[kjersi]

I No Longer Kno What To Do..i Dont Kno Where To Vent.....in Late June Me And My Husband Were Having Problems And Decided To Call It Quits....but I Wasnt Ready For That....i Had One Of My Ex's Come Over And Talk With Me..cuz I Had No One Else...when My Husband Found Out About This He Went And Slept With A Coworker....(this Was When He Was Gone) We Talked About Things And After Being Gone For Only About Wekk And Half He Came Home....he Never Told Me About The Girl....then In About August I Talked With Her Somehow And She Told Me That Were Together To The Day....had Been Since Late June ..early July..she Told Me All Kinds Of Stories Some I Believed And Some I Knew Just Werent True...i Didnt Kno What To Believe...i Thought Ok She Lying About Some Things Its Possible Shes Lying About Everything....comfronted My Husband He Admitted To The One Ocassion When We Apart And We Went Back 2 Our Lives....now She Says Shes 2 Months Pregnant....my Husband Says Thats Not Possible....he Says It Would Be Dumb To Lie To Me About It Becuz Its Not Like If He Did It Would Go Away..he Doesnt Want Ne More Kids....i Believe Him ....her Stories Dont Add Up..i Just Think Y Would Someone Lie About That..what Is She Hoping To Get???yesterday Herbrother Who Works With My Husband Said Shes 3 Months Pregnant..stories Keep Changing....she Keeps Stuttering And I Am So0o0o0o Lost!!!

[sourpuss]

Are you planning on staying married? Are the two of you in counseling together? If not, you need to be, desperately.
I would suggest a paternity test (not sure if those can be done before the baby is born, I think they can) And I would also suggest getting a lawyer. If the baby is his and you plan to stay married, the two of you will be paying child support. And from the sounds of this woman, child support to her will be the least of your concerns.

Tough spot you are in, I hope everything works out. The cynic in me wants to tell you to look out for yourself first!!

[JubesInquest]

Are you planning on staying married? Are the two of you in counseling together? If not, you need to be, desperately.
I would suggest a paternity test (not sure if those can be done before the baby is born, I think they can) And I would also suggest getting a lawyer. If the baby is his and you plan to stay married, the two of you will be paying child support. And from the sounds of this woman, child support to her will be the least of your concerns.

Tough spot you are in, I hope everything works out. The cynic in me wants to tell you to look out for yourself first!!

I agree w/Sourpuss.

When your husband says "That's not possible", does he mean it's not possible he got the woman pregnant, or does he mean it's not possibe that she's 2 months' pregnant?

Anyway it goes, Sourpuss pretty much summed it up: (if you plan to stay married) get counseling; get a lawyer; get a paternity test.

If you DO stay married, should this woman want child support, YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND will be paying it. He will have visitation rights, so be prepared.

[kjersi]

Not Possible

When He Says Not Possible He Says 2 Months Pregnant...he Asid He Only Slept With Her Once While We Were Apart..then He Tried To Go To Her House Once More In The Same Time...when We Were Apart And He Said He Couldnt He Felt Guity...we Were Fine Our Marriage Acctully Improved....i Could Tell He Genuinley Gfelt Bad ..and I Did Not Blame Him Since We Were Apart At The Time..and The Whole Reson He Did It Was He Was Exceedingy Mad...i Will Notstay Married To Him If She Is Any Less Monthas Pregnant Than What Would Make Sense As To The Date....i Think She Is Lieing.....i Just Have Doubts..this Is A Girl That When He Left That Day ..got All Mad And Said She Was Gonna Make Him Pay..a Girl Whos Stories Dont Add Up And I Caught In Stuttering In 1 Alredy...so I Just Think It Is Possible She Just Wants To Have Him....

[JubesInquest]

This is a rough situation to be in.

Do you feel comfortable with all this? I mean, if your husband got "mad" and went and slept with another woman, what's to say he won't get "mad" again and do the same.... be it with her OR another woman?

I wouldn't be able to trust anything that comes out of either person's mouth, b/c they both lied.

The woman may want him; but look, she's already had him!

To me, it doesn't matter how far along she is in her pregnancy; if the baby is his, she will certainly be seeing more of your husband because he will have some form of custody or visitation. Also, she will be in you & your husband's finances.

Think about these things... I mean really think about them.

Should you & your husband get back together, you will a whole new set of issues to deal with... and you will need to be strong enough to deal with them.

Do you & your husband already have children? Have you both explained to them that they may have another brother or sister coming... but not by you?

[sourpuss]

This is a rough situation to be in.

Do you feel comfortable with all this? I mean, if your husband got "mad" and went and slept with another woman, what's to say he won't get "mad" again and do the same.... be it with her OR another woman?

I wouldn't be able to trust anything that comes out of either person's mouth, b/c they both lied.

The woman may want him; but look, she's already had him!

To me, it doesn't matter how far along she is in her pregnancy; if the baby is his, she will certainly be seeing more of your husband because he will have some form of custody or visitation. Also, she will be in you & your husband's finances.

Think about these things... I mean really think about them.

Should you & your husband get back together, you will a whole new set of issues to deal with... and you will need to be strong enough to deal with them.

Do you & your husband already have children? Have you both explained to them that they may have another brother or sister coming... but not by you?

Good points, again.

This is soooo complicated. If it were me and there were no kids involved, I'd walk away from this one. It seems like this is the beginning of the drama ahead and you two are already struggling to make it work.

You are essentially becoming a stepmother in your own marriage because your husband (supposedly) was throwing a temper tantrum?! Is it worth staying?

[kjersi]

Our Kids

We Do Have 2 And They R 2 And 1 ..he More Than Anything Doesnt Wasnt Ne More..and The Idicator Of How Far Along She Is ..my Proof Wether He Is Lying About Being With Her More Than That Time Which Was Before July 4th.....thats The Only Way He Can Remember Exactlly When ..cuz After That We Got Back 2gether And He Came Home...the Whole Getting Mad.. I Accepted It Becuz We Split Up And It Was Pretty Harsh....pretty Bad...we Werent Goin To Get Back Together But I Wanted To.....we Just Took Each Day As It Came..i Had My Ex Come Over Who Is The Father Of My 2 Yr Old....my Husband Should Really Be Hes Been There Since She Was Born...but He Got Mad When He Found Out About This And He Called It Revenge..becuz He Thought I Did Something With Him.....i Should Of Never Invited Him To Come Talk With Me And That Is Y This All Happened....i Kno He Feels Bad....its Just If She Was Pregnant From That One Time Then She Would Be Like 18 Weeks And Alredy Kno The Sex.....i Kno Alot Bout Pregnancy And Am Goin To Be A Rn In Labor In Delivery..and Thats All Im Goin On Now.....ican Accept Her Being That Pregnant But Any Less Would Mean He "cheated" Meaning While He Was Back At Home ...i Dont Kno I Kno Girls Can Lie...i Had A Close Friend Do It ...she Even Lied To Friends

[sourpuss]

Sounds like you've already forgiven him, actually doesn't seem like you ever got to that point. You are placing all blame for the situation on yourself and the other woman. Has your husband done nothing wrong in this situation?

[patricias213]

We Do Have 2 And They R 2 And 1 ..he More Than Anything Doesnt Wasnt Ne More..and The Idicator Of How Far Along She Is ..my Proof Wether He Is Lying About Being With Her More Than That Time Which Was Before July 4th.....thats The Only Way He Can Remember Exactlly When ..cuz After That We Got Back 2gether And He Came Home...the Whole Getting Mad.. I Accepted It Becuz We Split Up And It Was Pretty Harsh....pretty Bad...we Werent Goin To Get Back Together But I Wanted To.....we Just Took Each Day As It Came..i Had My Ex Come Over Who Is The Father Of My 2 Yr Old....my Husband Should Really Be Hes Been There Since She Was Born...but He Got Mad When He Found Out About This And He Called It Revenge..becuz He Thought I Did Something With Him.....i Should Of Never Invited Him To Come Talk With Me And That Is Y This All Happened....i Kno He Feels Bad....its Just If She Was Pregnant From That One Time Then She Would Be Like 18 Weeks And Alredy Kno The Sex.....i Kno Alot Bout Pregnancy And Am Goin To Be A Rn In Labor In Delivery..and Thats All Im Goin On Now.....ican Accept Her Being That Pregnant But Any Less Would Mean He "cheated" Meaning While He Was Back At Home ...i Dont Kno I Kno Girls Can Lie...i Had A Close Friend Do It ...she Even Lied To Friends

You cant just blame the other woman, it takes two not just one. Your hubby is to blame just as much as the other woman. If you invited the father of YOUR child to come over that gives your husband no reason to go out there and cheat on you. Just as you know girls can lie men can lie also..
An amnio test can be done to determine who is the father BUT its not 100% accurate and it dangers the baby.

[JubesInquest]

Kjersi,

When you & your husband split, did you have a girlfriend or sister, relative---heck even a counselor or therapist that you could have talked to?
Why (of all people) your ex?

Yes, you have a child by him... but that's the last person you call when you have trouble with your spouse. It's almost as if he's the person you want to help you out when you're in a jam---that's a no-no.

A lot of men have a problem with ex-S/Os and husbands---especially when they have a child or children together. It may have already been fragile ground on the part of your husband to know that you have a child w/someone else b/c after found out you invited the ex over, he quickly got angry and slept with someone else... then called it revenge!!!!

But now you see, he's probably feeling like he got even b/c YOU have a child by someone else; and now, HE'S got a child by someone else.

This is going to be serious drama and problem all around--- and now 3 innocent babies are going to be caught up in the middle of it.

People will use children to hurt the other parent as much as possible.