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  • amy40
    Veteran Member
    • Nov 2016
    • 2732

    lack of sex and divorce

    found lack of sex on a list of 10 reasons people get divorced
    since it makes the other person feel unloved
  • Stillness
    WH Poster of the Month April 2017
    • Feb 2012
    • 3679

    Originally posted by amy40
    found lack of sex on a list of 10 reasons people get divorced
    since it makes the other person feel unloved
    Yeah, I bet! It's probably right near the top. The only things I could imagine possibly beating it would be sex with someone else and money issues...maybe child-rearing conflicts. All the other issues become smaller if you're getting some good, regular lovin'.

    I love my wife and think she's a nice person to hang out with, but I was an only child and do pretty well by myself. I got married for the sex. Without the erotic, a spouse is a glorified roommate.
    "Those sowing seed with tears
    Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126

    Comment

    • muffin70
      Veteran Member
      • Aug 2013
      • 384

      Yes, there are obviously some people out there who are not happy with their sex life or lack of it in their marriage.... and instead of talking to their husband / wife about it, they cheat and eventually get divorced.....
      Communication is the key to any relationship / marriage.
      I married my wife because I love her as a person and love to be with her... the fact she has large breasts that turn me on every time I see them is a bonus!

      Comment

      • Maisie Dayz
        Member
        • Mar 2017
        • 68

        Whilst I think sex is an important part of marriage, I don't think it's the be all and end all. For example, if my husband was unable to perform due to illness/accident or something, I wouldn't divorce him as my love for him isn't defined by sex. Neither would I find someone else to fill the void. I love him as a whole person, not just for his prowess under the sheets.

        Comment

        • muffin70
          Veteran Member
          • Aug 2013
          • 384

          there's an old saying "woman who complains there is no magic in the marriage - will soon make husband disappear"!

          Comment

          • amy40
            Veteran Member
            • Nov 2016
            • 2732

            Originally posted by muffin70
            there's an old saying "woman who complains there is no magic in the marriage - will soon make husband disappear"!
            interesting

            Comment

            • atskitty2
              Assistant Admin
              • Aug 2013
              • 4467

              Well I think it has a lot to do with why there is a lack of sex. It can be so for many reasons and that is important.
              I have little time to elaborate, but if there's mismatched sex drives and one is simply unable/unwilling to satisfy, or is it issues with the relationship that has caused a lack of intimacy and sexual closeness?

              So many possibilities.

              Comment

              • a_dub
                Veteran Member
                • Dec 2011
                • 514

                Lack of sex is probably caused by some other issue rather being the cause of the issue. That being said, I don't know much abut relationships.

                Comment

                • Romy
                  Veteran Member
                  • Jan 2014
                  • 339

                  Originally posted by Maisie Dayz
                  Whilst I think sex is an important part of marriage, I don't think it's the be all and end all. For example, if my husband was unable to perform due to illness/accident or something, I wouldn't divorce him as my love for him isn't defined by sex. Neither would I find someone else to fill the void. I love him as a whole person, not just for his prowess under the sheets.
                  I don't know how old you are or what your libido is like or how much you value sex as a way to express love or even how long you've been together among so many other things but until you are actually in the situation where your husband cannot perform you cannot say what you would be like after a few years. If you are in your 30s for example and suddenly your husband could no longer perform.....I believe a few years down the track you would feel a void and I say this assuming you like/enjoy sex. Lease don't take this in a way that I'm trying to have a go....it's just that until you're in the situation you really don't know despite all your good intentions.

                  Comment

                  • Maisie Dayz
                    Member
                    • Mar 2017
                    • 68

                    Originally posted by Romy
                    I don't know how old you are or what your libido is like or how much you value sex as a way to express love or even how long you've been together among so many other things but until you are actually in the situation where your husband cannot perform you cannot say what you would be like after a few years. If you are in your 30s for example and suddenly your husband could no longer perform.....I believe a few years down the track you would feel a void and I say this assuming you like/enjoy sex. Lease don't take this in a way that I'm trying to have a go....it's just that until you're in the situation you really don't know despite all your good intentions.
                    No offence taken :-)

                    I don't believe my age or libido affect my view.
                    I married my husband because I love him and although I agree that sex is a way of expressing love, it's not the only way.
                    Wanting sex or needing it, are two different things. I may want it but i don't need it, even having children can be achieved these days (adoption, IVF etc) without it.
                    Having a partner I love & trust, with whom I can share my life is more important than one single element of a relationship. The void of a person who is no longer there is deeper and harder to fill and it's not love if you can walk away when something fails.

                    Of course it's a totally different matter if one is withholding sex because they do not love the other.


                    Comment

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