[rcoreyus]

That is a really really good point. One goal in life is not to be part of a tragedy, and lack of communication is at the heart of most tragedies.

It reminds me also of storys I have heard in my life, where people "didn't talk" met up 20 years later and then discussed it all, only to find out "if only I had done that", he had thought this, etc....
CW

[SEXXYJ]

I think "take a step back" means he doesn't want to continue what you had. He realizes he could have made a mistake. To tell you the truth it doesn't sound like you were being responsible enough. I mean, you got pregnant but before starting a relationship with someone else you should have made sure everything was ok. Like getting a checkup for stds, pregnancy test, etc. You should always do that before you just jumping into something new. That way you avoid problems like the one you have now. I"m not trying to be harsh, its just the truth, sorry.

[ScaredandExcited]

I know were your coming from, this is kinda what happened to me. Last year (i was 15) i was totally in love with this boy. I had been going out with him for at least 10 months, how ever when we broke up with eachother (he started to be really arsy with me). I found out i was pregnant not long after, i did try to tell him but he didn't wana know. His friend told me that he said if i kept it he would change his id, and he wouldn't help me out at all. This broke my heart even more as i got attached to my baby, when telling my mom she made me get a abortion (which i know was the right thing to do,even though i had secretly fell in love with my baby) After having the abortion is suffered from depression and went off the rails, i shut all my emoctions out and everyone elses too. Thinking about it now it was such a selfish thing to do, and i regreat it. I still cry to this day about the abortion. I wouldnt do it again. I can understand were your coming from, things will get better in time trust me x Good Luck

[ScaredandExcited]

Youve made the right choice hun, good on ya youve put your foot down so keep it down hun!

[SweetP]

I think "take a step back" means he doesn't want to continue what you had. He realizes he could have made a mistake. To tell you the truth it doesn't sound like you were being responsible enough. I mean, you got pregnant but before starting a relationship with someone else you should have made sure everything was ok. Like getting a checkup for stds, pregnancy test, etc. You should always do that before you just jumping into something new. That way you avoid problems like the one you have now. I"m not trying to be harsh, its just the truth, sorry.

I appreciate the honesty. The previous relationship wasnt really a relationship it was more like a fling. When I met my new bf I wanted to take things slow with him & we did. We never had sex and I actually wanted to keep it that way for a while. We connected in an emotional level and that definitely brought us closer. But I do agree with you. I dont feel like I need to be with him nor any man right now. It just sucks that it turned out this way, thats all.

[SweetP]

Youve made the right choice hun, good on ya youve put your foot down so keep it down hun!

Thank you. I really appreciate that. Its not easy but I will definitely keep my foot down

[SweetP]

Last update on this...
I wrote him a letter, letting him know exactly how I feel. I also said in the letter that I made a decision that was very difficult for me but that Im doing ok thank God (Im assuming he knows Im talking about the abortion, I didnt want to write that in an email) I let him know that I still wanted him in my life and that I understand why he felt the need to "take a step back" and so on...
He texted me after he read it and said hes been very busy and he will contact me soon so we can talk about it. Its been a couple days and no call, no email, nothing.

Im completely fine though because it shows me how much I really meant to him. Its over in my heart. I dont want to be with a man like that anyway. He cant even take a minute to call me and ask if Im ok. He knows very well that making that decision would be hard on me and life changing but he could care less. Thats what I wanted to see for my closure. I dont need a person like him in my life.
Im happy I found out early into the relationship

[chica]

I am sorry you are going through this...
I myself had an abortion, and a unsupportive boyfriend. I didnt have the same card you were dealt. But the baby was my boyfriend of over a year and half. At that point in time, our relationship was ok. It could have been better, looking back now. Because he was quite never involved in the relationship as I was. But me being 22 and not really noticing the signs, which honestly I chose to ignore. My boyfriend, I told him the day of the procedure to just go onto work, and then come to my house and take care of me. He agreed, (he had just started a brand new job). I later in the week had some comlications. After the procedure, it hurt to walk, but I thought it was just from the procedure, you know just being so sore. But it turned out I had two much pregnancy tissue still left, so I had him take me to the hospital. He was more concerned about his new job, than how I was. It hurt, during that time, he was planning to break up with me. I guess from the time I told him I was pregnant, to the time of the procedure. He finally told me, after a week or so, he was going to end the relationship, and I got over it.

How do you get over something like that? Is what I thought at the time! I ended up coming to peace with it a few weeks after it was done. Anways the boyfriend and I ended up staying together, after a huge fight. I pointed out he was weak, to want to leave me like that. To hurt me, the one person who never turned my back on him. (Long family history and relationship history of just hurtful stuff). Either way he was still a jerk, and I should have let the relationship end there. But we ended up staying together for another year, and it was terrible, the relationship was over before the abortion took place, just wasnt on myside, but I should have let it go. The things he put me through. I just want you to know its not so bad.

This boyfriend of yours I understand it hurts very badly. I am not sure of your ages, but taking on another persons responisbilites is a hard thing to do. You can give him some more time, let him know you are doing ok. And move on.

You seem to be handling it very well as the abortion goes. It is a hard thing to deal with especially when you have friends who are against it, and things like that. I hope this all works out for the best for you. COngrats on the new job!

As far as if he doesnt come back, if he cant handle having the truth told then I am sorry how is he going to be able to handle anything in life? Maybe this was one of those big signs. And I dont think you acted to irresponsible, in your stop dating someone then wanting to wait to sleep with another. It was a month, that for most std's will show up. And with preganancy it could take up to 3 months for it to show up, or you start feeling any of the symptoms. But what I am glad you did was wait to sleep with this guy. That shows you arent easy nor do you care to act that way. Most people these days dont bother to get tested. When I did "sleep around" I got test every three months" and birth control"

You handled this situation very well, considering what you were dealt. Good job to you my dear, good job.

HOpe you are doing well, and Have a good first day at work.