[Claret]

my husband said to come to his work at lunchtime for his break because his office has a lock.
i like to and its fun but just wondering if its a good idea or not because hubby was treated for sexual addiction (before i met him) and lost his job because of masterbaring at work.
is it ok for me to do or am i causing a problum?
what would you do?
thanks!

If you go to his office, and he shuts and locks the door, people will know why you are there and what you are doing. I know it sounds very exciting and thrilling but the company he works for probably wouldn't like having him stay around if this is what he does. Even though he gets a lunch break and is entitled to do whatever he wants (legally I guess) during his break, it does not give him the right to do it on company property. The employer has the right to ensure a safe work place for ALL employees and this includes the right to not be subjected to actions of other employees which they might find objectionable.

I, for one, would be quite perturbed if I knew this was going on in the office next to mine. It is NOT professional and if your husband values his job and doesn't want to be fired yet again, you won't do this.

[polly95]

I totally agree about not messing around in the workplace, even though I have had a similar fantasy. I have a home office that I have worked from for many years and a few months ago asked my wife to dress up in sexy lingerie, heels and a faux fur coat and meet me at the office. It was very hot! Maybe something like this will work or you could tell him to meet you at a hotel near his office.

I don't have any direct or indirect experience with sexual addiction so I can't offer any related advice. However, given that he has already been fired once for sexual activity, I think makes a stronger case for making the workplace off limits.

why tried that skype today so he masted in his office with me on screen. maybe thats ok? he masts a lot if we are apart :/

[polly95]

If you go to his office, and he shuts and locks the door, people will know why you are there and what you are doing. I know it sounds very exciting and thrilling but the company he works for probably wouldn't like having him stay around if this is what he does. Even though he gets a lunch break and is entitled to do whatever he wants (legally I guess) during his break, it does not give him the right to do it on company property. The employer has the right to ensure a safe work place for ALL employees and this includes the right to not be subjected to actions of other employees which they might find objectionable.

I, for one, would be quite perturbed if I knew this was going on in the office next to mine. It is NOT professional and if your husband values his job and doesn't want to be fired yet again, you won't do this.

i agree
i guess its hard for them to know when he masts in his office. safer than if i go inside. when he was fired for masting in his last job he had no office but was at a desk with other desks around him. safer in the office.
i'm not addicted but i know how he feels kind of. when my husband leaves for work i want him to stay in bed and its very sad to see him go :/

[Claret]

If he cannot control himself so that he doesn't have to masturbate during the day while at his job at his desk, then indeed the man needs help to deal with self-control issues, and with what is appropriate and not appropriate behaviour.

This man needs to learn proper behaviour and will probably get fired from this job if he doesn't change. Whether he has an office or not it is not appropriate.

[rcoreyus]

Claret is right. Masturbating at one's desk is not normal behavior, and doing so in an open office is really not acceptable anywhere. There is a big difference between having a strong healthy interest in sex, and not being able to control ones self. While I'm sure that occasionally some people will slip off to the restroom to take care of themselves if they really can't stand to wait - I think its normally very rare.

[jen1447]

Hm, maybe not so rare ...

In all seriousness here tho, I'm beginning to wonder about all this. Don't want to be mean but it's starting to not really add up.

[Claret]

None of this posters threads "add" up but I'm trying to give the benefit of the doubt.

[rcoreyus]

OK, my bias is showing, I think its OK for women, but not for men to masturbate at work. (not defending my feelings here, just stating them)

I have a different take on the poster's threads. It seems to form a self-consistent picture, but its one that I find increasingly worrisome. As always on the internet its difficult to detect talented trolls, but that's not my bet on this one.

Hm, maybe not so rare ...

In all seriousness here tho, I'm beginning to wonder about all this. Don't want to be mean but it's starting to not really add up.

[Stillness]

I know what you all mean, but I find this credible. It takes all kinds.

[jen1447]

OK, my bias is showing, I think its OK for women, but not for men to masturbate at work. (not defending my feelings here, just stating them)

I tried looking up the survey I read this in but of course I can't find it now ....it was Cosmo or something like that but they found that the rate of female masturbation in the workplace was significant. I should say prevalence - it wasn't that it was happening all the time, but that I think a majority of women (in their survey anyway) had admitted to doing it.

The difference here is a bit of a double standard imo (see the double standard thread), but sorry, I agree with rcoreyus anyway. This sounds familiar like I said it before recently, but there are dynamics at play that make it fundamentally different - guys have to produce their penis presumably, which would be potentially disruptive, but women can do it much more discreetly. I do.


I'm willing to give Polly the benefit of the doubt too but I find the frequent 'teases' a bit indicative of some other agenda. Maybe she's just a tease lol. (Sorry Polly I don't mean to pick on you.)