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  • Magnetism
    Veteran Member
    • Jan 2009
    • 1060

    Effy-I got upset out of insecurity. I do like him, and I got so scared that he lost interest or didn't care. Again, it's a "I hurt you, before you hurt me thing". I was trained that a man that really likes you will not text you last minute or put other priorities above you. You're right that he can't ignore a job interview in my town that will not only help him both him professionally, but him taking a job here also will help me see him more. Not seeing him in person will also deprive me from getting to know him and his actions in person.
    "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

    Comment

    • soph_walker
      Junior Member
      • Oct 2014
      • 8

      Originally posted by Magnetism

      Two weeks went by since our first date, and I decided to wish him a happy holiday today (it's our festival in my religion). He wrote back enthusiastically saying, "Thank you so much!", and I then asked a question. It's been a day since I've heard from him. I try very hard not to be needy and clingy, but I can't help and wonder if a lack of texting is a sign of disinterest. Do a google search and I'm seeing all of this, "If he's really into you, he would take the time to text back. Busy is another word for ****************************."
      Hello, just reading what you said about wondering if a lack of texting is a sign of disinterest. This is one of my bug-bears, but I think women and men use texting to different ends.

      In my humble opinion, I think women tend to dissect the content and tone, even the amount of kisses in a text from a guy, not to forget how long it took him to text (or reply to a msg) in the first place.

      I know me and my girlfriends have sat and discussed texts from a guy many times haha, but I just don't think men would sit and think about a text they received from a woman or what certain things meant, or the amount of kisses at the end of a text.

      Comment

      • Magnetism
        Veteran Member
        • Jan 2009
        • 1060

        Based on his behavior and actions in person, I've changed how I felt in the original post. To reject this man based on his texting habits would be rejecting a lot of other good qualities that he has. I'm not perfect, and I would be upset if someone rejected me for my flaws (worrying a lot, being emotional, or being fearful of someone's lack of interest). My instincts are that a person's actions face to face are much more valuable than savvy phone behavior. Just bc a guy is savvy on the phone doesn't mean he's a quality partner in other aspects.
        "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

        Comment

        • Boyka555
          Junior Member
          • Oct 2014
          • 3

          Originally posted by Magnetism
          He just texted back saying he's coming to town this Sunday for his family, but I'm going to bed. Stillness-I suspect this man is introverted, which is why I wonder if texting and phones isn't a favorite of theirs. I'm introverted too, but I do enjoy deep texting convos lol
          Yeah, there are different kinds of people. I don't like texting or skypeing myself sometimes, though i do it, but if it's not his thing, try to ask him out.
          "You know you’re kinda, sorta, basically, pretty much always on my mind" - houfy.com

          Comment

          • Magnetism
            Veteran Member
            • Jan 2009
            • 1060

            Originally posted by Boyka555
            Yeah, there are different kinds of people. I don't like texting or skypeing myself sometimes, though i do it, but if it's not his thing, try to ask him out.

            No worries boyka-He has no problem asking me out.
            "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

            Comment

            • Something_Awesome
              Veteran Member
              • Apr 2014
              • 1219

              Originally posted by Magnetism
              Based on his behavior and actions in person, I've changed how I felt in the original post. To reject this man based on his texting habits would be rejecting a lot of other good qualities that he has. I'm not perfect, and I would be upset if someone rejected me for my flaws (worrying a lot, being emotional, or being fearful of someone's lack of interest). My instincts are that a person's actions face to face are much more valuable than savvy phone behavior. Just bc a guy is savvy on the phone doesn't mean he's a quality partner in other aspects.
              My GF used to give me crap about my texting. She used to hate how short my responses were, and how I would not respond quick enough. But then she made friends with girls whose boyfriends were the same way. The girls would make fun of our texting habbits collectively (I know because I was there one time). She'd laugh of course... But not because the subject matter was so hysterically funny, but because she realized that It's just the way that I am with regard to texting and that it has nothing to do with her or how I feel about her

              There is a reason why most guys are crappy texters (it has nothing to do with communication skills or a lack of interest in you), but I'm not going to get into it at this hour.
              "Are you serious? You're bleeping THAT girl?" - jen1447

              Comment

              • atskitty2
                Assistant Admin
                • Aug 2013
                • 4467

                SA! Nice to see you!

                Comment

                • Magnetism
                  Veteran Member
                  • Jan 2009
                  • 1060

                  Funny that you guys bumped up this topic, because now he's texting way MORE, is cute with his conversations, and is coming off as more organized/responsive with making plans. I'm also showing more interest in him at this point. When I wasn't showing much interest in the beginning, that's also when he wasn't texting much.
                  "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

                  Comment

                  • Something_Awesome
                    Veteran Member
                    • Apr 2014
                    • 1219

                    Originally posted by atskitty2
                    SA! Nice to see you!
                    Nice to see you too! I think I'll be visiting much more often now. My schedule is going to really free up after this Sunday. Right now I am recovering from surgery on my foot/ankle (I'm not allowed to put the slightest amount of weight on it for 2 weeks). So I may be posting here A lot!

                    Also, I've had something I've been meaning to post about for a while... May post about it soon...

                    Originally posted by Magnetism
                    Funny that you guys bumped up this topic, because now he's texting way MORE, is cute with his conversations, and is coming off as more organized/responsive with making plans. I'm also showing more interest in him at this point. When I wasn't showing much interest in the beginning, that's also when he wasn't texting much.
                    My bet is that he will go back to his old texting ways. Just don't take that as him not being that in to you.
                    "Are you serious? You're bleeping THAT girl?" - jen1447

                    Comment

                    • Magnetism
                      Veteran Member
                      • Jan 2009
                      • 1060

                      Originally posted by Something_Awesome



                      My bet is that he will go back to his old texting ways. Just don't take that as him not being that in to you.
                      Maybe, but my bet is that he will continue to be more communicative. He's showing a much different side than what I've presented in the original post. Only time will tell though.

                      Frankly, I'm the same way. I'm very reserved and hold back around a lot of people, but I open up and reveal myself once I know a person better and I know how they feel about me.
                      "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

                      Comment

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