[idon't]

???Confused about his sexuality(part 2)!!##!#!

Hi everyone!Those who read my last post(is he bisexual?) are familiar with the situation.I 've been wondering if my boyfriend's bi or not,after some random signs and some gay sites he had visited.So decided to talk to him.First he wouldn't admit he had entered those sites but then i kept pushing him and he said yes.He said to me "I wanted to see if i like it or not"(while he has been doing this since he was 13!). I told him that all these things didn't match with a streight guy's behavior and that i had the right to know etc...I said "Just admit it!That doesn't mean i'll dump you!" and he kept silent,then gave me a hug and started to cry.He didn't say "yes" but this act proved me right,i think.Then i started to ask him questions,like "How do you express this part of yourself?"(he has never experienced anything sexual with a guy) and he said "Well,i don't know,maybe sexualy sometimes but that's it".What i understood was that he masturbates to gay porn sometimes.The next day i told him that i was feeling kind of uncomfortable to the thought that he may be masturbating to gay porn and he acted like he never said or meant to say that and that all he meant by sexualy was "if i ever got interested by men that would be ony sexual" and he got mad!Then he told me that he might have a tendency to be bi but it's only a small,not important part of him,that he will always want to have a girlfriend because that's the way he wants to live,that he wants a family etc and not because he's afraid but because he doesn't feel the need to discover anything related to the same sex and that he doesn't like it.What do u think?? Cauze I don't know what to think anymore...

[idon't]

Anyone here?? :-p

[p3375]

Seems to me your b/f is in the process of discovering himself. Who knows what he will find?

[lilylavendar]

idon't your doing the right thing talking to him about. showing some support for him. the violence part is not good, no matter what the situation is. sounds like he is frustrated with himself, and may be taking it out on you.
this is really an odd time for me to be reading/writing about this, because right now i am in the opposite situation with a boyfriend. we've been friends for a long time, and started dating recently. but i am also dealing with the fact that i have feelings about other women, not particulary anyone i am around. the sex part for me is not that important. i've always dreamed about women since i was young, and grew up in a homophobic home also. i got married and had kids. married an abusive alcoholic and then divorced. i was on my own for several years, and recently started to try dating again. and of course it was with my friend. whom i had been talking to again for over a year. we were intimate, then he is out of town working alot. so we talk, but don't see each other often. but recently i feel sad because i want to explore this side of me, but don't want the local stigma from it. i live in the deep south u.s., small towns. and i have kids. no matter how much i would love to be "friends" with another woman, this pains me because it seems so frowned upon here. my "boyfriend" knows, and we've talked about this. he seems supportive, but also told me we would still be at least friends no matter what. we respect each other. and this is new water for me. to come out and say these things, because i feel like i'm not a lesbian, but that i must be for my feelings and longing for that relationship i don't have. sexually i'm turned on in that area. but i don't just want that. there is so much more involved, way long to explain here. ultimately, you are doing the right thing talking about it. but it seems sad for you, what do you want from your relationship? i don't think i could handle someone being with someone else. and still be together. but that is just me. maybe he needs some time alone to explore his true feelings about it. that is what i am going to do.
or trying to do anyway. in the end though, i know what i want. i just may have to wait awhile about exploring that area, i don't want to complicate things with my kids, or find someone and have to hide things. not a happy way to live.

[idon't]

Hi.Thx fr ur story.From what i got,u never had sex with a woman or even made-out,right?and now u feel the need to explore this.Well,is it possible for someone who is/might be bisexual to never want to experience?My bf tells me that he doesn't want to.That it's just a curiosity,like wanting to try on drugs.He gave me an example of how he doesn't feel the need to discover anything and said "I'd like to know how cocaine feels like but i won't cause it's not the lifestyle i want to follow". That to me shows fear because it's something that's not aproved, although he said it's not fear but it's only that he doesn't like it.I don't want to end up married to this guy,not knowing he's strugling pushing this part of himself away and that i may be an obstacle to he's freedom.Or i don't want him to watch gay porn secretely,it makes me feel like an idiot.So is it possible that he'll never feel the need to experiment?