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  • chaya
    Veteran Member
    • Sep 2010
    • 1819

    My hubby would not let me give him oral, not that I really wanted to. When I almost did it he pushed me away and said to never do that again.
    sigpic
    Not thinking about anything is Zen. Once you know this, walking, sitting, or lying down, everything you do is Zen.
    ― Bodhidharma

    Comment

    • JRod
      Senior Member
      • Jul 2010
      • 141

      I hear ya Lisa W but from I'm seeing here it Must be true. Haha. I pretty much believe my girl cause from the first time to now to 100% better. But it took her 5 years to get here so......who holds back THAT long? Lol

      Comment

      • DreamP346
        • Oct 2011
        • 2053

        My husband could care less about BJs. He said the best thing about it is that it leads to intercourse. He sometimes actually looks bored. And I know its not my technique because I've read all the books and he said it was the same with previous partners.
        Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin)

        Comment

        • LisaW1991
          Senior Member
          • Feb 2013
          • 128

          Bored during sex, WOW, I have never had any guy ever seem anywhere near being bored. Not sure what I'd do if the guy was bored while I was giving him a BJ. I can understand if they were given the choice of one over the other, guys are going to pick intercourse most of the time. I guess most of the guys I've dated aren't having a lot sex, so getting a BJ or HJ is something they really enjoy, its also a good way to get their mind off spending the entire day\evening\etc wondering if they will get to have sex later. I have been on dates where its clear the guy wants to have sex pretty bad, and doesn't want to have dinner, a movie, or some fun, all he's thinking bought is having sex with me later.

          Comment

          • JonDoe
            Veteran Member
            • Sep 2010
            • 444

            If a woman is inexperienced or unenthusiastic then a BJ or HJ can be boring and won't bring me to orgasm. My wife still can't bring me to orgasm via BJ or HJ after 24 years. Early in our marriage, my wife said she needs practice because that is something she never did before we were together. Naturally, I told her she can practice on me anytime! However, that almost never happens. So with her I would say I don't enjoy it, but that doesn't mean I don't like BJs. I have very much enjoyed BJs with women I dated before marriage.

            Ironically, my wife recently said "I think you like this [BJ & HJ] better than sex." She said it as if she was puzzled. Well, I was puzzled too. How can she be so confused or misinformed after all these years? Ironically, she will admit that her orgasms are much stronger from a combined oral and fingering, both vaginally and anally. I wasn't born with this innate gift; I researched, observed and practiced the art of pleasing my wife, which in itself brings me great pleasure. How can she not be interested in bringing me this kind of pleasure too?

            I ask for a BJ less than half as often as I do for sex in general, and am denied more than twice as often. I ask for a HJ whenever she thinks I am taking too long to finish during sex, which for her is more than 5 or 10 minutes. She is well lubricated and enjoying herself, but will abruptly end sex without even asking if I am close, especially if she already had several orgasms from me giving her oral, which is most of the time. She does have vaginal orgasms, but they are not as strong for her as oral. She just realizes that she isn't going to have another orgasm, so "times up."

            I have tried discussing sex with her, but it is something she doesn't like talking about either. I've bought books, but she refuses to read. I've tried educational sex videos, but she refuses to watch. I've asked her to go to a sex therapist, but she refused. I've even offered to show her how I like a HJ, but she refused that too.

            I offer to give her oral after she gets out of the shower before getting ready for work, but she turns down the offer 99.99% of the time. In fact, she just turned it downed this morning. For some reason she associates sex as a weekend activity, not to be performed during the work week.

            Comment

            • Stillness
              WH Poster of the Month April 2017
              • Feb 2012
              • 3679

              I've got conflicted feelings about oral sex. I'm a freaky dude, so there's not too much I wouldn't do or don't enjoy. But I'm also sensitive (inside). The feeling from oral sex is more intense for me than vaginal sex. My wife has given me some very powerfully, moving experiences. But they make me feel vulnerable because of the sounds I make, my movements, the things I say, and the sensations I feel.

              She won't let me return the favor, though. She's orgasmic, but barely lets me touch her vulva with my hands. She's a penis-only type down there. In a relationship where there's already an uncomfortable disparity in our libidos that makes me feel weak and unmanly, I'm not always keen on opening another layer of unevenness with oral sex. On the rare occasions I let it happen, I often hold back and am preoccupied so I don't enjoy it as much. The fact that I don't think she's really that into it makes it even less pleasurable.
              "Those sowing seed with tears
              Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126

              Comment

              • LisaW1991
                Senior Member
                • Feb 2013
                • 128

                I'm always learning something new about sex, even though I started having sex what I was pretty young. It's truly never occurred to me that guys would turn down a BJ or HJ. So far all the guys I've dated and had sex with, there has been very little they didn't like (within mainstream, not talking about fetishes or unusual sex acts). Its been like that since I was 12, I mean just smiling at a guy seems to trigger the possibility of sex to him, and if a guy can't have sex, he'll take whatever he can get (ie BJ or HJ). I've been with a couple of older guys too, and they've been pretty much the same except maybe more experienced\better. My experience has been if they like something better than what is typical\normal, they often suggest something that is a bit unusual, like being tied up or to play out a fantasy. More the once a guy has suggested a taboo relationship fantasy or a rap fantasty.

                Comment

                • I'm On My Way
                  Junior Member
                  • May 2013
                  • 3

                  Personally, I never climaxed while receiving oral, but I only had 1 sexual partner so it might be her unexperience-ness.

                  Comment

                  • CHANDLERS WISH
                    • Mar 2008
                    • 22440

                    Oral is an art.

                    IMHO.. Women can do it wrong, use teeth, hurt the guy, not do it right, start, stop, start.

                    Sometimes a person knows how to masturbate to their own beat. And, therefore, as a result prefer masturbation.

                    So no, not every man likes a BJ in my opinion.
                    PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

                    Comment

                    • tea bagger
                      Junior Member
                      • May 2013
                      • 1

                      I love bjs. They say food is the way to a mans heart. Not me...bjs are

                      Comment

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