It sounds like you're not exactly a 'silly' woman when it comes to your values and sensibilities ....you're career minded, driven, empathetic with people and things in your life, creative, and you have hopes and ambitions. Just a thought here but maybe it's time you think a little less of yourself as a girl than a woman. You're young, but you've got the mindset of a responsible adult already. That may sound a bit foolish but self-image has a lot to do with sex, and something as simple as self-identifying with a certain mindset (that of a firmly established woman with both feet on the ground) can help your confidence and 'gravitas,' so to speak. No one's going to judge the faces you make during sex because you're beyond that, no one's going to evaluate your thighs because you're not in school anymore and real people understand other real people. You're you and every part of you comes with the package, and all those parts are pretty **** awesome because you're someone to be reckoned with. Be the woman you want to be hon, have some girl-balls, and show the world what you're made of. 
One way that you can help emphasize this quality in yourself is to look in the mirror and practice your 'serious' look. This isn't a mean look or a crabby look or a hardass look, it's just the look of an adult woman - what you want other people see when they look at you. If you find that look in the mirror, you can wear it with confidence when you're out and about, and you can rest assured that other people are seeing you the way you want them to. (You can have a serious smile btw ....looking happy and capable at the same time can actually be a huge turnon.)
One way that you can help emphasize this quality in yourself is to look in the mirror and practice your 'serious' look. This isn't a mean look or a crabby look or a hardass look, it's just the look of an adult woman - what you want other people see when they look at you. If you find that look in the mirror, you can wear it with confidence when you're out and about, and you can rest assured that other people are seeing you the way you want them to. (You can have a serious smile btw ....looking happy and capable at the same time can actually be a huge turnon.)
I definitely understand what you mean about "real people understanding real people," because my girlfriend and I are both that sort of person. It would make sense that my confidence and self-image would carry into my sex life. When I start out with things I'm unfamiliar with, I tend to be very timid and self-analyzing, and I ask for a lot of input from other people, while I'm still learning and shaping the way that I do whatever it is I'm trying to do. Eventually I find my footing and build from there, and get my confidence through my learning-by-doing. I suppose sex is the same way. Few people are immediately amazing at any given thing right out of the gate, right? Especially if they have little to no experience with anything similar, the way I don't have much experience with the physical aspect of relationships - most of mine have been long-distance. So I'm sure I'll get there, and she will too, and you're right - I just need to have a little confidence that I'm capable of doing this, even if I can't do it today. I will someday! 
) Special bonus for you too - in my experience, women are much more intuitive with love making, so you'll probably get there even quicker. Enjoy the ride! 
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