[KMonte85]

And at the end of the day, you can say you love this woman and you're the only one that knows whats in your heart, but you seem to dislike everything about her which to me, doesn't equal love much.

I tend to agree with BD here, Mark. Maybe because I'm making it personal, but I couldn't fathom one day calling my SO the love of my life, the point from which all beauty erupts, my soulmate... then mere hours later say he is a stone cold faker, someone whom I would like to punish with feces, the absolute bane of my existence. Those feelings are too polar to be real. So as I see it, one (or both) of them are not... maybe I'm wrong here. But thinking in terms of people I am head over heels for, and people that I wouldn't waste a a good loogie on... that path of love/disdain would never cross.

Perhaps you're right, what is best for you, what is best for your wife.. is to go your separate ways so you both can find what makes you happy. I just hope you can keep it civil for the sake of your son. From my observations, ugliness of divorce is what hurts children more than the divorce itself.

[BabyGirl]

Mark, on this statement

BabyGirl, I have talked to an attorney about my SSI disability and no can do to speed it up. No matter what I've got going on.

I didn't mean to Speed the settlement up. I meant for you to protect the Larger settlement when it comes in. The Back Pay can be a fairly large amount.

If you get a legal Separation instated before it comes, then she will have no way to claim 50% should there be a Divorce. You suggested she may just be staying until the larger money came in. So getting the Legal separation would let her know she would have no claims to the money.

That way you can Determine if she is staying with you for Love or for Money.

[Guest]

My mood and attitude are a direct result from her attitude. This roller coaster she has strung me along on just got stopped, or at least I got off of her train wreck. Let her train wreck keep going- I'm just numb to it all anymore. I feel a heck of a lot better since I let go and let her keep it up. I'm letting her get finished with her little hissy fit and find out where we stand from there. Like I said, I'm on an even keel and I'm staying here and she can choose to let it go or ride it into the ground- Whatever-
I'm doing work on the house so I don't have to listen to her carry on like a fool. I just go outside and do my thing. I stay up as long as I possibly can so I don't bother her sleep or anything else she has going on, I'm totally out of her hair, out of her way and totally tuning her out when she goes into one of her little tyrades(sp?). I'm shut down from her until she gets Her emotions back under control, this loving me one minute and wants a divorce the next is getting very old. Maybe I should go get an attorney right now and see what I need to do. She is going through menopause and maybe some of it is caused by that, I don't know. All I know is that a good cold beer and a honky tonk bar sounds Fantastic right now! Might even get to dance a little to get my mind off this carp.

[Guest]

Mark, on this statement


I didn't mean to Speed the settlement up. I meant for you to protect the Larger settlement when it comes in. The Back Pay can be a fairly large amount.

If you get a legal Separation instated before it comes, then she will have no way to claim 50% should there be a Divorce. You suggested she may just be staying until the larger money came in. So getting the Legal separation would let her know she would have no claims to the money.

That way you can Determine if she is staying with you for Love or for Money.

I'll check into that today. I'm just tired of being strung along until I'm dry and then taking everything else I own. Been there twice and learned my lesson very well.

[BabyGirl]

Mark,
It can't hurt to talk with an attorney of your concerns. A legal Separation will not be a Divorce or even that you will seek to be Divorced in the Future.

It will however show any future Divorce Judge, that you did not Just walk out, you were unwilling to Abandon your Son and wife, that You attempted to salvage your marriage at the same time salvage and protect your Income and your plans for your Sons future.

I can't remember what thread it was, but it was about Custody of a Child. Someone, a Male that had gone through it, Said Lawyer up now and get a Pitt Bull Type Lawyer, ( or words to that effect ).

Whether you and the Mrs work this out or not, She is talking Divorce sometimes and not other times. It is Time for you to Protect Yourself and your Son.

If she Files for Divorce First, You will start out in the Losing End and have to Fight and Claw your way through this and probably still lose the battle in the long run.
If you file for the Legal Separation it may well put you up at least to an even starting point , should it come to an all and out battle of Custody, Money, Alimony, Child Support.

If she will not agree to a Legal Separation, then you should know where this will be heading. You will be the Duck, flying over the Marsh, while all the Lawyers and the Mrs. are sitting in the Blind, waiting to waste your *** .

[Guest]

Well BabyGirl, she won't agree to it. She said this morning that she wants to work things out. I'm being overly cautious now and I'm on high alert. Something about it all is not adding up. Like I have said, she's still on that roller coaster.
If I get a Legal Seperation, will she be served papers to that effect? I'm wondering about that too. I'd like to keep it as quiet as possible, Case dot Net here in Missouri. It's possible for anyone to look at anyone's personal info about legal things.