[Texinator]

What? lol

Sorry, I was just being stupid silly.

[Amber]

Sorry, I was just being stupid silly.

I know you were. That is why I put the lol (laughing out loud) symbol. I was just wondering what on earth you were thinking. I could only imagine.

[Texinator]

I'm not sure my mind knows what to hear to become aroused anyways. I'm probably sounding quite stupid right now but that is how I'm feeling right now. That is why I had asked for a website. I need it lay out to me. I know it won't just come to my mind naturally, at least nothing that would arouse me.

With most body parts you try to go for something sensual. Something descriptive. Like with your arms 'I love the smooth skin on my tone arms' or your legs 'I love my strong, powerful legs' or 'I love my sexy, slender legs' Talk about your face and your luscious lips and shimmering eyes..

You can get even more imaginative with private parts. For example something sexy would be 'I love caressing my warm and wet vagina' Or you can kick it up all the way 'I love playing with my throbbing clit and plunging my fingers deep into my hot and dripping p*ssy'

There is really no set formula with this, and the trick with some people is that they already have to be aroused before this turns them on, otherwise they just find it corny.

[WildChild]

Watching a guy stroke himself may set most women off but it doesn't for me. Maybe because I have never watched a guy do that to himself in real life.

Really, I don't find it particularly exciting either. I mean, what am I getting out of it? Nothing. He's getting off and .... Well, good for him. That means he's out of commission for a while and I'm not. Women can orgasm manually and move right in to intercourse and orgasm more, probably even more intensely. He's done. What's to get worked up about? Guys do themselves so hard and fast, it really is wham, bam, done.

You might find some really steamy, romantic, love scenes far more arousing than porn. Just imagining yourself on the receiving end.

[ItsASecret]

Really, I don't find it particularly exciting either. I mean, what am I getting out of it? Nothing. He's getting off and .... Well, good for him. That means he's out of commission for a while and I'm not. Women can orgasm manually and move right in to intercourse and orgasm more, probably even more intensely. He's done. What's to get worked up about? Guys do themselves so hard and fast, it really is wham, bam, done.

Same here, during sex type things one of my most common questions is "well what is in it for me?", since I know that 3 minutes of anything that I do will result in him finishing.

For me the only that that works to get the thoughts going is the literature stuff. Just little sex stories that people put together. I have an extremely hard time getting any pleasure out of anything so I figured if I can think about sexy things (needs to be provided by someone else or I will not think to think of it) then I can get more pleasure going at any given moment. My method of reading that stuff and trying to get one of those images to pop in my head at any given time has not provided the results I want but it does not take 45 minutes to get a tingle anymore!...more like 30 lol. Baby steps, but it is enough for me to keep trying.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I totally agree with Tex.

I would say I have always been sensual. But around a year and a half ago, I started learing the true meaning of the word. I would be able to for instance, sit in a silk summer dressing gown, which would be half over my body and only show one leg and half of my right breast not all, as an example and look down and think? That's sexy, then I would "feel" mentally the material on my leg and feel sexier, sensual.

I would pay attention to what I wore and walk out the door feeling sensual, even hearing a bird cherp was beautiful, or the sway of a tree, glistening water, it all looked beautiful...

Taping into the sensual side, seemed to make everything beautiful and inside, feeling that nothing negative, no stress, those feelings thoughts never occured during this period, nothing got to me, life was beautiful.

haha, hard to explain and certainly I need to go back there more, it's still within me, but I need to tap into it more, I can't describe the feeling that I had day upon day upon day at that time of my life.

CW

[Texinator]

Yup, it doesn't even have to be limited to your body but also works well with other things that stimulate the senses, from your clothes to birds chirping underneath a beautiful sky.

Like WC said, even though lots of people call it dirty talk, don't think of it as dirty but as sensual communication. Become more aware of what your senses tell you and learn to communicate that. Say it out loud rather than just in your mind if that helps.

The objective is to form a stronger bond between your senses and your mind. You may very well come to find a lot of things sexy that you had never thought of like that before.

[Texinator]

As for actually touching his privates, what does a woman think when they are touching that? The only reaction I can think of is either you know it is pleasing him or maybe you have the power to please him.

I would think so. A few women also think penises have an aesthetic appeal.

Here is how it works with me with the female anatomy: I find vaginas extremely beautiful. I find female orgasms extremely beautiful. So the idea of not only touching and licking a beautiful vagina but through my touching and licking also being able to give a woman a beautiful orgasms has the power to divert large quantities of blood in me.

[Amber]

Really, I don't find it particularly exciting either. I mean, what am I getting out of it? Nothing. He's getting off and .... Well, good for him. That means he's out of commission for a while and I'm not. Women can orgasm manually and move right in to intercourse and orgasm more, probably even more intensely. He's done. What's to get worked up about? Guys do themselves so hard and fast, it really is wham, bam, done.

You might find some really steamy, romantic, love scenes far more arousing than porn. Just imagining yourself on the receiving end.

Well, at least I'm not the only one who doesn't find that interesting.

WC, I wonder if the steamy love scenes would be better for me. Are you talking about the type of movies that you would get in the same store as the porn or are you talking about regular movies?

needs to be provided by someone else or I will not think to think of it

ItsASecret, I'm the same way. That is part of my problem.

For me the only that that works to get the thoughts going is the literature stuff. Just little sex stories that people put together.

I'm curious to know where you find the stuff that you read. I wonder if that kind of stuff may help me.

[Amber]

I totally agree with Tex.

I would say I have always been sensual. But around a year and a half ago, I started learing the true meaning of the word. I would be able to for instance, sit in a silk summer dressing gown, which would be half over my body and only show one leg and half of my right breast not all, as an example and look down and think? That's sexy, then I would "feel" mentally the material on my leg and feel sexier, sensual.

I can relate to this a little bit. When I wear the silky, sexy babydoll, it makes me feel sexy. Feeling it against my skin, the way it falls on me or maybe the way it slips partly off me. That is when slowly touching my legs feels different to me, more sexier to me. I just feel it but to actually put words to it, doesn't work for me because it doesn't come natural. I'm not sure if feeling this way actually arouses me though. Maybe that with a steamy movie might. I don't know.

I would pay attention to what I wore and walk out the door feeling sensual, even hearing a bird cherp was beautiful, or the sway of a tree, glistening water, it all looked beautiful...

This reminds me some of what WC said in the beginning about your senses. I still haven't got use to what is around me like this yet.