[WildChild]

i asked to watch it with him but he doesnt want to we just end up laughing about it and not getting in the mood over it lol i dont know maybe things will change when we get a house together etc.. you think? need to be positive i guess or things could get worse.. thanks for replying

Getting a house together won't help for long. If you don't resolve this now, he will have no reason to alter his behavior later. He doesn't see any reason to alter it now. What does that tell you about how much he values you?

jns asks some good questions.

[JadedQueen]

Does he have any medical issues that you are aware of or is he on any medication? Often times a medical condition or medication for a medical condition can have an effect on a person's sex drive. When your relationship first began how often were you having sex? Was it a lot more and it's drastically decreased or has it always been once a week? Also... you mentioned he lives with his Mom next door... do you live alone? Have a roommate? When you do have sex is it in an empty house or do you have to worry about someone overhearing you?

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I think it would help us most definately if you answer some of our member's questions, to assist in answering you further. Referring to JNS and JadedQueen...

Because your answers may very well lay within their questions...

I also know your 19 but I think our members are skirting just a little, until they know more, on the Porn issue, bless them.. Can't blame us for being Mum's and Dad's too.

I would like to ask as well, what do you two do during the week, in each other's pockets? Seeings as you live next door to each other, or don't see that much of each other, and only curiousity What was your parents reaction to such an age difference when they found out?

CW

[sarahjane_91]

He works all day, then i go see him when he comes home, Sex was the same at the beginning, He is honest about the porn and that doesnt bother me because i know alot of guys watch it, yeah we see alot of each other i sleep at his 6 days out of 7, he is a nice guy so parents were no bothered about his age, I wil ask hi if he is in the mood for sex because its been some days now and he just says no then we snuggle and go to sleep, when i find a stable job and he has some payments cleared he said we can think about moving in together he just want to have secure money for a house, his mom is usually in the house sleeping when we do have sex, i asked him lastnight if there was a problem with me and he said no and that he loves me the way i am and that he just doesnt want sex as much as i do, he does work alot and i am arond him alot when he isnt work.. maybe he needs some space? we have talked about the future, getting engaged etc.. he wants it to happen but said i need a job and then we can move in together and get engaged, he isnt on any medication i think thats all the questions i needed to asnwer.. thanks for any advice!!

[sarahjane_91]

also i live with my parents, hes not embarresed about being around me, we go to his friends and socialise together, everything is good, its just he doesnt want sex, he has only had 1 serious relationship before me and he was single for over a year before he got into a relationship with me..

[WildChild]

Why do you want to move in with and get engaged to a man who doesn't meet your needs sexually?

[sarahjane_91]

because its just sex! im happy i just thought we could be happier if we could do it more but ie read at age 30's men lose there sex drive

[stressed]

You WILL be happier if you have sex as much as you want to. It's not "just sex", it's a need just as important as eating and drinking. Apparently your needs aren't on the same level, or he chooses to satisfy his elsewhere (porn/whatever). It's not his job that it's the problem, he's clearly said that he doesn't want it as much as you do. Have you asked him why? Is it because he doesn't think about sex, or that he doesn't have the energy for it since he masturbates however many times a week? You need to have this clarified as we're talking about your life. Don't commit unless this is solved, as it won't go away. You'll only be thinking of sex daily and he'll only be turning you down.

Be careful as this is very serious, more serious than you think at the moment. It's something that can make you very unhappy down the road and the longer you're in it the harder it will be to end it.

[WildChild]

because its just sex! im happy i just thought we could be happier if we could do it more but ie read at age 30's men lose there sex drive

Bull
They shouldn't

[jns]

because its just sex! im happy i just thought we could be happier if we could do it more but ie read at age 30's men lose there sex drive

Obviously that was a work of fiction. My father was 51 when my younger brother was born and my mother (36 at that time) had her tubes tied so she wouldn't get pregnant again. They didn't do it just to spend money.

He is in control of when you have sex. If he was willing to give in to you as much as you are to him, he would be willing to have some weeks where sex was on your schedule, many times a week.

He could be worried about waking his mom, but other than that, I do not see a reason why he does not make more effort.