[WildChild]

There will be an adjustment time. What little things make would make you happy? Sometimes a thing will just pop into my head - once woke and said, "I need more purple in my life." So I got a can of paint (found just the right dark purple in the miss mix bin - synchonicity) and painted my sewing tables and shelving purple. When I looked at it I felt happier, still have them purple.
After my last move, money was tight but I needed some color so I got some lovely dark green towels and some purple ones. The color purple stimulates creativity and thought, I'm rather big on it.
Go look at a candle display, forget what will match anything. What draws you?
Or as CW suggested plant a few flowers, digging into the earth is very healing, releases negativity and grounds you. Get a wimsical statuette to put in your garden area. When you walk up to your door there should be something that brings a smile.

[happy ending]

i can see the sea from my house. its beautiful and never fails to lift my spirits. do you live near the ocean, just sitting on the beach looking at the water and being can do wonders. hope things work out well for you - you certainly deserve it.

[mdraven380]

Happy ending,
No I don't live near the ocean but wish I did. I live a filthy dirty city full of crime. You can hear gun shots going off half the time and people are just shooting each other up like it's the wild wild west. I stay in the house and pretty much keep to myself.


Well after 3 weeks of texting back and forth. Scott's last text to me was,
"ummm so loving someone and careing about someone are 2 different things?"
I had texted him to ask why he still wanted me in his life and he said because he cared about me. I told him that's not the same as if he would have said he still loves me and wants to make it work. He wanted to move out no matter what. But he wanted to still see me when he was able to fit me into his schedule. It hurts to much to deal with that.

Now he has stopped texting me. I sent him one last e-mail to state my opinion today. Probably shouldn't have done that. Now I look like the weak one.

I'm alone every night now and it is really getting to me. At least when we were argueing through text I still had some kind of connection with him and maybe a little hope that he might see that he made a mistake.
It feels the same as it did when my mom died and I was here alone all the time. I feel sick to my stomache and angry because I never thought I'd have to live through this again. This lonliness and emptiness, it feels like it will kill me. I feel like I'm crazy with grief. He was able to obtain everything he wanted but here I sit with my head still spinning wondering how this happened again.
Now that all the ties are completely severed I'm having a very difficult time moving on. My heart actually hurts. This is not fun at all. I tried everything in my power to avoid this. Now I feel like I should have just accepted all the lying and whatever he was doing to me so that I wouldn't have to suffer this pain of lonliness.

[Guest]

ok...let me say a few things...
1-you are a woman,not a dvd..he cant just press pause and press play whenever he wants.he made a choice to leave without even discussing it,he needs to deal with his choice.
2-im sorry about your father,i am having problems with my parents and declining health so i understand,have you looked into support groups?

[Guest]

oh dear...let her have him. gah!

[mdraven380]

oh dear...let her have him. gah!

That's what everyone said.
Good now I don't feel so bad. All my friends said that we didn't look that good together. But I was basing my feelings on how he treated me. Until thaat is of course when he started treating me like .

[CHANDLERS WISH]

mdraven. MDRAVEN. mdraven.

I thought your photo was one of some model.. It is so beautiful and hot and then the close up even more so... I am shocked and I'm sorry, people choose alternative photos but this is actually you? Wow.

Okay, now that that is of my chest.

Think of this:-

predator:-

An interaction between two organisms of unlike species in which one of them acts as predator that captures and feeds on the other organism that serves as the prey.

This is what he is after, this is who he is.

2 marriages, 2 relationships, long hair, eyes that ooze sex, that being he thinks he's sexy, personally If I saw him I would run because I would know from those eyes, being a witch and all that, he's a predator.

EGO - and low self esteem, I disagree with your counselor.. He is ego driven :-

" Will you lay your life down for me?" His words.

" 13 years together, love with all my heart, would do anything for you" ex-wife, even though she re-married... He cast a spell.

Love letters, proclaiming their love - "he cast a spell"..

EGO driven.. has no comprehension what so ever what love is about, 2 marriages, 2 relationships, doesn't hear, doesn't listen because all he wants is control, all he wants is all women to fall at his feet like God...

Band: women falling all over him, giving to him from a young age. Guess what? He's getting older and those groupies will be long gone soon, long gone and he no longer will have control over women.

Predator? Because you were vulnerable, let alone as I said hot and sexy... He saw the writing on the wall and could take the control but you didn't speak the words the ex-wife did, does hence why he keeps sleeping with her too... Control.

He kicked all women out because it was his house, it was no longer what he needed... This was yours and you kicked him out...

Off course, they will treat you well in their own way, enough for you to feel that you are being treated well and forget the intuition especially through things that are going through your life and their not there for you, just hug you and then you feel they love you.

This man is bad news.. I can see it in his makeup.. The top, the long hair screams, "I'm hot", hence why he liked you, your hot...

He has no comprehension of what love really is only possession, predator like personality, control and kind of evil, wanting you to "lay your life down for him"... sorry that's kind of evil in my books.

HE LOVES HIMSELF BIG TIME.

Anyways, now that I am only slightly mad not fully angry lol, cut contact with him fully please....

These types of personalities can destroy you and bring you down so far that you don't know how to get up.

Just be angry and no longer be hurt...

Marylin Manson comes to mind with this guy and I bet if he wanted a Cult they would follow him.

They will real you in, like a fishing line and then send you out and then real you in again.

He said... Love and Care are the same? You know they are not, they are not only two separate words but they are two separate meanings...

You don't belong anywhere near him, let the ex-wife continue her road of destruction you need to ensure he doesn't swoop you into that mould. That's why other's left, those love letters are his EGO and they are his shrine.

He is not a King and he will never find a Queen he's relishing in his ex-wife's "lay down her life for him" because she would.

Don't be another statistic.

CW

[mdraven380]

mdraven. MDRAVEN. mdraven.

I thought your photo was one of some model.. It is so beautiful and hot and then the close up even more so... I am shocked and I'm sorry, people choose alternative photos but this is actually you? Wow.

Okay, now that that is of my chest.

Think of this:-

predator:-

An interaction between two organisms of unlike species in which one of them acts as predator that captures and feeds on the other organism that serves as the prey.

This is what he is after, this is who he is.

2 marriages, 2 relationships, long hair, eyes that ooze sex, that being he thinks he's sexy, personally If I saw him I would run because I would know from those eyes, being a witch and all that, he's a predator.

EGO - and low self esteem, I disagree with your counselor.. He is ego driven :-

" Will you lay your life down for me?" His words.

" 13 years together, love with all my heart, would do anything for you" ex-wife, even though she re-married... He cast a spell.

Love letters, proclaiming their love - "he cast a spell"..

EGO driven.. has no comprehension what so ever what love is about, 2 marriages, 2 relationships, doesn't hear, doesn't listen because all he wants is control, all he wants is all women to fall at his feet like God...

Band: women falling all over him, giving to him from a young age. Guess what? He's getting older and those groupies will be long gone soon, long gone and he no longer will have control over women.

Predator? Because you were vulnerable, let alone as I said hot and sexy... He saw the writing on the wall and could take the control but you didn't speak the words the ex-wife did, does hence why he keeps sleeping with her too... Control.

He kicked all women out because it was his house, it was no longer what he needed... This was yours and you kicked him out...

Off course, they will treat you well in their own way, enough for you to feel that you are being treated well and forget the intuition especially through things that are going through your life and their not there for you, just hug you and then you feel they love you.

This man is bad news.. I can see it in his makeup.. The top, the long hair screams, "I'm hot", hence why he liked you, your hot...

He has no comprehension of what love really is only possession, predator like personality, control and kind of evil, wanting you to "lay your life down for him"... sorry that's kind of evil in my books.

HE LOVES HIMSELF BIG TIME.

Anyways, now that I am only slightly mad not fully angry lol, cut contact with him fully please....

These types of personalities can destroy you and bring you down so far that you don't know how to get up.

Just be angry and no longer be hurt...

Marylin Manson comes to mind with this guy and I bet if he wanted a Cult they would follow him.

They will real you in, like a fishing line and then send you out and then real you in again.

He said... Love and Care are the same? You know they are not, they are not only two separate words but they are two separate meanings...

You don't belong anywhere near him, let the ex-wife continue her road of destruction you need to ensure he doesn't swoop you into that mould. That's why other's left, those love letters are his EGO and they are his shrine.

He is not a King and he will never find a Queen he's relishing in his ex-wife's "lay down her life for him" because she would.

Don't be another statistic.

CW

Wow!
WC You really thought I looked like a modle?! That's cool.
I really like what you wrote and I don't want to be another statistic.
Funny thing is when I first met Scott he had all these women on his "MYspace" and I found out they were all of his EX'es!! I made him delete them and said I didn't want to be part of his harim!

Strange though I thought when I first met him he had "kind" eyes.

How did he "cast a spell?" Just wondering?
I didn't even find him attractive when we first met. I went out with him anyway and then he treated me very well and was very attentive to me. That's what sucked me in.

When he asked if I would lay my life down for him and sometimes he would say "would you die for me?" I actually told him "NO" most of the time. I said "I'd die to be with you but not for you".
He is manipulative to say the least and now he says he misses me so much,lol!
To bad now.

Actually I've met someone else. I'm taking it slow though to make sure of what I'm getting myself into this time.

Thanks for your words of wisdom.
Also one of my closest friends is a Wiccan.

[mdraven380]

Wow!
WC You really thought I looked like a modle?! That's cool.
I really like what you wrote and I don't want to be another statistic.
Funny thing is when I first met Scott he had all these women on his "MYspace" and I found out they were all of his EX'es!! I made him delete them and said I didn't want to be part of his harim!

Strange though I thought when I first met him he had "kind" eyes.

How did he "cast a spell?" Just wondering?
I didn't even find him attractive when we first met. I went out with him anyway and then he treated me very well and was very attentive to me. That's what sucked me in.

When he asked if I would lay my life down for him and sometimes he would say "would you die for me?" I actually told him "NO" most of the time. I said "I'd die to be with you but not for you".
He is manipulative to say the least and now he says he misses me so much,lol!
To bad now.

Actually I've met someone else. I'm taking it slow though to make sure of what I'm getting myself into this time.

Thanks for your words of wisdom.
Also one of my closest friends is a Wiccan.

CW
Opps sorry I got your initials backwards.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

WC/CW we get it all the time lol.

How did he "cast a spell?" Just wondering?

I just see this person (seeing as all on My-space were ex's), (seeing as his ex wife would lay her life down for him ), (seeing as women write love letters to him and hold him dear), that he has some form of charisma which would include "treating women" like beautiful creates and attentive, casting a spell, weaving his way into their lives and wanting them to "lay their life down for him".... All ego and all intentional....

His spell is in how he makes everyone of them feel the need to love him and only him...

You broke it!! I think... hence why he's determined and will be not to let you win, he will try over and over to whoo you back into his harem haha but you saw that at the beginning and it's stuck there, never waived.

Good for you, you deserve and good that you'll take it slow.

And, yessum your hot, bad luck lol...

CW