[Iwantitall]

Hi All,

I am happily married of 28 years. Sex has diminished over the years for a number of reasons.

When I am intimate with my wife, she says she orgasms and asks if I can feel it. What am I suppose to feel? Obviously she knows when I do, but only going on her word that she did doesn't satisfy my curiosity.

Can someone please tell me what am I suppose to feel from my wife? In other words how can I tell she orgasmed?

Any help or experience would be helpful.

Thanks.

[Stillness]

Female what? Joking.

I rarely feel it because of the movement. When I have it's a rhythmic squeezing.

[jns]

You could feel contractions in her vagina. From your description I take it that she is orgasming from intercourse. If she was orgasming from oral or you masturbating her, I would expect you to have picked up on her other possible symptoms such as her breathing changing and her muscles clenching and trembling.

[kira]

You may not feel anything, especially if you are still moving around. The muscles will contract and can both contract and relax repeatedly or just get tighter. With sexual excitement the vagina gets somewhat longer and narrower from the muscle contractions and tissue swelling with blood and fluid. I've had muscles contracting before reaching orgasm, including even if I never did but got close, and I've had orgasms where everything just locks down tight. Nothing is really a guarantee. That's one of the reasons professionals seem to hate trying to do sexual studies on women. It's very hard to have a control group when no woman reacts to sex the same.

[raydavid11]

Just play an oral sex with her and give some time to feel lovemaking activity....

[bubba29]

my wife sometimes asks me the same thing during intercourse. she usually takes furious pounding to orgasm during PIV. i couldn't feel a 8.0 earthquake during this let alone her little contractions. now if i stopped everything, i probably could feel it. i would say my wife needs to train her PC muscles so those contractions are harder and more noticeable for both of us. when she orgasms from oral, i only can really tell if i have finger on her Ahole. contractions there are hard to miss.

[shoshannah]

It depends on a lot of things: the particular woman, the position, how actively the couple are moving, how strong the particular orgasm is, etc.

My husband can often (usually) feel my orgasm but not always. Aside from the other ways I "tell" him (breathing, tensing up, moaning as I get close and then crying out when I get there, etc.) he can feel my vagina clench up and then begin quickly squeezing and releasing his penis. He finds it extremely exciting and it usually makes him reach orgasm himself. But as I said, he doesn't always feel it. There's nothing wrong if you can't-- every couple is different,

If this is a big deal, I can suggest a couple of things. Have your wife do keel exercises to strengthen her vaginal muscles. You can also have her do them when you have your penis or a finger inside her so she can tell you exactly when she's doing them so you can concentrate on whether you feel them. Its much the same sort of feeling as when a woman has an orgasm.

[Little_Man_in_the_Boat]

One cannot miss a powerful orgasm !!! What you will notice is her keegle muscles starting to contract around your penis, which is quite a shock if your not expecting it to happen.
Your penis will be locked into her vagina because the head of your penis is like a mushroom making it difficult to withdraw and its this tight constriction that really sends you through the roof the pleasure or sensation is overwhelming. So its its this slow constriction until the sensation is just too great and you ejaculate !! Im not joking when I say it just about lifts your head off !!! LOL

[NicoleEDutra]

The specific contractions might feel far more intense for her than they are ‘outward’ (meaning that you could feel it yourself). Another great way to tell what is going on is by her stomach, pay attention to what her stomach muscles are doing, you’ll notice that they contract, tighten and then release, almost as though she is not in control of herself. Just because you are not feeling what you feel does not mean you are doing anything ‘wrong’.

[jen1447]

I've seen all kinds - from total body shakes that last like 90 seconds to those silent O's that seem like they're more meditative. Point is there's no sure-fire way to detect one. Do you absolutely need to? It's possible she may not always orgasm and still be satisfied.

If she says she's good and you don't get the sense she's lying, just accept it. No woman likes orgasm quizzes, status updates, or interrogations, no matter how fascinating it is to you. Ironically, the only time it's really okay to ask if she came is when you already know she did.