[amy40]

sometimes think we're made for each other; other days think we are so opposite that I wonder what's going on
how is that possible?

I guess when we're somewhere having fun as a family or after we've had sex and cuddled up, I think all's right

but now that it's been more than "3 wks" and it seems we've had no time to even talk by ourselves this wk except couple min here and there AND he made plans to go out sat eve (tonite) but forgot to even tell me til yest
.......I'm at the "what is going on" stage again


not referring to the yrs we didn't have sex, either as we BOTH were so invested n being good parents, I'm sure part of that was probably my fault somehow, too

but I'm talking about now
how even tho we've been married long time, it feels like sometimes I'm married to a stranger

[amy40]

in case u think........he's going out with a married relative and drink beer so no he's not having an affair

[Stillness]

I think of sex as the concrete of the marriage. The bricks that form a house may be uneven and not fit together quite right. There are gaps, but the concrete fills them up, bonds them together, and makes the foundation solid.

You need sex and intimacy to bond or you start feeling the gaps.

[amy40]

guess I'm feeling the gaps because last wkend we were at a small concert and while he was off doing crafts with kid, I was saving our seats

this super good looking musician came and talked with me and the whole time concert was going on, all I could think about was wonder what it would b like with that musician......

don't think I would have been thinking that if he hadn't come up and spoke with me
must have been that a good looking guy came up and spoke to ME and he was so talented, playing multiple instruments

[atskitty2]

^^and that is one reason and example of why it's important to put all fires out at home. A person is more open to temptations and prone to give in eventually, when their needs aren't being met, especially long term.

What are you two going to do when kid has left home in 10 yrs? A couple's relationship still has to be cultivated and nourished during the child-raising years.

[amy40]

A couple's relationship still has to be cultivated and nourished during the child-raising years.

I know!
I'm the thinking one in our relationship as I think about "us" and that's why this concerns me

my thoughts have not been good lately

[Texasred]

You either need more thinking or more sex...
Or Option 'C' - more martinis. Option 'C' has gotten me through many years when the sex was nonexistent, and and now through the times when the sex is... not very good.
Just make sure you use a good gin...