me before, I wonder if my reaction is a normal one or if perhaps it's a sign that I'm perhaps not as happy with my sex life in my marriage as I think I am. I did tell my best girlfriend about this (who is also married) and her reaction was "Ewww...that's creepy" and when I asked her if she would have been aroused by something like that happening to her she said "absolutely not".

I'd like to hear from the other women on this board (both single and married) as to how you would be affected by this type of sexually aggressive proposition from a complete stranger. Please be honest!

[Cyndie32]

i believe i would have felt the same way as you. see.... you were not excited about the man that approached you but the idea of it all. it is exciting to know that men still find you attractive.

[BabyGirl]

Target, Walmart. Kmart .
Peekers and Creepers Everywhere ,

What a compliment to you .

If you got that " Tingle " from a compliment, then that just taught you to head for Victoria's Secret or,
K March'e or even the Wally Wonder " section of..

I feel sexy

Or even give you Hubby / SO a gift card to go get You something for SexMas. that means he has to pick out something that He thinks you will look Great in and he would Love seeing you in

The Gift of Sexuality. sometimes needs two ..

[shoshannah]

I probably would have been shocked too. I'm not sure if I would have gotten over it fast enough to tell him off.

That's just inappropriate.

[Euphoric]

I would have declined the offer. I wonder how many other females this guy has approached and the scary thing is that I'm sure it has probably worked for him in the past. I would have moved as soon as he put his hand/arm on my shoulder. But then again, I'm cautious because there are too many nut cases out in the world.

Now, if I were at the beach and I noticed a guy watching, I probably wouldn't think too much of it and take it as a compliment. I think most women want to feel attractive and the fact that I was able to draw the attention of a man would be appealing. It's one thing to have a guy take a second look, but for me, it would be creepy to have a married man proposition me (especially at a local department store).

[Magnetism]

I would feel both shock and flattery. Shocked that it's a socially awkward and blunt thing to do, but flattered that someone finds me that arousing.

[shoshannah]

There is a way to approach a woman without being a creeper. I guess the comment about the beach makes sense. If you're in a club or someplace where it's kind of expected that approaches will happen, there's more leeway as well. But in a Target? No way. When I said i would tell him off, I had overlooked that he put a hand on you. I would have slapped him for sure for that.

[rcoreyus]

Wow, are there really guys that creepy out there? I wouldn't consider going beyond a friendly smile and maybe a "hello" unless I saw some sign of a positive response.

[MiscBrah]

God forbid one guy actually says how he feels! I really don't think he crossed the line. There is nothing wrong with being sexual, it's a bold move for sure but there is nothing wrong with it. He didn't follow you around the store and keep bothering you did he? No. So what is the issue exactly?

That a man had the balls to tell a woman that he wants to have sex with her? You people are making it seem like it's some sick fantasy...

[Little]

Hey MiscBrah, I see you're new to the forum - you should check out the rules. Everybody is expected to treat other posters with respect, even and especially when they disagree with their opinions. You're entitled to be surprised and taken aback by others' responses, but you should tell them kindly why you disagree rather than go on the attack.

If it weren't for the physical touch, I'd probably laugh at this situation and be flattered and yes, probably a little aroused (couldn't be happier in my marriage and sex life!) The flattery would be contingent on the man being around my age, as in your story, and in a well-lit public place. But the physical touch really puts it in a controlling, violating place. A man who wants to approach a woman should do it from a safe distance - for both of them. Touch requires permission. Women with a history of sexual abuse are a major demographic (1 in 4 college-age women!) and a little respect never hurt ... even when the proposed relationship is only sexual.